(Closed) Did you have a break with FI to realize you were meant to be?

posted 8 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Did you have a break with FI to realize you were meant to be?
    yes : (32 votes)
    29 %
    no : (74 votes)
    67 %
    other : (5 votes)
    5 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    1075 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Yea…but it was always me that broke it off with him..then he would beg me back.  Just recently, he broke it off with me.  After that, that’s when I really realized that I couldn’t be without him and vise versa.  Ever since that, we have been doing so well.

    Post # 4
    Member
    941 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    yes. i tried to get away twice, actually. the second time i actually fessed up to kissing another man in my (now FI) bf’s hometown while i was gone visiting an old friend to try and make the break a little cleaner. i packed my things a few days later, moved out of our apartment and took my bed, and then had a total break down and realized that he was the best thing that ever happened to me. he fought for me the whole time.

     

    it took me only a few weeks to realize i was ready to spend the rest of my life with him. 5 months later we got serious about getting married.

    for me, it said a lot when we got back together not only once after i broke up with him, but twice. every other time i broke it off, it was for good!

    Post # 5
    Member
    4567 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    We honestly didn’t need a break. I don’t know… if I could have done that, because that just makes my heart hurt to think about, but I’m so glad it made your relationship stronger!

    Post # 6
    Member
    5263 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2012

    No, but we did go through a rough patch that really strengthened our relationship ultimately. I think, given different circumstances, we might have broken up for a short time. We’ve talked about it and we agree we would have gone back to each other. As it was, we found that spark that was worth holding onto and fought for it, which is essentially what couples who get back together do as well. 

    Post # 7
    Member
    5498 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: September 2010

    I voted other. lol. wqhen we first met, we dated for about a week before I broke up with him. I don’t remember why. But 6 months after that he swept me off my feet and we haven’t split since! = D

    Post # 8
    Member
    204 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2010 - Catholic Ceremony, Cultural Hall Reception

    I think that this is more common with people who start dating young, and date for a while before getting married.  Mr. P and I started dating at 19, and went out for 5 years before the proposal.  We broke up once or twice during this time.  I think it’s just frustrating to reach a point in a relationship and know that you’re just not mature enough to take it to the next level.  Does that make sense?

    Post # 9
    Member
    900 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    Yes.  I was pretty sure, but this is FI’s second marriage and he was a little nervous about getting married again (and having a kid in his early 40s).  We broke up last March after about 2 1/2 years.  I moved out and started dating other people.  We kept in contact and both just realized 100% that it was right to be together.  It’s a very comforting feeling right now to feel like we addressed most of our issues before even getting engaged.

    Fiance jokes that we got pre-divorced…

    Post # 10
    Member
    333 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2010

    Not with Fiance.  I had previously dated my college sweetheart for almost 8 years, and we broke up at least a haf dozen times, only to get back together, fight again, breakup, repeat.  When I finally decided I had to walk away (because he’d decided he never wanted kids), I met Fiance and after a year and half of dating and engagement, we have yet to have a fight.  It’s so easy, it makes me wonder what I was doing before!  As the others have said, when it’s right, it just feels right.

    Post # 11
    Member
    3344 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    No, but we had a couple of really rough times where I wanted to break up with him.

    Post # 12
    Member
    1523 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    We never fully broke up and took a break, but we were headed that way. We started dating right after college graduation. We clicked right away and had so much fun together, but his drinking kept coming up as a problem. Every month or so he would go out with friends and just get totally hammered. One time I did not hear from him for 18ish hours and it ended up that he took a sick day from work because he was hung over (and was not answering his phone). Another time he was trashed in front of a close friend of mine who he was meeting for the first time after spending some time with his guys friends. The final straw was him going to a wedding, then banging on my apartment door at 2 am trashed. I was pissed and he didn’t remember much the next morning.

    This all sounds awful and this behavior was horrible because he is such a good guy. After the wedding incident, I basically told him grow up or we are done. Lucky for both of us, he decided that he wanted to date me more than crazy partying. I think this experience really made us do some hard thinking early in the relationship as to whether we wanted to be together.

    Post # 13
    Member
    14186 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2009

    No. I don’t give second chances! I’m a meanie Wink Actually, we talked about this actually and he feels the same way.

    Post # 14
    Member
    7152 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2010

    NO, but I am glad that it worked for you ot make you closer.

    Post # 15
    Hostess
    16213 posts
    Honey Beekeeper

    We’ve never broken up or come close.

    But whatever it takes to help you know….it happens that way for a reason. 🙂

    Post # 16
    Member
    4465 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    We broke up for a whole summer after we had been together for a year.  He broke it off and I went along and did my own thing.  It drove him nuts that I wasn’t sitting at home crying and pining for him. 

    We ended up giving it another try at the end of the summer and stayed together for 6 more years.

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