(Closed) Did you go in debt over your wedding?

posted 4 years ago in Money
Post # 76
Member
382 posts
Helper bee

ashley01:  I personally wouldn’t have gone into debt, but then again, I am pretty bad on paying debts, hehe. Husband and I also didn’t want a big wedding, if anything, we would use the 2k savings we had. We were willing to go into debt for the honeymoon, but given the uncertainty in our future (we were moving out of the state, husband had no job yet, etc.) we decided it wasn’t a wise choice.

BUT, my parents, whom pay for the wedding because they DID want a big wedding (and our little 2k wedding was tossed aside), did go into debt (used credit card for paying the venue+catering) and I presume my in-laws also did (they wanted to have an open bar, which we didn’t, so they bought tons of wine bottles just so beverages wouldn’t ran off). I know for my parents going into debt was not a big deal as they could afford to pay it later (good works and good financial skills), and my in-laws simply didn’t care for another debt (husband says they are the “YOLO” type, and I have no clue if they have payed for the wine bottles or not). 

So, in the end, I think it all comes to two questions:

1) How important are those things you’re getting yourself into debt for? and 2) Can you afford to pay them in less than a year later?

If the answers are: Very important and Yes, then it is awesome and a quite mature decision (in my opinion)! But if you hesitate, then maybe you need to double check why.

Post # 77
Member
157 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2006

Nope. We had a really traditional wedding, our church was free for the ceremony, we were able to get a free building for the reception, and everything else we just made sure we were able to pay for outright… And I’m not sure how because I was 18 and he was 21. 😆 My wedding was beautiful and timeless and I was relieved and happy that there was no debt to deal with, for us it was the right decision. 🙂

Post # 78
Member
157 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2006

Also, for some perspective, where we live, big extravagant weddings don’t really happen. I can’t think of anyone that went into debt for their wedding. Most everyone gets married in their church, the popular rentals for receptions in the area are VERY reasonable. It’s just not a thing to spend $30,000 on a wedding around here. So that makes a difference I think! People tend to get married younger here too. 

Post # 79
Member
1256 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

ashley01:  No. I didn’t go into debt planning for my wedding. I did have help from my parents and my in-laws though. But if I didn’t have any help, I would’ve just gone to the court house and then have a small dinner reception at a local restaurant. 

Post # 80
Member
125 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

The only thing we will be putting on credit are our rings.  

Post # 81
Member
3114 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2016 - Surfer\'s Beach, Grand Cayman

Nope. We wouldn’t plan something we couldn’t afford. 

Post # 82
Member
532 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

We will likely borrow £10k or so. That’s not even a big wedding but food is expensive and a traditional wedding breakfast is the norm here. People expect my wedding to be extravagant as my sisters was and assume our dad will put on the same for me. He isn’t. I would prefer to cut our losses and elope but mil made a scene and FH says he can’t cope with the guilt of her not beinfg there. So debt it is. We will also save around 5k. 

Post # 83
Member
24 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2016

I don’t think this is a question you should pose to a bunch of strangers, as everyone has varying opinions. (such as: “NEVER ON YOUR FIRST BORN’S LIFE GO INTO WEDDING DEBT, ARE YOU STUPID?” etc). My fiance and I are paying for our wedding by ourselves, for the most part, and I HATED it when people would look at me dumbfounded and say: “you’re paying for your wedding yourself? Ugh, why don’t you just elope?”

If you’re comfortable taking on the debt, do it. If not, don’t. My fiance and I are going to have a smidgeon of debt after our wedding and honeymoon and we’re okay with that because it’s going to be the perfect day for both of us and we are going to pay it off quickly. 

My only suggestion would be that you actually calculate your day to day expenses and make sure that you will, in fact, be able to pay it off as quickly as you think you will. For example, if you are financing $6,000 on a 0% credit card, you would have to pay $3,000/ month for 2 months to actually pay it off. Can your lifestyle afford that? What you DON’T want is to mis-calculate your ability to actually pay the debt off, then turn $6,000 of weddign debt into $18,000 of credit card debt because interest accrued and you weren’t able to pay it off quickly. 

