(Closed) Did you go in debt over your wedding?

posted 4 years ago in Money
Post # 91
Member
1204 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

I know I’m going to get a lot of flack for this, but…

I find it interesting that most people are saying “Never would I go into debt for my wedding!” when in reality, many probably have student loans or car payments to make every month. IMO, if you paid upfront for your wedding when the money could have gone towards paying off other debts, you chose debt for your wedding!

(And yes, the above applies to me, as I have student loans.)

Post # 93
Member
1811 posts
Buzzing bee

Yup, we did. $4000. <cue scary music>

We saved the remaining $26K ourselves. The $4000 closed the gap on our ideal wedding and guess what? We don’t regret it a bit. Just like I don’t regret the student loans I’m paying off because the education was worth it. Just like I don’t regret mortgage payments because I enjoy the benefits of homeownership.

Your choice of financing is as personal as a wedding itself. So if paying an interest rate can be fit into your budget (ideally comfortably) and it is the difference in between regret and no regret–by all means…charge. There is no one-size-fits-all method through this thing called life–in which a wedding is a major milestone worthy of a little out-of-the-ordinary.

Post # 94
Member
515 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2016

Gosh no. We have been engaged for 2 years and have been saving ever since. Wedding was paid off around the fall and now anything else is just extra money. We’ll be using credit cards to pay for things so we can get points but it will be paid off with the money we saved specifically for the wedding.

Post # 95
Member
27 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2016

It would be interesting to hear where all of these weddings are taking place! I’m getting married in Los Angeles and I’ve found that it’s not cheap to have a *nice* wedding here!! But again, it all comes down what you consider *nice* and also your wedding priorities

We paid some vendors with cash, put specific things on credit and did a mix of both on others. We also received a few wedding gifts from parents (wedding party clothing paid, bridal shower from Future Mother-In-Law paid). I figure that we’re getting married once, we want a  wedding we love and we will pay what is necessary to get that. The wedding, including engagement ring is coming in around $40,000. And I don’t regret any of it!

  • This reply was modified 3 years, 7 months ago by  norieganups.
Post # 96
Member
400 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

Not directly, but as a PP mentions we do have student loan debt and we’re paying cash towards the wedding instead of towards those loans so *shrug*. I’m actually very thankful for the wedding because it’s turned us into awesome savers 🙂 

At the end of the day, 6k of debt with a realistic plan to pay it off in a few months is not the end of the world nor will it sink you. I also think it’s kind of unfair for people who were able to have the exact wedding they wanted (often with help from their families) to claim they would have eloped/gone to city hall/whatever if they couldn’t afford it upfront themselves… That’s REALLY easy to say when you’re never actually going to be faced with that choice, I’m sure.

Post # 97
Member
22 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: February 2016

Luckily not. My husband and I had a long engagement and therefore had a chance to plan and save up for the wedding and honeymoon. And the fact that we both lived with our parents prior the wedding (we both came from a traditional Asian households) – we managed to save up tremendously. 

Also my brother in law recently got married, so we took that as an advantage.. He happily referred us to many of his suppliers and we managed to get lower price. We were also lucky enough to go to church where we know people who does photography, video, wedding cake and our pastor was more than happy to run and officiate the ceremony. Again, that was a plus. 

Post # 98
Member
3169 posts
Sugar bee

lightchaser:  I think the question is worded in a way that implies it’s asking whether you created more debt or not. So I would say if a poster was still meeting min repayments and then some they could say they didnt create more debt. If they had a debt reduction strategy that was severely impacted that is different. I like seeing this point of view though and can definitely see where you and other posters are coming from. Car versus a wedding is one bad debt versus another

Not being defensive or anything, just pondering

Post # 99
Member
3169 posts
Sugar bee

glitters:  I was one of the people who said this and I assure you, i didn’t have the exact wedding I wanted because I legit would have eloped of gone to city hall. But I def agree there’s no harm in a small amount of manageable debt. Weddings are so personal, and that extends to the budget. I hope you have a ball at your wedding! 

Post # 100
Member
1480 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

ashley01:  We went into debt for our wedding. It’s complicated, but basically my dad had agreed to pay for certain items of the wedding and we would pay for the rest. About a month before the wedding (when final payments were due), he said “nevermind.” We had already paid our part in full and had to come up with upwards of $15k in a month. We had to put $8k on a credit card because of that. 

For what it’s worth, I didn’t want a big wedding – my dad and Darling Husband did. I would have been happy spending what we spent on our honeymoon and used that as an elopement, and now Darling Husband agrees lol. At least it’s a 0% interest card for 18 months, and will be paid off in that time. Sometimes shit happens. I do recommend planning a wedding that YOU want/can afford comfortably though. If we had known what would’ve happened we would have been able to save more than we did and wouldn’t have gone into debt over it.

