(Closed) Did I commit a huge faux pas on our invitation?

posted 10 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 11
Member
1692 posts
Bumble bee

This is a well-known rule among people my age (which I would imagine is about your grandma’s age). Obviously it isn’t that well known among your peers (witness the bemusement of your peers here on this board). So, your own friends won’t think twice about it. Your fiance’s great aunts will go “tut, tut, she probably didn’t know any better; but she’s a pretty little thing, isn’t she?”  In between are a whole bunch of people who — if they notice at all —  will shrug and say “well, everything’s changed nowadays; I suppose that’s become the done thing.”

ETA actually, if it’s just an initial in one corner, the rare people who notice may just  think you’ve put it on in honour of your husband-to-be and not consider that you had any idea of using it as your own monogram.

Post # 12
Member
1919 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

I didn’t even think about that either. I definitely used his last name initial on our wedding invites for monograms. Really, we’re getting married and it will be my last name so its a mute point. I hardly doubt any of your guests will even notice it. 

Post # 13
Member
5988 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

so you used your soon to be married first initial surname – its the same thing i would have done to be honest and i would have thought it would be considered quite the normal thing to do

Post # 14
Member
6350 posts
Bee Keeper

No problem in my mind but I’m pretty lax about those kinda things.

Post # 15
Member
5109 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2011

Oh dont freak out. I think that is perfectly acceptable. 

Post # 15
Member
4581 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I’ve seen this done plenty of times. I think you’re overthinking it. ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 16
Member
3148 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Never, ever knew this.

First pearls are bad luck.

Now a forbidden letter on the invite.

Geesh.

Post # 17
Member
2017 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

Yes, it is considered improper but it’s probably not that big of a deal in the scheme of things. Feel free and proper, however, to order your thank you notes with your married monogram:) 

Anyway, I think I would have been more superstitious than worried about a breach of etiquette.  Luckily, you don’t have long to wait. lol

Post # 18
Member
572 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Who is it to say what is or isnt proper? I cant stand the whole “ohhh my gosh, thats an etiquette no-no”   PPPFFFTTTTTT is all I have to say about that!  Although my maiden name in on the invitation itself, I put our married Monogram on the back seal of our envelopes and was tickled pink to do so.  You definately shouldnt worry about it. Any one that cares about you wont be bothered by it at all.

Post # 19
Member
464 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I did it, but my FI’s grandma said it was really cute, and she is VERY conservative, so I doubt anyone will care. (Might be different in Holland where she is from)

 

Post # 20
Member
7691 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

View original reply
@MrsTrigger: we did that for our invatiation! On the front of it we had an “R” which is the first letter of my new last name. I didnt think about it for a minute!

Post # 22
Member
1065 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

View original reply
@MrsTrigger:

OHH in that case, I wouldn’t worry at all.  It’s just a monogram!!  If your actual maiden name is on the invitiation, no one will think twice!  ๐Ÿ™‚

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