Post # 62
I’m going to ask one of my FI’s cousins. He doesn’t have a sister, but he has three cousins and I’m pretty close to one of them, so I’m asking her. I would ask the others if he wanted me to. He’s having my brother as a groomsman.
Post # 63
Yes, and we aren’t super close. But we do talk here and there.
Post # 64
- Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry
Nope, and I have one on each side- DH’s sister, and my brother’s wife. I was a Bridesmaid or Best Man in my brother’s first wedding, but not his second (I did a reading.) My brother did a reading at my wedding. DH wasn’t in his sister’s wedding.
So my two cents is NO, siblings don’t have to be in the wedding. I made nosegays for my SILs, as a little some extra nice. The smaller the bridal party the easier (I only had two.)
Post # 65
@MexiPino: DON’T DO IT!
You already know that they’re a pain to deal with – making them BMs will most likely lead to major stress, frustration and resentment.
Post # 66
yeah. What you said makes sense but honestly— when a fourty year old woman with kids says she’s bringing sides and appetizers to Thanksgiving, then shows up two hours late and hands you a box of frozen jalepeño poppers, you wonder if she can manage to take her brother’s wedding seriously and/or show up on time properly dressed. :-/ I love her. She will be so much fun to drink and dance with at the reception but ain’t to way she’s a bridesmaid.
Post # 67
yeah, the thing is I don’t think they WANT to be bridesmaids but I do think they’d feel obligated if I asked.
thanks! Yeah, I really think it would do more harm than good. I’d rather they not feel any pressure to do anything at all. Just show up and have fun.
Post # 68
Yes, I did and she’s not exactly gracefully participating… It’s important to my Fiance though. As long as she shows up and doesn’t get hammered I’ll call it a win.
Post # 69
Nope. Future Sister-In-Law and I aren’t exactly “close” but we get along just fine. I have only met her a handful of times (his family lives 8 hours from mine) and there have never been any issues when we were together. She’s also a lot younger than we are. I don’t think Fiance himself even asked me about it.
Post # 70
No. One of his sisters recently got married and made sure it was okay that I wasnt in the wedding and then begged me when she needed me for even sides. I refused. He knows his sisters annoy the ever living crap out of me and I dont like them so its okay that they aren’t in it. Its enough for me to just be around them.
Post # 71
yes, Mother-In-Law said if i didnt it would be a huge thing and she would be offended. so i did and she was. and she sucked at one. she was happy she was one but yeah she totally sucked as a Bridesmaid or Best Man. i think she was jealous.. ohhhh and this isnt DHs sister its my BILs wife. so a little different but DH didnt ask my brother to be a Groomsmen. i had kind of wished i totally didnt ask her. she kind of made a little trouble, and then also got ready some where else and had her hair exactly like mine. funny thing was i was having such a good time i didnt even notice till i looked at all our pictures… and she knew exactly how i was going to wear it ,that the Bridesmaid or Best Man were suppose to be the opposite. we had started out as friends years ago but she turned herself into a huge frienemy. she didnt help at all except she did make the boutonnieres, without me asking, and they were kind of ugly…. but i didnt have the heart to say anything so we used them… there is apart of me that wondered if she made them ugly on purpose..
Post # 72
@MexiPino: How many of them are there? I have one brother, so I definitely would expect my future husband to include him in the wedding party, but if someone has 3 sisters for example…that’s going to bump up the bridal party number significantly. Even though I personally feel like there’s no harm that can be done from having more people in the bridal party, I can understand how some people would like to keep the bridal party smaller and more intimate.
Post # 74
I asked 1. He’s got many sisters, so we decided on who to ask. She’s pretty much the closest with him than the others. Everything worked out fine. We go out with her & her husband from time to time. They live about 45 minutes away from us.
Post # 75
he has two sisters. Without them, I have three bridesmaids all of whom I’ve spoken to on at least a weekly basis for more than ten years. Since SO isn’t even that close to them (we see them about once every other month at my insistence), it feels very odd to me to almost double my party to include people I barely know. There are certainly at least four other women I’m much closer to and would choose before them.
Anyway the point of the post was to see how common it was, not really to see if I should. I know I’m not.
Post # 76
@MexiPino: yes i asked both FSILs to be in the wedding. But one backed out bc she got pregnant (she wasnt even trying). It just happened. But she was still helpful and involved in the planning and offered me her headpiece.