(Closed) Did you choose any of your bridesmaids strictly out of obligation?

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 17
Member
2432 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

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@gelaine22:  It’s terrible! I hate the expectation that just because you happen to be biological siblings, there is an expectation that your sisters will be included in your wedding.

UGH. Family drama. Hate it!

Post # 18
Member
624 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

3 out of 4 bridesmaids.  All related to me.  lol

Post # 19
Member
8684 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

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@MrsEdamame:  I couldnt agree more! My sister and I are like night and day.

Post # 20
Member
847 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

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@HisToots:  The SO’s of those groomsmen sound crazy. 

Post # 21
Member
168 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

Unfortunately, yes. Upon becoming engaged my mother informed me that I may either have my sister (whom I do not get along with) as my maid of honor, or I may not have a maid of honor. Yay…. 

Post # 22
Member
238 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

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@BridieBea:  Yea, one is for sure. The other has good reason to be! lol

 

Post # 23
Member
881 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Most of my bridal party is obligatory

Post # 24
Member
63 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

my step sister is my Maid/Matron of Honor… not by choice…i hate it Undecided

Post # 25
Member
605 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2014 - Brazil Room

Ugh for my first wedding they were ALL obligatory. My sister told me that she would never speak to me again and I would never see my nieces again if she wasn’t a bridesmaid. She was a terrible pain and an embarassment the whole way through. Even went as far as both her and her husband cussing me out in the bridal salon because I wanted her to wear an appropriate sized dress.

The other two were my ex’s sisters. I didn’t want to include friends because at the time I had a toxic friend who would’ve been impossible if I had excluded her and included friends I actually wanted to be there.

This time, I have my two best friends, my FI’s female friend, and my cousin’s wife (who I all like). I had to stretch it though because Fiance wants 4 – 5 groomsmen and we need to keep our numbers coordinated. No idea who I’d pick if he wants a 5th… but definitely not my sister again!

Post # 26
Member
89 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

I just had to pick my SIL today and I’m so pissed. This is after I had already selected my four bridesmaids and after I had bought them presents. According to her “its HER brother, so she is entitled to be asked”. The dumb thing is that we will have to pay for everything for her because she is 22 and a single mother of two kids that she can’t even afford to take care off. I guess that is my rant for the day

Post # 27
Member
811 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I also had to pick my SIL 🙁 which sucks because we aren’t close and I have to pay for everything because shes a student and doesn’t make a lot of money. Oddly enough shes still complaining about the amount of work she has to put in (which is basically nothing) Soooo annoying

 

Post # 28
Member
329 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I asked my SIL because DH wanted me to.  And unlike most of the stories here, it actually wasn’t a bad thing; I think we’re closer now as a result. She never really bothered trying to get close to me before DH proposed, I guess she didn’t want to get close with someone who wouldn’t stick around.  Once we asked her to be in the wedding, she actually really stepped up with the help; she’s one of the most organized people I’ve ever met, and that melted into all the planning for the shower and everything, plus she was a HUGE help with the enormous guest list. She was the one to talk me down when his family decided to commandeer the guest list, which was great because she understood it in a way no one else really did (their family is straight crazy). 

She was there every step of the way, although she did have to skip the bach party because she was really sick.  The day of the wedding she almost came to fisticuffs with one of my other BM’s, but I’m pretty convinced the blame for that falls more on my friend than SIL, and to be fair, we were all starving at that point, so it could’ve happened with anyone. 

And now we’re definitely closer than we were.  We don’t always get along or see eye to eye, but overall I’m really glad she was in the wedding, and I’d do it again in a heartbeat.

Post # 29
Member
1789 posts
Buzzing bee

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@MrsEdamame:  Ohh lordy. 30s and acting like that? Some people have no class. I’d delete her too!!

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@MiSsyK:  Hope it works out!

 

Post # 30
Member
180 posts
Blushing bee

My sister. We’re not close and though I adore her (she’s my big sis and she’s awesome) she tends to make me feel like something she stepped on and is desperately trying to scrape off her shoe.

When we watch SYTD, Mom gets all teary because she’s worried I’ll be too bitchy to include my sister in the bridal party but I’ve promised she will have a spot in my wedding (even though Mom’s not paying for the event at all). She’ll be in the wedding party out of obligation but I’d really rather her not be in it at all (considering she’s like kryptonite for my self esteem) she won’t be Maid/Matron of Honor and I’m hoping that my other bridesmaids will make up for her horrible effect on my mood, though it’ll be a small wedding and I doubt there will be enough of them for the task.

Unless I end up eloping, or getting married over seas (both of which are possiblities) and she can’t make it (or I can get away with saying I forgot to ask).

 

Post # 31
Member
192 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

Yes my Future Sister-In-Law. To quote Julia Roberts famous line ‘Big mistake. Huge.’

 

 

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