Post # 17
I feel your pain, Penguin. My maiden name is short and easy. My husband’s last name is 12 letters long and Dutch. No one can say it or spell it, and I feel like I’m holding up the line with the time it takes to sign the credit card slip at the store. I don’t like the name, and changing names was a huge hassle. I think I had to go to the bank seven times. However, there is light at the end of the tunnel! Four months into life with my new name, it feels normal. It’s not a hassle anymore, well most of the time, and I love that we have a FAMILY name, a name we share. It took some time, but I am glad I did it in the end.
Post # 18
i haven’t changed mine, but i consider myself to be mrs. him and not ms. her. honestly, i’ll probably change it if and when we have kids.
Post # 19
I’m going to change mine when we get married. Even though my initials will be BAG. Sexy, huh? :op
Post # 20
I changed my name to my husband’s last name soon after the wedding. I found the whole process to be pretty painless. Social Security was a cinch and the DMV was no problem after I had proof from Social Security. It was time consuming to notify creditors, utilities, and phone carriers etc. Most of them accepted my word and simply changed their records with a phone call. One utility wanted a ton of proof and one credit card wanted a letter.
While I have legally changed my name, I will continue to go by my maiden name at work. I work in law enforcement and everyone knows me by my maiden name and all of my professional certifications are under it as well.
Post # 21
I added my husband’s last name, no hyphen, a la Hillary Rodham Clinton. And honestly, it couldn’t be more confusing to most people. Both names are my last name, because I also kept my middle name, and because I wanted both names on my professional documentation – which wouldn’t necessarily happen if I made my maiden name my middle name.
Calling yourself one thing professionally and another thing socially is actually not a problem, although if you’re in a profession (like I am) where you need to sign your legal name, you need to take that into account. You can legally call yourself anything you want, as long as there is no intent to defraud, so if you want to keep your legal name as your maiden name but "go by" your married name socially, aside from any potential confusion when your professional and social lives overlap, it’s not an issue.
I have found, by the way, that if you take both names but don’t hyphenate, people feel free to call you by either one. So I have friends who simply call me by my married name, or by my maiden name, and co-workers who do the same. Luckily I’m not touchy about it.
Post # 22
I’m another in the maiden name to middle name category. It was a pain to get the driver’s license right, but I think that was user error on their part rather than regulations or software… I still miss my maiden name, but I’m getting used to it. There aren’t many options out there for two middle name initials though, so I’ve had to make exceptions on a few things (credit cards, various forms, etc.).
Post # 23
it wasn’t too difficult to change my name – both are the same number of letters – 3! my last name became part of my middle name so now i have two middle initials. i’m a high school teacher and over the summer i introduced myself to the new 9th graders with my new name so they all know me with my married name. it wasn’t too long before the whole school called me the new name. occassionally students do call me my maiden name, I don’t bat an eye at them, but i do really notice how weird it feels to be called my maiden name now.
Post # 24
I really wanted to use my maiden name professionally and his last name in my private life, but I don’t know if that will work. Mine is 9 letters and a ton of consonants. His is 11 letters long and full of vowels. Between the two names, there are only 7 letters of the alphabet that go unrepresented.
I sort of liked the idea of being able to leave my work persona behind when I am with my future husband, but the down side to being saddled with BOTH mouthfuls might be too much. I’ve been in my new job for 6 weeks and I have to spell my current/maiden name at least 3 times a day. At least his is a little more intuitive for most people.
Post # 25
I chose "Other" because I’m still not sure what I’m going to do! For years now I’ve been sure I would hyphenate. My fiance is usually laid back about everything so I was sure this wouldn’t be an issue to him. I’ve even mentioned it a couple of times before and he’s said he was happy with whatever I wanted to do.
But shortly after we got engaged I mentioned it again. Then my fiance, who never asks for ANYTHING, shocks me by admitting that he’s always hoped I would take his last name rather than hyphenating. I know this must mean a lot to him or he wouldn’t have gone to the trouble of mentioning it.
So now I’m not sure what to do. I know I’ll miss my maiden name but I also like the idea of taking on his last name. And I’d like to do this for him since he asks for very little. I wish there was a way of integrating my maiden name without hyphenating. Unfortunately, using my maiden name as my middle name won’t work since it’s masculine. 😉
PS — sorry for the long response!
Post # 26
I haven’t changed my last name. I think it’s hard for me to part away from my last name which has been with me for all my life. I assume I will change it in the future but I’m not in a hurry.
Post # 27
I’m in the same boat as Cupcake. It’s been almost a year but I have been too darn lazy to change my name. I identify myself as his last name, but on legal/financial/etc. documents I’m still my maiden name. Maybe I will get around to it before our anniversary!
Post # 28
We’re both hyphanating. Actually- he’s now in the process of changing his name legally to our new hyphanted name. Then when we’re married I’ll be "taking" his new MYLast-HISLast hyphanted bit.
Post # 29
It took me forever to change my name. I was just so lazy. It’s still not changed on my license. I dropped my maiden name all together. Having it as my middle name sounded goofy. I love sharing a last name with my husband, like Mrs. Sea Breeze it makes me feel married.