(Closed) Did you Fi ask you dad for your hand?

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Did your fiance ask your father for your hand in marriage?
    Yes : (486 votes)
    64 %
    No : (274 votes)
    36 %
    I don't know : (3 votes)
    0 %
  • Post # 152
    Member
    337 posts
    Helper bee

    I put yes, but he asked my mom. My dad is kinda out of the picture, and I even told Fiance that I didn’t care if he asked my dad, but my mom was more important. My dad would have said yes, but I didn’t want to include him for many reasons. Overall it wasn’t a secret and I even had to remind Fiance to talk to my mom, but it was sweet, because he was planning on talking to one or both of my parents before he proposed ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 153
    Member
    33 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    Fi and I had decieded beforehand but In true Italian fashion, we were eating veal sandwhiches with my family when he asked my Dad. It was sort of hilarious.

    Post # 154
    Member
    65 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    My fiance asked my father if the timing was alright because he wanted to propose in front of everyone at my dad’s retirement party. Neither of them have told me how the conversation went.

    I’m glad he didn’t ask my mother because it was great to watch her cry ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 155
    Member
    200 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I wish mine had!  He didn’t, in fact, he seemed confused as to why he would have.  Somehow, I don’t think that he knew that this was a traditional thing that was done.  Oh well.  It’s funny, because for the next year or so after we got engaged, at every opportunity he could, my father would say “yep, he’s the guy that  never even asked my permission to propose to my daughter!”.  Of course, he always said it with a big smile on his face, teasing Fiance. 

    Post # 156
    Member
    8 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    My Fiance did ask my dad, but I think it was more of a formality since he had already purchased the ring!  Even though it’s old-fashioned, I think it’s a nice thing to do.  I know that it meant a lot to my mom and dad, and it was a nice bonding moment for them.

    Post # 157
    Member
    979 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    My Fiance did.. we all went out to dinner (parents, Fiance, and I) and then my mom and I dropped them off at a local bar where they had “the talk”.  They got smashed, I had to pick them up and drive them home later, and my dad called Fiance by my ex-boyfriend’s name. Oy! At least their names are really similar, if that makes it any better? haha

    Post # 158
    Member
    9129 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

    He showed up at my parents’ house in a suit (very out of character) with flowers – my mom made some joke about him coming from a funeral but looking happy anyway.  We’ve been together forever and he has been part of the family for ages, but it was still so special to me and to them that he asked them for their blessing.

    Post # 159
    Member
    125 posts
    Blushing bee

    No way. I would have been really offended.

    Post # 160
    Member
    730 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    @allieluvs21:  He asked my mom. She wears the pants lol

    Post # 161
    Member
    9825 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2019

    my Fiance did ask my dad, and at first he said No! But that was because he thought of engagements as only being about a year long, but once he understood we wanted a longer engagement and said that we should live together for a year or two first, he gave us his blessing. I was in my room, my Fiance went up to ask my Dad, Mum overheard and apparently ran into the room and said YES! before my Dad even answered lol

    Post # 162
    Member
    837 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    No, he didn’t ask. My relationship with my father is horrendous on bad days, non-existent on good ones. If he had gone to my father for any reason (blessing, persmission), it would have shown a complete lack of respect for my feelings toward my father and total lack of understanding for the situation. I would have said no. But he does know me, and so asked me. 

    Post # 163
    Member
    575 posts
    Busy bee

    He asked my dad when we were at a Christmas party. He didn’t ask for “my hand,” he asked to become part of the family, and promised my dad that he would cherish and love me for the rest of his life. They were standing about 10 feet away from me at the time and I had no clue what they were talking about. Sneaky boys!

    Post # 164
    Member
    310 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    Mine did not–my dad did not say no as he actually gave us a lecture when he first met him about how we should wait until our 30s to get married like he and my mom did (even though they’re divorced). The proposal was bittersweet because I was visiting my fiance and his whole family knew we were engaged…I didn’t tell my parents but I also didn’t hide the ring. They didn’t seem to notice it.

    Post # 165
    Member
    94 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Yes, my fiance did ask my dad (it’s really mom and dad since they were together in the living room) before he propose to me that weekend.

    (Fiance actually did it all on his own…He’s very traditional…so..that’s nice of him to ask my parents for blessing~~ )

    My fiance actually bought my dad an iPad a week before he asks for my hand in marriage and reminded my dad “Uncle…I bought you an iPad 3 last week…” LOL — He said the iPad was part of his plan….So…technically…my dad “sold me off” for an iPad 3…LOL

    Post # 166
    Member
    779 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Mine asked my Dad too. ๐Ÿ™‚ They’re like twins anyway, it’s kind of creepy.

    They were working on the car together, as always, and he said he asked my Dad and my Dad said he would be proud to have his daughter marry someone like him and shook his hand.

    I found this incredibly cute. ๐Ÿ™‚ lol, pretty sure my Dads just happy one of his girls got married to a guy who likes cars like he does.. haha

    Apparently though my Mom was sort of upset my Fiance didn’t ask her too. She’s kind of insanely involved. And my parents are split up, so it’s this super intense competition.. well, just on her side.

    Yeah. Super fun.Undecided

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