- 4 years ago
- Wedding: October 2018
Hey, first time poster and I feel like I need to vent and get some advice on how to go about this without coming off….bridezillay. Lol
My side of the wedding party is fine, it’s my fiancee’s side that drama has appeared. Sooo, my fiance finally has picked his groomsmen, I already knew who they were going to be, I just didn’t know, who the best man was going to be. I had an idea between 2 people, Let’s call them A and B. So, everytime I asked him about his choices and who he was thinking about being the best man, He has always said A. This past week, he let his picks know, that he wanted them to be part of his party, all were on board. He was still thinking about the best man, I asked him again, he once again said A. So he made the choice and before telling anyone, he mentioned it to B.
B gets upset that they weren’t chosen. They make it known, and continues to make comments and “jokes” along the lines of ” Oh well, it’s not like I’ve known you longer, but ok…”. Of course my fiance tells me all this and I understand why B would be upset, but at the same time, it’s his choice and that’s that.
So after a few days, my fiance comes to me and says “Hey, I think I’m going to have 2 bestmen” Now, I would be absolutly fine with this, IF I didn’t know how B reacted and how my fiancee is. He doesn’t like confortation, so he tries to avoid it and make everyone happy even if it’s not exactly what he wants. Knowing this and the prior interraction with B, I feel like, he was guilt tripped into that choice. I love both A and B, we’re all great friends, but It really doesn’t sit well with me that I feel like my fiancee was guilt tripped into chosing both, when he initially had chosen A and now it just wouldn’t seem genuine.
I’ve talked this over with my fiancee, and he did admit that he was feeling guilty because of B’s reaction, which is why he came up with the idea. So I asked him to really think about it and if he really wants both, then so be it. So I’m wondering, Have any of you guys dealt with something like this? What did you do? Did you say something to the other person or let your signifcant other speak to them?