Post # 1
So bees, I’ve gone anon for this one. I work in an elementary school environment, not as a teacher but as an aid through an external non-profit. We work in teams. This one guy on my team is very young, well under 21 (they strive for diversity, at any costs) and so he is usually not quite up to par on professionalism and personal responsibility.
A few days ago he lied about a close family member getting into a terrible car accident in order to leave work early. Which is silly; if you simply ask to go home, they let you, because we have personal days available. Well A lot of us did a ton of work for him that was due that day he left because we felt so bad for him.
Through various forms of social media, I learned that in fact he was very hung over and still a little high from the night before, so that’s why he left work. I was venting to one of my teammates (who is in a leadership position) about this, and she was shocked that he would do this. She asked me how I found out, and I told her I saw the pictures of him from the night before on the popular social media outlet. She asked if there was anything else on there like that, and we looked through it together. It turns out he smokes weed regularly, and in one instance drank alcohol while school was in session. I though she would just give him a stern talking to, but instead she elected to pass on the information (and pictures) onto superiors in the organization.
Now I know no one likes a snitch. But it wasn’t like I came running to my leader with the pictures in hand trying to get him fired. It turns out he was suspended for one day, and then posted on the social media that he “can’t wait until the day he gets back to deal with the girl on his team who he THINKS snitched on him.” Bees, I am kind of scared about what he might do or say to me if does find out it was me, but we work with at-risk youth, and to me this is also a really bad example for these kids. They have tough lives and deal with drugs and alcohol on a daily basis, and school should be a safe space. It turns out I am one of the only people he “added” from my organization on this media, so I don’t know if he’ll believe me if I say it isn’t me.
Did I do the right thing? What should I do if he confronts me?
Post # 3
I don’t think it’s ever smart to say anything to a supervisor that you don’t want action on. By venting to a teammate, who you knew was in a leadership position, you should have known that this could have gotten escalated, especially because being drunk/high at work is almost always in employment contracts as a fireable offense.
So now that it’s been escalated, the situation gets sticky. If his profile is private, and no one else from the office could have seen the pictures, he obviously will know it was you, and pretending that you didn’t say anything will probably make it worse. You have to own up to what you do, and you opted to bring this whole situation to light at work to a supervisor/leader. If he confronts you, tell him honestly that you did it because you thought it wsa a bad role model for the kids you work with and puts a bad face on your organization. Apologize for any trouble he got in, but don’t apologize for what you did if you believe you did the right thing.
Post # 4
You absolutely did the right thing. He should have been fired instead of just suspended for a day. His behavior is disgusting, and he shouldn’t be around children in the first place.
Post # 5
@anyanony: first off, you did the right thing. In fact, I would have gone directly to the supervisor upon seeing that he had consumed alcohol while at the school (the other stuff is his personal life–he clearly makes some questionable decisions, but the moment it starts affecting his job/the kids is when it matters.). As far as him posting that he’ll get back at who snitched on him on Facebook , I would hope it could be chalked up to him obviously being an immature, tough-talker, but in this day and age and having the potential to have children involved, you can’t be too safe. Please voice your concerns to your supervisor before he even gets the chance to confront you, perhaps he can be moved to another team. I’m a little shocked he kept his job–I was an aid for a while at an elementary school and with the invention of Facebook came a lot of “random” drug tests. Anyways, good luck and please let us know the final outcome!
Post # 6
You did the right thing, as a parent of a high schooler, I wouldnt want someone like that working with my sons. People need to learn that social media can effect your life, even your professional life. What if a parent had seen it, and often they do come across these things, it would have been much worse for him. His actions were irresponsible and stupid, totally his own fault.
Post # 7
I’m not a parent, but I think you did the right thing. I would not want someone working with my child(ren) that is hungover and/or still high. I think when you take on a role as a teacher or even a teacher’s aide, you are taking on the responsibility of being a good role model for children.
Post # 8
Post # 9
Thanks guys, this makes me feel better. I just really really don’t want him to confront me. I don’t know if I’d be able to own up to it. But thanks for the support bees.
Post # 10
@anyanony: I would suggest you go back to the supervisor with that message. Especially if it is posted on a public site where anyone can see it.
He is being stupid posting this stuff where his employers can easily find it and he is using it as a medium to threaten. Even if it is an empty threat, it isn’t ok or professional at all.
Post # 11
I would have to agree with a PP that you can’t say anything to a supervisor and expect it not to escalate.
However, I do think that the situation will be handled the way that it should be. He is supposed to be a role model for these kids. And you should never go to work (doesn’t mater what your job is) high and hung over. That is just irresponsible.
There are many companies that will actually search your FB page and you can actually get fired/or never hired in the first place just because of the pictures that you advertise on FB.
He will probably approach you about this issue and it is up to you how to react to it. But make sure that you stay professional about it. You wouldn’t want your job on the line as well.