(Closed) Did you know you're NOT supposed to bring gifts to the reception…

posted 9 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: I totally
    knew that it was an etiquette faux-pas. : (82 votes)
    34 %
    had no idea! Oops! : (100 votes)
    41 %
    I had no idea but would NEVER publicly admit it : (14 votes)
    6 %
    Cookies! : (47 votes)
    19 %
  • Post # 3
    676 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2013

    Well then, why are there always “gift” tables?

    Post # 4
    1797 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    Our venue provides a gift room to put all the gifts in…I dunno.


    Post # 5
    1314 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2011

    Does this include cards? If so…well, shit. My general rule for myself is that if I didn’t attend the shower to give an actual physical gift, I just bring a card with money to the reception.

    Post # 8
    1132 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    Honestly, I hope some of our guests bring actual gifts. I just love opening them!! 

    Post # 9
    7439 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

    As an Etiquette Snob… I must say this is one of those “grey” areas…

    Technically it is correct to send Wedding Gifts to the Bride’s Home (or that of her Parent’s… if they are Hosting) PRIOR to the Wedding

    BUT there are certainly regional / cultural customs where bringing Gifts and / or Cards to the Wedding itself is acceptable

    And in many places, more so if the Guests are coming from Out Of Town (which is WHY there are Gift Tables at Receptions)

    The RULES OF ETIQUETTE that I find that are less known in regards to Wedding Gifts are…

    1- They should NOT BE USED PRIOR to the Wedding (lots of offenders on that front)

    2- They should be RETURNED to the Giver, if the Wedding is Called Off

    Hope this helps,


    Post # 10
    4913 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    I had no idea until I read this post and honestly, I never noticed it before because in my circle, it’s always gifts at the shower, money in cards at the reception (and there’s always a gift box for that). 

    Post # 11
    1612 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I’ve always thought b and g just left someone in charge of collecting gifts.

    Post # 12
    5229 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

    It is not against etiquette to bring gifts to the wedding. Rather, it is simply preferred that you don’t, but it is NOT at all rude to bring the gift with you.

    Re: cards. That’s not a problem since those are easy to transport.

    Post # 13
    677 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    Yeah I found out the other day. Now I feel like a complete ass for choosing “ship to me!” Instead of the bride. I feel like even more of an ass for spending a crap ton of time picking out wrapping paper and corresponding bows then parading in the reception with my huge, beautifully wrapped box like I was some sort of domestic goddess. Now I know everyone was shaking their heads behind my back feeling sorry for the happy couple when they tried to figure out how the hell they were going to get my gift home 🙁

    Post # 15
    2153 posts
    Buzzing bee

    You are not meant to bring gifts to the actual wedding, as it burdens the couple in having to deal with them (which isn’t much of a gift).  Making them have to find transportation for them, and storage while they are on their Honeymoon can be difficult.

    Post # 16
    677 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @Tangled:  for ettiquette ignorant people like me 😉

    The topic ‘Did you know you're NOT supposed to bring gifts to the reception…’ is closed to new replies.

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