Did I mess up my invites?

posted 2 months ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
Member
265 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: Scotts ~ Walnut Creek

The addition is corny, a little cringey and unnecessary. Do you absolutely need to have them redone? No. Would I have sent them out like that? Nope.

Post # 3
Member
333 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

It’s fine. Don’t give it a second thought. 

Post # 5
Member
11099 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

No mention of gifts is appropriate on or inside an invitation, even “no gifts.” The reason is that you are meant to be extending hospitality, not thinking in terms of gifts.

If it’s not a financial burden, personally I would redo.

Post # 6
Member
193 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2019

People are CRAZY for etiquette on here, I guarantee you no one in real life will give two hoots and definitely not worth wasting money redoing!

Post # 7
Member
1860 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

I’m with glitterweddingbee  – I’d  be surprised if anyone in real life cares.

Post # 8
Member
4679 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

tduck1 :  you’re fine. I’ve seen it pretty often in the UK.

Post # 9
Member
333 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding:  Australia

My friends didn’t have a wedding website so they put the “presence is gift” line on their invites. We’re glad to have that info on the card. We have a wedding website, so we put the “presence is gift” on the website. Personally I wouldn’t redo the invites, but then we’re super chill and maybe you have a black tie event?

Post # 10
Member
2492 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Not a problem – leave as is. Again in the UK it’s fine to mention gifts and really I think most guests prefer to be told what you want rather than having to ask around the family or bother you with the 100th call that day asking about them

Post # 11
Member
11099 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

It’s interesting that people are so quick to disregard etiquette as “dated” and old fashioned when it interferes with their own blatant self interest, but it’s horrible and terrible if a guest wears white, doesn’t bring or send a gift, RSVPs for uninvited guests etc. 

I don’t know why word of mouth if asked wouldn’t be sufficient.

Post # 12
Member
2498 posts
Buzzing bee

I think the language is cringe worthy. I personally would reprint.

Post # 13
Member
665 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

I personally wouldn’t do it but I don’t think I would care or even pay attention if I received an invite like that

weddingmaven :  everyone has their own opinion but I don’t think saying they don’t want gifts is particularly self serving…

Post # 14
Member
11099 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

katecod12 :  I definitely know what you are saying, and it’s a generous impulse, but gift giving is voluntary, optional  and the prerogative of the giver in any case. There is not supposed to be any thought, expectation or entitlement to the idea that people should otherwise be giving you gifts. 

If everyone wrote this on their invitations then the people who did not would eventually be seen as asking for gifts. It’s not supposed to work that way. 

Post # 15
Member
665 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

weddingmaven :  interesting point but in my culture weddings are a gift giving occasion so if a couple truly didn’t want gifts then they would have to specify, probably not on the invitation though 

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