(Closed) Did you invite your officient to the reception

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
2958 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Wynn Las Vegas


Post # 4
354 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

No. She stayed for a bit at cocktail hour and then left. But we hired her as a civil celebrant, and had no other personal relationship with her outside the business relationship. Some people invite ministers/priests/pastors/etc they have known their entire lives. If you don’t have that, no reason to invite her.

Post # 5
1348 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I did invite him to both the rehearsal dinner and the reception, he politely declined both. I even invited his wife to both, yet she was in bad health so she didnt come to anything. 


Post # 6
14494 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Yes we did and planned too whomever we hired. We ended up using a lady friend of my husband’s, we invited her girlfriend also.

Post # 7
117 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Yes we did.  We met with both our pastor and his wife several times prior to our wedding for “counseling.”  We love them both, and asked them to the rehearsal and reception dinners. 

Around here (WI), I think it is customary to invite your officiant to your reception dinner.  Many of them say the prayer before the meal.  I know that’s the traditional view, and by no means do I think it’s the final word on etiquette for this question.  Just giving you another viewpoint.  😉

Post # 8
444 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

We will probably be having two officiants (My pastor and his daughter who is also a pastor/leader), we will definitely be inviting them but I have known them my entire life and aside from being wonderful leaders they are like family to me so I would invite them anyway.  However if I didn’t know the person I’m not sure we would, maybe just out of courtesy.

Post # 9
3256 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Yes, as I have always understood this to be the standard practice.  He did not come; apparently it is rare for the priest to actually attend the reception.  He did at my sister’s wedding, but he was in from out of town, covering for the regular priest, so he probably was bored and had nothing better to do.

In our case, we had never met the priest before, and we were really upset with the parish where we got married because they pretty much made it a nightmare.  But we still invited him; it’s what you do.


Post # 10
7271 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

Yes, we invited my pastor (the officiant) and we actually invited DH’s priest as well as he also helped us prepare for the wedding. However, we have personal relationships with both.

Post # 11
2808 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

we will. our wedding will be officiated by a friend.

Post # 12
308 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

We invited our officiant and his wife to both the rehearsal dinner and the reception (According to Emily Post that is the proper etiquette, I dunno). He wasn’t able to come to either.

Post # 13
156 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Around here it is customary to invite the officient to the wedding, and unless the person has a personal relationship with you, it is customary for the person to decline. It’s just one of those things, haha. For us, we used a close friend of the family, so even had he not officiated the wedding he would have still been invited, so we did’t have to think about it. 

Post # 14
7901 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

We did.

It is proper etiquette to invite the officiant (and spouse). They generally decline.

Post # 15
2082 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@Luvinlife:  Yes, we invited ours but he declined.

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