Post # 1
Regular going anonymous because I am embarrassed, worried and desperately need unbiased opinions.
I bought a wedding dress. It looks lovely, and has many elements of what I wanted, but it is just not a ball gown. I settled and tried to convince myself that it’s what I want, but even though it is lovely, the worry lingers.
The dress purchased was not only purchased by my father but in the presence of my closest family. It has meaning… but it was impulsive, during my first and only bridal salon visit and under pressure. My wedding is now 6 months away, my original dress cost around $2,000, we are on a tighter budget and I fear I have waited too long.
Bees, have you purchased a second dress? What would you do in my situation?
Thanks for your thoughts. xx
Post # 2
anonymousgown : hi bee. This is a pretty normal thing to come up, so don’t feel bad. Can you post a picture of your dress?
If you want a ball gown look, tulle overskirt might work depending on your dress style. Some bees have done that, using the overskirt for the ceremony and pictures and taking it off for the reception- that way you’re still using the dress your dad bought you, but getting that ball gown feeling.
Post # 3
BalletParker : Thanks for your kindness. Below is my dress, front and back. Do you think an alterations specialist can take the extra tulle and turn it into a ballgown? I do love the look of the lace/beading almost dripping down into the tulle. My first Alterations appointment is on Tuesday. Have no idea what is possible. :/
Post # 4
It’s normal to second guess because there are so many options and we grow up with this idea that there is “the dress”. I got a cheaper dress around $250 that I loved when I tried on but started second guessing later. I kept the dress and wore it on my wedding day and it was beautiful and I felt beautiful. Reality is there is no such thing as “the dress”. You picked the dress you have because you loved it and felt beautiful in it. Rechannel that energy and remember that the day is about becoming one with your spouse not about the perfect dress. I LOVE lace dresses btw. I think the overskirt mentioned above will get you the look your looking for
Post # 5
Just wanted to duck in and say your dress is absolutely gorgeous!!!! I don’t know if I’d change a thing if I were you- it is really something!
Post # 6
anonymousgown : oh my gosh, your dress is gorgeous!!
I’m not an alterations specialist but since you already have tulle on the bottom, i’ll bet you could get an over skirt- at least it would flow, you could do the same lace dripping down, just up higher near your waist.
but your dress is stunning😍
Post # 7
Maybe I am just losing it, but feel it would look so much better if the tulle started at just above my belly button. Adding an overskirt is a good option I will have to try!
Post # 8
anonymousgown : Wow! Pretty! I agree that bringing the tulle up to above your belly/lower waist would make it perfect. Not sure it’s possible though.
Post # 9
Your father bought the dress and your family was involved in choosing it. In this case I say suck it up and wear the dress, make everyone happy. They’re invested emotionally and financially, you’re in too deep to pull out now.
Post # 10
since all these people have seen the dress and you didn’t pay for it yourself you’re more obligated to wear it that you might be otherwise…but perhaps if the budget allows you can wear something different for the reception?
preowned is the way to go if you are looking for savings. try on gowns in the shop and then look for them online.
Post # 11
Post # 12
Firstly, THAT DRESS IS AMAZING ON YOU!!! I do not blame you for impulse-purchasing at all.
I think that because everyone already saw it and your dad purchased it for you… You definitely have to wear it. That’s just my personal thoughts.
It sucks you’re second guessing but I think that’s normal and happens to many people! You could as others have said get a different dress for the reception, but that would probably not be a ballgown like you said you wanted. Or, alternately, this could be the reception dress (easier to move in than a ballgown) and you could do the overskirt for the wedding reception??
Post # 13
Did you try ballgowns on in the store? My figure is like yours, and so I thought the ballgown was going to highlight my waist the best, but when I tried them on, all of them sort of ate me up and make me look bigger than I was with all the skirt on the bottom (though maybe there was a way to remedy that). I ended up picking a more fitted gown just like you did (though mine’s a modified A-line/sheath/idk but it’s fitted! Lol) What makes you think you’re missing out by not having a ballgown? Does it not feel “bridal” enough? I bet if you tried on that lovely dress with all of the accessories, veil, and do your hair and makeup, you would feel differently!
Post # 14
That dress is so gorgeous on you!
Post # 15
I had literally the same experience. I bought a dress when my mother was in town right after I got engaged and I truly did have a bridal moment- but it was the only time I’d ever tried wedding dresses on and I got ahead of myself. I spent the next 8 months pining over exactly what I had envisioned for my wedding day since I was a little girl- looking like an angel on my wedding day. I went dress shopping alone and fell in love with a horsehair tulle layered skirt ballgown and bought a second dress. I am confident I made the right decision because I cant stop smiling when I picture wearing it on my wedding day. My mother had purchased my first dress so I am selling it to pay her back. If your heart isnt in love with the first dress anymore, thats okay!