(Closed) Did you & your FI talk about marriage before he proposed?

posted 8 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Did you two talk about getting married before he proposed?
    Yes! We went and picked out rings together ! : (45 votes)
    41 %
    Yes, but his proposal was a total surprise. : (54 votes)
    50 %
    Marriage was an unspoken truth. We both knew it was where our relationship was heading! : (8 votes)
    7 %
    Once or twice but not seriously. : (1 votes)
    1 %
    Not at ALL! : (1 votes)
    1 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2196 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2017

    He used to talk to me about it all the time and I kinda brushed it off because it was a little too early for me.

    Fast forward a year later and I felt more secure with the idea of getting married at all and we both started talking about it.

    I started watching all those wedding shows so that sparked alot of conversations then we just started talking about our wedding and planning it before he even proposed.

     

    Post # 4
    Member
    2588 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: February 2014

    We talked about it from about month three, lol. He proposed after 4 1/2 months of dating, but we talked extensively about marriage first and he asked me about what kind of stone I’d prefer, what cut, etc.

    Post # 5
    Member
    491 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    We’ve been together for over seven years, we talked about it constantly! It was always just a matter of time for us, we wanted to wait until we were done with college and more settled.  I’m so glad we waited, because as much as I wanted to get married while I was still in college, it would have been so stressful!

    Post # 6
    Member
    1810 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2011

    We definitely talked about marriage before we got engaged, but I don’t remember having any long, drawn out conversations about it. We discussed our life goals when we first got together, and getting married and having kids was important to both of us, so we knew that it was a possibility for us right off the bat. I moved in with him in June 2008. He gave me a timeline of when he was going to propose in October 2008– within a year, we would be engaged.

    And luckily I didn’t have to wait a year, since I’m so damn impatient. On Valentine’s Day 2009, we were talking about engagement rings and he said, “Let’s go look at some.” We found one that we loved that day, he bought it and proposed on that day. I don’t think that was his plan, but I don’t really think he had a plan of when he was going to propose. It happened really naturally and it was a go-with-the-flow kind of day, which was really cool and special to us. 🙂

    We knew that we wanted to have a longer engagement, so I think setting the date was the most important day of our engagement. Because before then, it didn’t really seem on the horizon, I guess you could say. But once we set the date, it felt really real and we got super excited.

    I feel like were already married and it’s hard to imagine what will change once we’re married. I just hope it’s all for the good, and we can’t wait to find out. 🙂

    Post # 7
    Member
    1622 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    We talked about marriage all the time!  We talked about wanting kids, what we wanted our futures to be like, what career plans we have, financial matters… everything.  We moved in together after only 4 months of dating and immediately combined our finances.  He proposed at 8 months.  It wasn’t a surprise, although he thinks it was (shh!).  He planned the whole proposal and bought the ring without my help at all and it was very, very special.

    Post # 8
    Member
    14495 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    LOL, Yes we did and he said “NEVER AGAIN!”  So it was a total suprise when he proposed, I actually thought he was kidding.

    Post # 9
    Member
    1636 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    We talked about it and I picked out my ring I didnt know when or where he was going to propose though.

    Post # 10
    Member
    1854 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: December 2009

    We had one discussion early on in the relationship where we both agreed that the second we didn’t see this going towards marriage, we’d tell the other and not waste each other’s time. It was also clear that we wouldn’t move in until we were committed to each other.

    Eventually we started talking about our future, as we grew closer.

    Then, we talked about our hypothetical wedding (what we’d like, what we wouldn’t like).

    Then, we talked about living together more seriously, I reminded him that I didn’t want to move in until we’re engaged, and we got engaged during that discussion.

    Post # 11
    Member
    1810 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2011

    @egb: During that discussion? Do you think he was waiting for you to bring it up during that conversation so he could do the “oh, yea, by the way…will you marry me?” thing?? Sounds super romantic in my head… lol!!

    Post # 12
    Member
    1854 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: December 2009

    @JenniMichele:yeah I guess it was romantic, but it didn’t sound romantic then!

    It was more like business negociation:

    him: so, you want to be engaged BEFORE moving in?

    me: yeah, I thought it was clear

    him: well, hum.. I don’t want to get married right NOW

    me: me neither silly, first we’d move in, then we’d need about a year to organize the wedding

    him: ok let’s do this then

    me: OMG are you serious??

    And that was it! We started talking about the date, and already knew it would be a destination wedding..

    Post # 13
    Member
    92 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: April 2011

    The proposal was a surprise. Well, up until about 5 minutes before he was going to do it. I could see he was oddly nervous! But, we had talked about it before and he did prompt me to choose a ring I liked.

    Post # 14
    Member
    6572 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: February 2010

    My hubby and I lived together after dating 5 months, and he proposed after 11 months. I felt like it was a little early to start nagging and talking about marraige, even though I was totally ready! I guess I tried subtle hints, mainly watching wedding shows and making little comments. I knew we were headed in that direction anyway and figured I’d just have to wait a little bit longer, but glad I didn’t!

    Post # 16
    Member
    384 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    somewhere in the middle of the second year we started talking about it. . in part because I stopped hiding my wedding readings and tv shows.  We’d watch shows together and talk about what we wanted.  He “finally” proposed on a weekend getaway for our 2 year anniversary with a ring that was a total surprise.

    The topic ‘Did you & your FI talk about marriage before he proposed?’ is closed to new replies.

    Find Amazing Vendors