Post # 101
Member
2 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: November 2014

I strongly recommend against going into debt or spending  money in savings (unless you’re positive it can be replenished quickly…like in the next 3-6 months).  

Had it not been for both of our families, who desired and contributed the  majority of the funds for our wedding, we would’ve chosen something small, meaningful, and within our means to pay for without going into debt or dipping into savings. Also, if the latter had been the case, we probably would’ve had a brunch or two afterwards in order to include close family & friends in celebrating with us. That way no one misses out, and there’s less chance of regretful spending 🙂

Congratulations and best of luck whichever way you decide to go!

P.S. I actually wanted a small wedding/elopement and would’ve been happy either way.

  • This reply was modified 3 years, 7 months ago by  MJZ5.
Post # 102
Member
270 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

The problem is the wedding industry has become monopolize and majority of brides don’t know the true rates that vendors charge outside of weddings. My fiance and I haved worked in the arts so we are very familiar with the costs of most events and rates of vendored jobs. (ex: photographers who want to charge Terry Richardson rates, lol)

The fact that we have to scrape, save, etc. to have a special event is ridiculous. $30k-$40k is a house downpayment. A year of tuition to pay off/grad school tuition. So many more things with longeivity.If this is the only big moment you’ll have in life, I guess you can go for it…but if you know you have other big events in life to look forward to, I wouldn’t dare spend that much.

I live in West Hollywood and we’re doing a $10k wedding in Malibu…in 4 months. It’s been hard work but it’ll look amazing and I’m so proud of what we’ve been able to do. So anyone who says you have to spend a housedown payment on your wedding to make it nice, isn’t always right.

I am fortunate to have my fiance’s parents to have offered to pay for our wedding, but I still think think it’s unjust that vendors inflate prices based on the mention of a wedding.

  • This reply was modified 3 years, 7 months ago by  kaelasoul.
Post # 103
Member
2251 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

OMG! Never go into debt for a party!  A wedding is essentially a party! It’s silly to pay off  credit card debt for something like this.  Don’t have a wedding for 100 people  if you can only afford 15. We paid it all in cash and had zero debt after the event.  We have been saving money for years for this,  no regrets,  no residual bills.  I know a couple, who is  still years after their wedding,  paying off credit card debt from the wedding event.    They are divorced now. Very idiotic situation,  btw.

Post # 104
Member
395 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2016

It sounds like you have a plan to pay it off quickly, and I really hope you do, but for me I didn’t think it was worth going into debt for one day. I put everything that I could (as I do with most expenses) on a credit card to earn the points. My then fiance and I paid the credit card balance in cash by the end of the month.

I have Chateaubriand tastes on more like a T-bone steak budget, so I had to scale back my expectations a bit. I had to DIY some things and keep a tight guest list @ around 130, but I still managed to have a nice, elegant affair that in the end exceeded my expectations. I make a decent enough salary to where the husband and I could have had a really lavish affair if we took an additional year to pay it off, but it just wasn’t worth it. We are looking to purchase a new home in a year or so and would like to put down at least $60-$80 grand. We’d rather have the money go towards that- an investment in our future and family, also towards nice vacations and such. I don’t have any regrets. My wedding was beautiful and folks said it looked like it belonged in a magazine. Ultimately, it is an individual decision, but I wouldn’t want anyone to have undue stress trying to pay for a wedding.

Post # 105
Member
71 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2015 - caesars palace las vegas

Our wedding ceremony at Caesars Palace only cost $1300 and included the venue (insurance if it rained to go to an indoor chapel)… room for 120 guests (we only had 35)… it was a garden (ok so no flowers… just paper flowers for $100 that we reused and used as keepsakes)… free live music during ceremony… free minister (the best… its vegas! they do this all the time) and we went out to dinner (yep for 37 people… they accomodated us in the Caesars Palace Hotel that day… we just asked! and everyone paid for their dish)….

they let us take pics and our friends are photographers… they even filmed it and had no problem… they would make anyones dream come true at Caesars but we were simple and it was amazing! there are pics on my page!

The dress I got was on sale for $200 and i plan to donate or resel… we threw a small backyard party when we got home from vegas and had friends BBQ for everyone and free entertainment as a gift from a friend!

 

this left us with money for taking time off for our Honeymoon! which was important to me more so than a day long party BUT im different than most… we took off a month for the wedding and a month for the honeymoon when all was said and done… we are very lucky

in the end it was fun throwing a wedding and reception separately but less expensive and because we live in San Luis Obispo (aka wedding destination of california….) we didnt and couldnt afford to have it here (plus hotels are nuts here in summer) … vegas was the place and the backyard party was a blast and less stressful and easy to include everyone!

 

if a wedding is very important to you then i understand if you spend more and i think thats fine… for me, a vacation and our parents and loved ones having fun without breaking the bank was the most important. live your dream and do what you want in the end! follow what you like to do and have fun! money is just money in the end… even though im a cheap girl haha

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