(Closed) Did you find that special someone later in life?

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
423 posts
Helper bee

@esplanfreedom:  I’m 30 and I recently broke off my engagement (and ended the relationship). I certainly hope there are lot more fish in the sea. My cousin got married when she was 30, and 8 years later she has conceived (she didn’t have any problems conceiving, she just wasn’t ready for it). So now she’s a happy, healthy 38 year-old mother-to-be. I’m sure you won’t have any problem getting married or having babies. Women are doing it more and more these days – delaying marriage/parenthood for a career etc. Chin up, sister.

Post # 4
Member
1750 posts
Buzzing bee

@esplanfreedom:  I broke off my engagement for the same reason. It took me over a year to date again. I have been haiving fun with it, I’m just getting to the point where I am ready for a serious relationship again. I feel good about it, I’m 32. 

Post # 5
Member
11273 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2012

i didn’t meet the man of my dreams until i was 42.

i had been in numerous other relationships but just never felt ready or that they were “the one”.

Post # 6
Member
1059 posts
Bumble bee

Just wanted to say I hope all you find your happy forever! =) A friend of mine met her SO at 32 and was engaged a month later – somehow it just seemed right for them. She’s now 35 and expecting her first baby in a week!

Post # 7
Member
499 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Yeah, there is no timeline for life. I just got married and I’m 34, my brother and his wife got married for the first time each at 44. Better to be sure than be in a miserable relationship.

Post # 8
Member
2411 posts
Buzzing bee

Keep your chin up, OP. Your turn will come.

When I was 34, I ended a relationship for reasons similar to yours — I thought he was the one, but he wasn’t committing for the long haul or moving the relationship forward.

Little did I know I would end up waiting another 14 years to finally find my Darling Husband. I was 48.  So yes, I missed having kids. That didn’t upset me too much because I never really had a burning desire to have kids. I was much more bothered by the fact that it took me sooo long to find “the one.”

The wait was worth it, though. My Darling Husband is pure gold, he is the best man I’ve ever known and he treats me like a queen.

I used to look at women around me, friends and family who are happily married for the most part. Many of them have found very, very nice husbands who are amazing men. For years, I was convinced that I would never find a husband as nice as theirs.

But now that Darling Husband and I are almost three years in, I see that my marriage is much stronger and more solid than theirs. We are the most compatible couple I have ever known. We never fight, we cherish each other every day, and we have nothing but fun when we are together. On a daily basis, we remind each other that we are grateful to be together.

I have a dream marriage that I never thought could be possible at this late stage in life.

Don’t lose hope and don’t give up! And most of all, don’t settle for someone because of your biological clock. It is a sweet, sweet feeling to be perfectly matched with the love of your life. Keep your standards high.

Post # 9
Member
11752 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Yes you absolutely can and wil find someone later in life!  While I’m younger than you, I figured I would offer this story anyways if it would help you – A family friend of mine was never one to settle down – always jumping from bf to bf. We thought she would never get married.  But at 45 she finally settled down and got married.  At 46 almost 47 she had her first child – a perfectly happy and healthy little girl!

Post # 10
Member
1465 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I read all the postings and agree with you all. I am sorry that you had to leave a relationship that you thought would lead to marriage and children.

I got pregnant at the age of 21 and had my daughter I was not married and decided to raise her on my own. To be honest I never thought about being married. Over the years I met , dated, and eventually was proposed to a total of 5 times. I never felt the love I thought I deserved and agreed but eventually called off the weddings.

Long story short an opportunity came for me to adopt my niece she was 2wks old and my biological daughter was 11years old at the time.  I dont regret being a single parents they are two beautiful educated young women 27 and 19. I really didnt give being married any thought to be honest but I met a wonderful man that really truly understands me for the first time in my life I want to marry him.

He asked me to marry him 2 months after we started dating. I am 48 and he is 49 and what we found was our birthdays are days apart mine is July 23rd and his July 24th. We are happy and have so much in common “his philosophy is a happy wife is a happy life”. He treat me like a queen and making me happy makes him happy. I am so glad I waited because our relationship is truly a quality one. 

