Post # 62
No, our families are very…different. He and my father didn’t get along at first and at the time I wasn’t even getting along with my dad.
They get along great now and if they were this close back then, he would have asked.
Post # 63
Nope. When I told my parents we were engaged my dad made a crack about missing the email asking for my hand. I mentioned it to my husband, he said, “Yeah, I didn’t do that.”
If he had an actual problem with it, he never said anything.
Post # 64
@otto2008: I am glad to see a man who feels this way! I wasn’t big on the ask your father/have dad walk down the aisle stuff. Honestly I had a hard time with the whole marriage thing mainly because I felt it had this stigma of “women as property”. It took a loong time for us to finally decide on marriage. After we did, he went to my father and asked for permission. We already set a date, I would have married him regardless, but Fiance thought it would make my dad happy/respect him more. I was fine with it because whatever we were already engaged. I was planning on walking down the aisle alone, but Fiance convinced me to have my Dad walk with me. He basically said he thought it would mean alot to my father and I guess that’s the most important thing. I know I’m not property. Fiance respects me and doesn’t think of me that way. I guess I’m more laid back about things as I get older. I still won’t take his name though. That’s too far for me. 🙂
Post # 65
@otto2008: My fiance “asked” my dad but it was really more like letting him know he was going to do it and he only did it because I asked him to. They had a nice chat about us and our relationship and SO told dad that he was planning to ask me soon. Dad was excited. At some point dad asked “So are you asking for my blessing?” but it was kind of a joke at that point because it was really clear that dad was very excited about us getting married.
I think it’s a somewhat silly tradition but it is a bonding experience for the intended and the parents. Really, most wedding traditions are silly, so are you not going to let her dad walk her down the aisle? Should she not wear a white dress or carry flowers? Are you not going to have a best man? All of these traditions have something to do with the woman as property or her normally smelling or looking bad.