(Closed) Did he ask your parents’ permission to marry you?

posted 12 years ago in Family
  • poll: Did he ask your parents for permission to marry you?

    Yes, he asked permission, for their blessing, or otherwise informed them and I'm glad he did

    Yes, but I wish he hadn't...we are adults!

    No, and I'm glad he didn't...we are adults!

    No, but I wish he had asked or informed them

    Other (explain below)

  • Post # 77
    Member
    374 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    My Fiance asked my fathers permission last March- and we went ring shopping that week only to be engaged a few weeks later 🙂 I’m very happy he did- I know my father thought it was very thoughtful.

    Post # 78
    Member
    1 posts
    Wannabee
    • Wedding: April 2010

    My fiance wrote my parents a six page letter informing them…..but not really asking their permission.

    Post # 79
    Member
    2777 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2010

    FH asked my parents permission – well my dad more than my mom but it meant a lot to him so I’m glad he did.

    Post # 80
    Member
    1037 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2010 - Carlouel Yacht Club

    Mr. Buttons is very traditional…so I knew he would ask my dad for permission! I am glad that he did, but Daddy Buttons kind of gave him the 3rd degree, which is very strange because my dad is kind of the silent type. I guess people are usually intimidated by him because of the fact that he is quiet and very smart…scary to those that aren’t familiar with him! Anyway, they were talking for about 45 min before he gave the “ok!” My mom wanted to die, and kept sticking her head out the window trying to make my dad “cut it out!”

    Post # 81
    Member
    653 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    My mom & sister knew my Fiance was going to propose and the night before he did he went to my parent’s house to ask for permission (even though it was obvious they’d say yes). When he got there he was really nervous and wanted to ask my dad but all my dad wanted to talk about was beer and cars. Finally my Fiance was like “well, I bought a ring and was wondering if I could give it to your daughter.” 

    Post # 82
    Member
    2530 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    Yes, he did ask and Im glad! I always imagined it being that way. He called my dad the night before he proposed! He also showed my younger brother the ring before hand so 2 people in my family knew!

    Post # 83
    Member
    1509 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    Yes, he went to my parents house without my knowledge and talked to both of them and my brother.  My dad actually tried to talk him out of it (thanks dad!)  My dad kept saying that “she’s a handful, are you sure?” apparently close to 7 times.  Oh well.  I am a handful.  Fiance puts up with me.

    Post # 84
    Member
    948 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2010

    Yes, I was surprised to find out when he had done it, but I’m glad he did and I figured he would.  We were going on a conference/vacation to Orlando in January and he had a convenient morning off the day before and met my dad and brother half way (they live an hour and a half away) to give them our pets for the week.  Apparently he asked for their blessing at the rest stop while walking the dog.  What shocked me was that my family actually kept it a secret- even a week later when I went home to pick up our monsters after the trip!  Keeping a secret of this magnitude is next to impossible for my family.  I still had no clue 2 weeks later when he proposed. 

    Post # 85
    Member
    873 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 1969

    I’m happy for all of you who were touched that he asked if that is important to you…but I would have been so incredibly angry if he had asked my parents.  We both love our families, but he knows that I really disagree with any concept of being ‘given away’ or being under my mum’s care (as my father has passed away).  If he had asked my mum, I don’t think I could have married him because it would have meant that he obviously didn’t know me at all.

    Post # 86
    Member
    2090 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    No, of course he didn’t ask permission. I was 27 years old, a professional woman, an adult on my own for many years…permssion? No, sorry, we’re adults and no one is being bartered away here. I’m happy to know mom and dad love him, but I certainly don’t need permission to marry, neither does FH.

    Post # 87
    Member
    168 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    My Fiance asked my parents beforehand.  He even drove 3 hours down to ask his permission!!  🙂  Needless to say I said yes, but after that I still am apprehensive about gifts I receive on Christmas day 🙂  hahaha

    Post # 88
    Member
    286 posts
    Helper bee

    He asked my grandfather who I consider to be my father….It was extremely touching because I have two aunts…one who had to get married and my other aunt has never been married before…So this tradition was extremely special to my grandfather…

    Post # 89
    Member
    58 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: July 2010

    He didn’t ask, and I agree with his reasoning why, I just wish a little he had of because my parents felt a bit hurt that he didn’t. Especially since my sisters now Fiance asked them for permission only 5 months after we got engaged. 

    Post # 90
    Member
    13561 posts
    Honey Beekeeper

    My Fiance took my parents to dinner and asked them. He also took my big brother out and asked him (because Fiance knows that Brother Gemstone and I are really close!).

    I LOVED it.

    Post # 91
    Member
    447 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2009

    We didn’t ask for permission, but we did ask for their blessing. Technically, when we talked to them, we had already been engaged for 3 months; my parents still don’t know. I hate the thought of having to get “permission” to make personal decisions for marriage or what have you. My parents don’t get to choose for me.

    That being said, my parents did tell me that he would have to ask. I didn’t agree and I’m glad that my husband and I didn’t stick to what’s considered the norm. I didn’t even get a formal proposal and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I’m a very independent-minded person and would have hated it.

    There are other reasons for this as well that I won’t get into.

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