There is no need to be concerned it will happen and it will be the best relationship you ever have. Why? because you didnt settle for just any kind of relationship you will have a quality one.

Post # 11
Member
4006 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I met me Fiance days before I turned 36. I’ll be 38 when we get married (he’ll be 37). A friend of mine got married for the first time at 41 and she just announced her pregnancy (wedding was in September). 

Post # 12
Member
3241 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I met my husband when I was 34, we were married at 40. As far as kids go, I don’t know if that will be in the cards or not. Given my age, probably not, but we’ll see what happens. There are times I wish we had met earlier, but things always work out for a reason. We are happy together and I can’t imagine spending my life with anyone else.

So to answer your question, yes you can find love later in life.

Post # 13
Member
11343 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

Never, ever, ever second guess your choice to get off the wrong path simply because you’re not yet certain where the new one is going. The fact is, you’re much closer to seeing your dream happen when your not in the wrong relationship than you ever were while still in one, no matter how long you dated.

I always wanted to get married and have a family. Always. However, I quickly found that God’s plans and timetable for my life were not the same as mine. Despite my having dated a number of people and having had several long-term relationships, including two guys who took me ring shopping and who both wanted to marry me, I didn’t meet a man whom I really wanted to marry until I was in my late 20s. We became engaged when I was 29 , and were supposed to be married when I was 30. Unfortunately, even though I really loved this guy and his entire family, and even though he and his entire family loved me and my family, and even though I was so excited to finally be getting married at the age of 30, I finally realized that my now-former Fiance and I were just not on the same path spiritually, despite us both being Christians. God revealed to my heart that He had another plan for my life (I had no idea what it was or how long I would have to wait for it to unfold), but I would just have to trust Him. So, as difficult as it was at the age of 30, I made the decision to break that engagement and cancel that wedding.

Like one of the prior posters, I had to wait a very long time for this plan to unfold. I didn’t meet my Darling Husband until I was almost 46, and we were married when I was 47. At that moment, my entire life changed in some very dramatic ways. I went from successful, single, career woman living in a major metro area to the wife of a senior pastor, stepmother of four, dog owner, stepmother-in-law, and not long after, (of course, still very young-looking and cool LOL!) grandmother to an incredibly beautiful, precious baby girl. Although I had to resign my job and sell my house and relocate to DH’s very small town in another state, and there were some major bumps of transition along the way, I now have a much richer life because of the many new roles and relationship with which God has now blessed me!

And, to address the other half of your original question, Darling Husband and I are still very open to having a baby together, if the Lord chooses to allow us to experience that wonderful blessing. It is still biologically possibe for us, despite my having had to have a number of GYN surgeries for fibroids and cysts over the years. We may not know what the future holds, but we absolutely know who holds our future!

I just wanted to write to encourage you — and perhaps some others — today! There is hope! 🙂

Post # 14
Member
901 posts
Busy bee

I met my Fiance when I was 33, almost 34 (am 34 now). I’ll be 35 when we’re married. We we set on getting married a few weeks into meeting each other. Just when I was at the point where I wondered if I was would ever meet someone that would be the one for me, I met my Fiance. It was like lightening struck. 

These things do happen, hon. Good for you for breaking off a less than ideal situation. You deserve true happiness.

One thing in your favor is that people in their 30’s are typically very marriage minded. Dating is a little different because, more often than not, people are seeking a future spouse. It feels a little more serious, but refreshing, like, ok, let’s get to the point already.

Post # 15
Member
8461 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

@esplanfreedom:  My FI’s cousin didn’t meet her husband until she was almost 37 (I think her husband is a year older than her), but they both wanted kids and a family.  Since they were both honest with each other about it, there was no pressure on “how to bring up kids/marriage”.  They got married about a year later, but basically were TTC as soon as they got engaged.  She got pregnant when she was 38 almost 39 and they have a beautiful daughter together.  I think they tried for another, but just couldn’t get pregnant.  They’ve talked about adopting another child, but I think with the way the economy is, they just can’t swing it.

Post # 16
Member
2854 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@BelliniChic:  Same here, I have a dream relationship (getting married in 6 months) with a dream man and although we had known each other over 20 years, we finally started dating when I was 46. 

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