- 5 years ago
Hi, I’m new. I’ve been stalking the boards, but this will be my first post. I would like some advice, and I thought I’d try all of you, since you are all so smart and helpful!
My SO and I are going to look at engagement rings this Saturday for the first time (yay!). He forwarded me an email from the design studio, which stated that the type of ring that I would prefer is about 20% more expensive than what he budgeted for.
My question is, would it be bad form if I offer to pay the difference for the ring? In other words, SO can contribute whatever he budgeted, and I would pay any incremental cost. I make a little more than my SO, so I generally contribute slightly more than half to the household, and I expect that once we start our lives together, I will likely continue to take on slightly more than half of the expenses, which we are both fine about.
I love my SO dearly, and I constantly tell him I don’t even need an engagement ring to move forward, but he insists. And I know he wants me to have the ring that I originally picked out, which, coincidently, is almost exactly what he was thinking of giving me. It’s just that it costs a little more than we expected, and I don’t want him to drain his savings over this. While I make a little more than SO, he is definitely a “man’s man,” so I know he wants the engagement to be traditional, although I do not care about these things.
Anyway, the point of this post is: are there any ladies here that contributed to their engagement ring? How did you handle the conversation, and how much percentage-wise did you contribute to the ring?
A little background on us. SO and I have been together for a year this month, and have been living together for two months. I just turned 33 and he will turn 31 early next year. Given my age and wanting to start a family, we are hoping to be married within the year. Also, we will likely have a modest (read cheap) wedding, and we both agreed that our money is better invested in our rings and buying property next year.
And for what it’s worth, yes, I’m ok with getting a ring within his budget and being done with the issue, but was just curious about whether other ladies have helped pay for their engagement rings and how they went about doing so.