(Closed) Did you invite your boss? Why or why not?

posted 4 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: What should I do?
    Invite your boss and plus one : (21 votes)
    64 %
    Do not invite your boss : (12 votes)
    36 %
    Invite the boss and the others on the management team : (0 votes)
  • Post # 2
    46667 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I did not invite my boss. We do not socialize outside of work so there was no way I was priorizing inviting her over other family and friends. I was inviting those closest to us as a couple, and on that basis alone she did not make the cut.

    I will add that I am a firm believer in separating work from personal life.

    Post # 3
    4162 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    In this situation, if you do have room to invite him and his gf, I would.  I don’t think he would be terribly upset if you didn’t invite him, simply because men tend not to care about these things.

    I invited my direct supervisor and then the provincial manager, each with a plus 1.  My direct supervisor RSVP’ed yes, but 2 days before told me she couldn’t attend anymore because her husband had ordered meat, and it was ready to be picked up on the day of my wedding.  Major eye roll.

    Post # 4
    2167 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2014


    MissLibra:  I also had a small wedding of less than 60 people. I invited my boss because we have a great working relationship and I genuinely wanted her there and thought she would enjoy being there. And she did. I also invited the three girls I am closest to at my office and their spouses. Everyone came and everyone had a great time. No one else at my office has had the nerve to call me out on not inviting them.

    Post # 5
    7524 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I did invite my boss.  I had worked for her for 9 years at that point and she had thrown me a baby shower at work and had always been very kind to me.  I was also fond of her husband who is a minister and had baptized my daughter.

    Post # 6
    8576 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2014

    I am inviting my boss, but my situation is very different as I have known him for a long, LONG time. Over 20 years! We are inviting my supervisors and any coworkers that I’ve known for a long time as well.

    My work place is like one big, dysfunctional family though, so it only seemed right.

    SO will be inviting both of his superiors, as well as a few co workers he considers friends.

    Post # 7
    1429 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2008 - Toronto, ON

    Well we invited 125 people so we had the extra space to invite my boss and his wife and so we did and they were very grateful to accept the invitation. I wasn’t going to invite them at first but I was in the lunch room and my boss’ wife who works in the shipping/receiving department for the company joked and asked where her invite was so I felt kind of obligated to invite them but I am glad I did, I also invited a few close co-workers as well. My boss and his wife gave us a toaster oven and a few other really nice gifts, so I was kind of glad I invited them! LOL It is really up to you and what you feel comfortable doing.

    Post # 8
    2457 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I invited my direct boss, but we are friends. We occasionally hang out outside of work and his wife and I get along great. We also invited two of the owners of the company we work for, but again, we are good friends with them and have hung out with them on many occasions. 

    Post # 9
    2571 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    MissLibra:  I did not invite my boss although I did invite a couple co-workers. One co-worker was someone that I socialized outside of work with, and the other co-worker actually introduced me to Darling Husband. I am friendly with my boss, however I know that he has an extremely busy schedule both in the office and outside the office. I felt that I would be imposing a burden upon him by inviting him to my wedding, hence I did not invite him. There were no hard feelings either.

    Post # 10
    2375 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    I did not invite my boss. Like it or not, people form an opinion of you even outside of work. For corporate social events, you still have to be mindful of your behavior. I didn’t want that on my mind during the wedding (I’m not planning on getting trashed or anything, but if I’m a little silly, I don’t want my boss seeing it)

    Post # 12
    260 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    MissLibra:  I am not inviting my boss. I have been at my organization for almost seven years – all of which he has been the president, and we are a small organization – but we are not particularly close. It’s always a tough call, and you never want to offend anyone, but the end of the day you have to do what’s right for you. We are having a decently large wedding (aiming for 180) but we are already over that number of invitees and can’t afford to invite every person both of us work with – so we each inviting a few key people on staff that we are close with (I know that goes against the all or nothing rule – but I am genuinely out of office friends with one person, and the other is my mentor.)

    So whatever you end up choosing will be right! (I just wouldn’t broadcast it to the rest of the team if you are only inviting your boss).

    Post # 13
    3844 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    I am super friendly with my boss, but she will not getting invited to my wedding. Additionally, I work in a branch of my office with one other girl. We are friendly with one another, but she is not getting invited, either. That being said, I am aiming for a smaller wedding (I would love 75 or under–but will be closer to 100) and they wouldn’t know anyone, so it would be a little awkward. 

    Post # 14
    1772 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    sounds like it’d work well to invite your boss & his gf, but nobody else from work.  your wedding is too small to feel bad about not inviting the others on the management team, so don’t feel bad at all.  My boss asked how big my wedding was, I told him 120 ppl max.  He said- oh that’s small, so it’s really just friends and family.  Then, luckily, a few mos later our rsvps worked out so that I could invite him and a few others I’m closer to at work.  He hasn’t said it explicitly, but I think he really likes that I invited him.  

    Nobody at work was expecting an invite because I had mentioned (whenever asked) how tough it was to even invite all of our relatives.  For a max 120 person wedding which we’re paying for on our own, we had at least 80 family members, add bridal party and SOs and you can barely invite your friends.  If you keep saying (whenever anybody else brings it up), that it’s so so hard b/c you can only invite 60 ppl, I think they’ll get it.

    Post # 15
    1243 posts
    Bumble bee

    I’m inviting my current and former bosses because they are beautiful human beings that has been my managesr through some of the hardest points in my life. While I’m not social with my current manager outside of work,  I’d like both of them present at this milestone. I truly think the world of them. 🙂

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