(Closed) Did you feel obligated to have family members in your bridal party.

posted 7 years ago in Family
Post # 32
Member
1723 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 1998

Yes – but in my situation, it meant picking my SIL, Future Sister-In-Law, and my cousin’s wife (who is, of the 3, the only one I’m friends with). I didn’t want a whole gang of people standing up there. Honestly, I think the wedding party is basically useless – it’s a kind gesture, but unless you’re going for all the bells and whistles, they don’t really do that much.

I skipped the wedding party. It was a great decision and resulted in very little drama. My Future Mother-In-Law did ask my husband behind my back what was ‘wrong’ and why I wasn’t picking a wedding party (i.e., “Why isn’t she asking my beloved daughter to be her Maid of Honor?”). Uh, your daughter is an attention-seeking drama whore and I can’t stand dealing with her. In less cruel language, “Because I want to be fair to everyone and we want to keep the wedding small…”

As the wedding grew closer, I felt ‘vibes’ coming from his family and contacted my Future Sister-In-Law directly to explain my decision. She did surprise me with, “I don’t blame you for not having a wedding party. Means you’re smart.” Though I dislike her, I can at least give her credit where credit is due. That was big of her. 

 

Post # 33
Member
350 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I got engaged shortly before christmas, and saw my twin sister during our family christmas party.  She said “So am I in the wedding party?” I hadn’t asked anyone yet and ended up sighing and saying yes.

When I got home I asked my Maid/Matron of Honor over facebook…LOL…

I text messaged my friend in calgary….

Then when I saw my DH’s sister for their christmas celebration I asked her.  

Post # 34
Member
1399 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

View original reply
@DelilahDiamond:  I’m sorry you have to go through that – this makes me angry for you

Post # 35
Member
1399 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

Thank god for being an only child.

I’m not having a bridal party and nobody bothered to bully me about putting cousins or FSIL’s in my wedding because they know they would get nowhere with me.

My FI’s sister is a doll but I don’t want bridesmaids.

Post # 36
Member
341 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I do feel somewhat obligated. But that doesn’t mean they are in the wedding Wink

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