(Closed) Did you live together first?

posted 6 years ago in 20 Something
  • poll: Did you live together before getting married?
    No, waiting for marriage to move in together : (41 votes)
    10 %
    No, waiting for marriage to move in together and have sex : (26 votes)
    6 %
    Yes, living together : (327 votes)
    81 %
    Other : (9 votes)
    2 %
  • Post # 3
    1348 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: January 2014

    Hi =) welcome!

    FH and I have been together for nearly 5 years, and have been living together for nearly 4.5. We’ll be getting married in 2014 also, on our 6 year anniversary =D

    Post # 4
    5011 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2012

    We lived together before we got engaged and I wouldn’t have marrued him without living together. There’s a big learning curve in living together and couples can find they’re incompatible at that point. I wouldn’t have wanted to deal with that AFTER  getting married.

    We waited for sex even less, but that’s a whole other story.

    Why are you waiting until you’re married if not for religious reasons?

    Post # 6
    113 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I was 18 and he was 22. Well we meet online so when he meet me he lived with me an thats also when we got engaged lol I don’t think I would be comfortable marrying a man I haven’t lived with (if even briefly) 

    Post # 7
    1406 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    I lived with Darling Husband before we were married but I had been married before and didn’t see the point in waiting.  I personally think it helped us figure things out.

    With my exH, I was young and still in college and my parents refused to pay for college if I lived with him.  So I didn’t and we had a super long engagement….and since we were both so busy with school, we saw each other only a couple of times a week.  

    I moved in right after we got married and we fought like cats and dogs for at least 4 months.  We’d both been on our own for so long it was hard to have someone else around.  We both would do anything we could to not have to go home….stay late at work, running errands, shopping, etc.  Do I think our problems were b/c we waited to live together until after marriage?  I honestly don’t know….he was more of my best friend and never really a husband though….which I didn’t know there was a difference until Darling Husband and I got married.  

    Post # 8
    9648 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2019

    I voted for other as we are not married yet and don’t live together yet but we do plan on living together before we get married πŸ™‚

    Post # 9
    1975 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    Of course!! Fiance moved in about 3 months into dating, we were both 20 years old

    Post # 10
    1284 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I am personally against waiting untli marriage to figure both of those things out. I think that living with someone can be very hard and that it’s beneficial to know what you’re getting into there. 

    Darling Husband and I dated briefing in high school about seven years ago. We then remained friends and each dated others for a while. We dated a year and a half before getting engaged and lived together a good portion of that. When we got married we had been dating two and a half years. 

    Post # 11
    11234 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013

    We’ve been together for 4 years (and best friends before that for 2.5 years), living together for 2, engaged since February, getting married next August. We are currently 26 and 30.

    I would never, ever marry someone that I hadn’t lived with for at least a year. Then again, I also wouldn’t marry someone I’d been with for less than 2. 

    Post # 12
    4014 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    Fiance and starting living together about a year into dating and I wouldnt have it any other way. There’s no way I could marry someone who I haven’t shared space with, it can be a total game changer. We will be married after being together 4 1/2 years next October!

    Post # 13
    170 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    We’ve been dating 10 years (I am 27 now) and we start living together 1 year ago, 10 moths begore getting married.

    We have the house and we don’t want to wait till the wedding, and it was the best decision I made.

    Living with your fi or husband is the most amazing thing, but also the fisrt days are a little strange. And it takes to me about 2 months to get used to that (house work (and he helps me a lot) hausehold economy, food/drinks purchase, not missing brothers/parents etc). Considering that marriage is a big stape, and that you are going to spend many busy months with all preparations and stress, I think starting living together just before the wedding is a big change. So it is good sometimes to start living some months or one year before to get used to that, not only for get used to live with him (this is for me te easy part) but also to get used to running a household. So then at the time you get married and return from the honeymoon you can just focus on enjoying your new life as husband and wife!

    Post # 14
    5423 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: November 2012

    We started living together after being engaged, but we were together 7 years before that happened.  It also took us about 5 months longer to find a house.  Had we not been together so long, I would choose not to get engaged quickly without living together.

    Post # 15
    13010 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    We live together.  In our area, rent is so high that we were throwing literally thousands of dollars away each month for two apartments, when we only used one.  We decided once both of our leases were up to move in together (2.5 years ago), and things have been perfect ever since!

    Post # 16
    170 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

      @MASPA:  I thoght exactly the same. You have been dating only months until you have been engaged, and I would be a good way to now more each other, living together before being married.


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