(Closed) Did he have a ring before asking for blessing…?

posted 5 years ago in Waiting
Post # 16
Member
1238 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2017 - The Lodge at Little Seneca Creek

We picked out my ring, then he asked my dad for his blessing, and then he purchased it.

Post # 17
Member
1227 posts
Bumble bee

H and I agreed to marry before there was a “formal proposal” (I didn’t need one; he wanted one). I was ringless for awhile and there was no asking for blessings.

However, during that time we only told a few select people about our plans, my parents being two of them. My mom and I went dress shopping and my dad and my now-H hung out and watched sports and talked and we all met for dinner later. At that dinner, my now-H did ask them if he could have their “blessing” to become part of OUR family and take my maiden name as his middle name. They were incredibly touched and it was a very special night for us and a special thing for him to want to do. 

Post # 18
Member
6331 posts
Bee Keeper

He had the ring before he talked to my dad. My mom told me about their talk and that he did have the ring!

Post # 21
Member
2386 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

DH bought the ring then asked my parents for their blessing. It was important to me that he did this. Although we never discussed it beforehand, I’m happy he did it and so were my parents!

Post # 22
Member
431 posts
Helper bee

View original reply
winebarbiekiss :  Have you considered talking with him about it since the deadline has passed?

Post # 23
Member
1080 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

He had the ring for 3 months before talking to my Dad.  

Post # 24
Member
10829 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

View original reply
winebarbiekiss :  

Are you (and similarly minded bees) going to ask his parents  for their blessing before you accept the ring  ? Or is it just you that  gets ‘asked for ‘ ……

Post # 26
Member
10829 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

View original reply
winebarbiekiss :  

I meant will  you be asking. But now you  mention that he needs two sets   of blessings to propose  I wonder if he will say ” oh sorry OP,  no wedding after  all.  My/your mum/dad isn’t keen ” …

 …just to tease me… ? Why would this even enter your head or , I hope, his.?

Well, I’d better bow out, I clearly don’t understand any of this.   

Post # 27
Member
30 posts
Newbee

I found out over Christmas that my SO wont be proposing until he has the blessing of both my parents, but I know he has the ring.

Post # 28
Member
3209 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I told my DH not to ask my parents for a blessing. I just feel weird about that since I am an adult and it’s my decision and my future. They knew that’s where our relationship was headed anyway and have a wonderful relationship with DH. 

Post # 29
Member
119 posts
Blushing bee

View original reply
winebarbiekiss :  He didn’t ask until right before he proposed. He didn’t think they could keep it a secret. 

Post # 30
Member
1782 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

He never really outright asked for their blessing/permission. He had intended to ask my father in person and had told me that was important to him. Learning that he was such a traditionalist and knowing that he wouldn’t be meeting my father until 6 months later I wanted to cut down DH’s timeline. As we were about to visit my mother I made it clear it was only my mother who needed to approve of him (because mom is difficult and quick to criticise whereas dad is easy and I had no doubt he would love DH). So unbeknownst to me DH had actually already in secret commissioned my bespoke ring when I brought him to meet my mother. I don’t think he asked my mother outright for a blessing or even revealed he was going to propose but he was assured by the fact the meeting went so well and my mother absolutely adored him, I told him that my mother more than approved of him etc. I was hoping it would be enough but I didn’t know, he still said he needed to see my father.

He didn’t physically have the ring until the day before we left for the holiday he had planned the proposal for, so the approval from my mom was before that, but he still hadn’t met my dad.

After he proposed when we started calling our parents (and he actually spoke to my dad for the first time I think) I seem to recall him apologising to my dad ☺️ It was never an issue, my dad loves him and they got to meet for the first time a couple of months after the proposal. 

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