(Closed) Did I create unnecessary drama??

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
7271 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

Since they have been broken up for over a year and a half I think it should be fine. There will also be 50 people there so it should be pretty easy to avoid each other of that’s what they want to do.

TBH I would be more worried about the girl (who definitely knows her ex will be there) than the guy. The guy has been seeing someone else for a year so I think it would be safe to assume he’s over her.

I don’t think you should worry about it 🙂

Post # 4
219 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

I had a few issues like these and eventually had to just hope that people would be adult enough to realize it was about us having people we care about around us. Unless it was some horrible … she cheated on him with his brother and then had his father’s baby type scenario. .. he should be able to get through an evening without drama.

Post # 5
4523 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@lilac_glamour:  They’ve been broken up a year and a half. They’re also adults, and should be able to be civil or just ignore eachother 🙂

Before dating me, my Boyfriend or Best Friend had been seeing a girl a few months. They were not anything serious or official, and he waited a few months before going out with me, in case she heard about it: he wanted to spare her feelings, even though everything was casual.

Well, his friends had girlfriends/wives that kept hanging with her, and it started to become an issues on the invites front. We had no problem being around her…but she was still pretty butt-hurt. His friends started having to invite us to events she wasn’t attending, and vice versa. It was so ridiculous.

Bottom line: everyone *should* be fine.

Post # 6
5220 posts
Bee Keeper

I would imagine that they probably have come to expect a run in like this to happen with your wedding and knowing y’all have stayed close friends. I wouldn’t sweat it!

Post # 7
562 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@lilac_glamour:  I don’t think it will be a big deal. BFF is in a different relationship and has obviously moved on. If he refuses to come if the ex is there then it’s on you to uninvite her, but I really doubt it will come to that.  

Post # 9
3078 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@lilac_glamour:  You might want to give him a heads up.  Especially since now he can expect to see her at the engagement shower and the wedding.

Post # 10
9954 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

Etiquette Snob here… lol

When it comes to a Regular Dating Relationship (ie NO Engagement, Living Together, Abuse, or Cheating say with the “new girlfriend”) a year is a fair expanse of time… where things get messy are when a couple were actually more comitted and things went off the rails… Broken Engagements, Leaving someone at the Alter… Marriages that have ended in Seperation or Divorce.

From your basic description here, I think you are good to go.  They’ll probably be quite civil to one another.

As for heads up, at this point, I think you have all the bases covered… everyone knows that the other’s being there is “a possibility”

So you cannot do much more than that… stop fretting, and over analyzing other’s relationships.. to do so will give you an unneccessary headache… lol.

They are adults they’ll figure it out.  So let it go… and enjoy your own relationship / Engagement (CONGRATS by the way)…

This is a special time in your life… savour every second.

Hope this helps,


Post # 11
731 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013


At my wedding there will be 2 guests the Fiance has made out with and 1 guest I hooked up with. True we weren’t in relationships but still. We’re all adults. It’s okay

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