Best of luck to you and congratulations. 

Post # 84
Member
80 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

Not at this point. My father offered us a $5,000 for the wedding which is incredibly generous. We’re paying for the rest of the wedding and the honeymoon ourselves. All together it will be about $15k and between my dad’s help and our own money, we should be able to avoid any debt. Which is good, because my fiance has some student loan debt we’d like to tackle after the wedding. But of course I’m sure some last minute expenses we didn’t think of will pop up on the credit card. If thats the case, I will just use some of my savings to pay it off. I’m trying to avoid tapping into savings and paying as we go, but at the end of the day I’d rather use savings than have looming debt. 

Post # 85
Member
9 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2016

I actually had started a savings account for a kick ass 30th Birthday trip (Was going to rent a beach house and letting anyone who wanted to come stay for free) BUT once the boy and I became serious that became a windfall wedding fund. I Kept on saving and put all the windfall cash I came into in that fund and saving whatever I could. We ended up actually having enough to pay for the wedding…

But we also utilized our cash back credit cards (whenever the vendor didnt charge a CC service fee)  and paid them off as the charges came in.  That cash back almost paid for my wedding dress, thanks 5% cash back on Amazon in the fall!

We are putting off our Honeymoon till next year to save up some cash again… we have been very lucky to pay it all off upfront!

  • This reply was modified 3 years, 7 months ago by  anathene.
Post # 86
Member
7 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2016

It doesnt seen like we will go into debt, our budget is 13000 and I am very closeto keeping it at 12000. But we lucked up, i didnt pay for my dress, our honeymoon is a timeshare, the venue is all inclusive and decor price was reasonable. My FH and I usually get a nice amout bact from taxes individually so we just put it towards the wedding (10k total) aside from that rest rest was covered in the wedding fund I contributed to every paycheck. It serious planning, but it going to be all that we dreamed it could be. We really all I want it to be, he would rather get married in the pastors office and go on the honeymoon skipping the reception. Sadly, that was never my dream wedding so 8-20 here we come.

Post # 87
Member
3966 posts
Honey bee

Debt stress is not the way you want to start your married life! I always think it’s important to live wthin you rmeans. I have a friend currently going into debt to fund her son’s lavish wedding. I lost sympathy when he decided he wanted (and will have) a Versace suit for his big day ( starting price $2000!!!).  Crazy!

Post # 88
Member
13702 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

No, I wouldn’t go into debt over a fancy party.  All it costs to get married is the cost of the marriage license, and maybe a fee to the city clerk.  Everything else is just extras.  Going into debt for a party sounds absurd to me.

Post # 89
Member
2119 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

ashley01:  no we def didnt go into debt. my mother owed me some money and i told her if she could help out with like 3000 and we would call it good. my Brother-In-Law helped wtih some flowers even though i didnt really even want them. i just figured they are so expensive and die, plus it was kind of a destination type of wedding (same state different town). as a gift my Brother-In-Law and brother payed for the DJ. other then that we payed for everything. open bar and heavy apps. we stayed at a B&B for a few nights after then headed home and back to work. a year later we were able to save up for a honeymoon, hit up disney world, stayed in coco beach, watched a football game in miami, then stopped in oregon to see both grandmas. overall a three week honeymoon. we were engaged for a while year and we able to save for the wedding.

Post # 90
Member
18 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2015

 

ashley01:  The absolute only thing I put on a CC was my wedding dress. Everything else we paid upfront. We saved for over a year, and we didn’t have a big wedding. (Think under $9K) I couldn’t imagine spending so much. We even thought about eloping for the sake of saving the money. Backyard weddings are not meant to be over budget. Maybe there’s a few things you can cut out? Or maybe you could put it on CC but be careful how much over budget you do decide to go. Set an absolute, red flag, NO WAY JOSE NOT CROSSING THAT AMOUNT, limit. After the wedding you don’t want to keep thinking about paying back all that money. 

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