(Closed) Did I cheat myself out of some rite of passage experience?

posted 5 years ago in Dress
Post # 3
Member
3968 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@sherryberry:  I mean, I don’t think it really matters. To me, once I love a dress and I get a great deal on it… I’m done ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 4
Member
1063 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

yeah the part you don’t see is when the bride has a panic attack when she has to write out a 4 or 5 digit check hahaha. not so glamorous then! lol. don’t sweat it you will have 1000 moments. i had this convo w my family bc my sister bought my dress in front of just me, and my mom had a heart attack. who cares?? there’s plenty of magic moments to be had. have your friends and family seen your dress yet?

Post # 6
Member
853 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

It’s not really a rite of passage experience and not everyone has it.  I think a lot of this build up to finding the perfect dress or knowing it’s “the dress” is part of the “say yes to the dress” mentality.  But no, I don’t think you cheated yourself out of a moment, because they is no guarantee that you would have had that moment even if put in the same circumstance.

Some people try on a dress and suddenly feel “bridal” and know that they will be married in that (style of) dress.  Others don’t.  I found a dress and thought “sure, this will do, I like it” but I had no huge moment, nor did I feel as thought that dress was the ONE.  It was a dress, and it was pretty, and it worked.  But at the time it was 4 in the afternoon, my makeup was starting to smudge and I was tired from trying on two-dozen dresses and felt very unbridal at the time.

Weddings and the wedding experiences are like salaries and intelligence.  There will always be someone ahead and someone behind.  Always someone with a “better” and “worse” experience.  Even more, having that moment does not indicate a happy marriage or a perfect wedding day.

Post # 7
Member
3092 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I bought mine for 25$ on sale at Macy’s.  I sometimes feel like I miss out not having family nearby…but Fiance just reminds me it’s our way.  We’re independent.  We’ll have a really exciting wedding because everyone will be taking things in for the first time lol. 

Post # 8
Member
214 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@sherryberry:  No you didn’t cheat yourself! My family is over 3000 miles away right now so my Fiance went with me. I felt bad at first but once I found my dress it all melted away.

Post # 10
Member
181 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@sherryberry:  I ordered my dress online and was done without ever steping foot in a bridal salon. No need to second guess if you know your choices were right for you ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 11
Member
1004 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I’m not sure….for me, I  loved that experience, because I love dresses lol

that being said, i also lost said desire once I found the one.

To me finding your gown is like finding the guy you marry, and sometimes that happens in unexpected places.

maybe if you have doubts…make an appointment to go try on a few? it can’t hurt, and maybe going will help solidify in your mind that your dress is the right one and give you the experience you crave?

 

Post # 12
Member
407 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@chillinchillin:  +100!  You don’t need to spend a lot of money to find a beautiful and unique dress.  Yours sounds very special and you have a great story behind it ๐Ÿ™‚

Of course, if you want more encouragement, we’d love to see some pictures of your dress!

Post # 13
Member
886 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I ordered my dress online for dirt cheap. It looked great. No one was the wiser. I still beam about all the money I saved to this day. *That* was my moment. ๐Ÿ˜‰ To be honest, I didn’t even know about all the dress hype. The thought of spending $1000+ for a dress I’d wear for half a day was nauseating to me. As others have said, thanks but no thanks. I had plenty of other wonderful moments around and within the wedding without having to blow my budget.

Post # 14
Member
1478 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013 - Creek club at ion, SC

The part you also dont see is when they say …. yea, I dont like it and the brides face drops.

On your wedding day you will have the fussing and compliments and have saved a few bucks 

Post # 16
Member
4035 posts
Honey bee

@sherryberry:  I don’t think you cheated yourself out of an experience! I too did not have family when I bought my dress because they live out of town. A friend went with me and I bought my dress at a sample sale (which was crazy–I got 1 hour to try on multple dresses and decide on one). I got a heck of a deal, but on the “typical” bridal experience.

I know it’s a little bit of a bummer, but the cost savings makes it worth it!

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