Post # 47
My Italian family is VERY generous so I do intend to “make a profit” but my parents are also paying for 98% of the wedding. Our family is similar to the Chinese culture comment. We also invited 366 people so I would generally expect to get more money. With my family, my parents would much rather throw a big party to celebrate then just give us the money outright because they know we will “make” the same amount of money either way, if that makes sense.
Post # 48
@Gerbera: Surprisingly, for a white girl from the midwest, I am pretty well versed on Chinese wedding culture. Maybe from living in China, haha. 🙂 Yeah, I’ve heard that, and I know a lot of Chinese friends who struggle to make ends meet because their friends are all getting married, and as newlyweds themselves, they have to give these insane gifts.
I guess in retrospect, we did that too, because I remember having my husband deposit all the checks and making sure it was right. Darned if I remember how much it was though, a few months later. It never crossed my mind to compare that number with the number we spent on our wedding.
I can see how others would. I was shocked at the generosity of our guests overall, and appreciated so much the love they showed us by celebrating with us, and by giving gifts. It all ends up the same place though – spent! Haha 🙂
Post # 49
Our wedding cost around $28,000 of which we paid $15,000 ourselves. We got about $7,500 in cash/checks.
Post # 50
Our wedding was about $8,000 total. We got about $3,000 in cash/gift cards.
Post # 51
We know how much cash we got because we had to know when we deposited in the bank – ours still has old fashioned deposit slips.
We received about $5000 in cash between my shower and the wedding. We also got about another $1000 worth of gift cards.
Our wedding cost $14,300 (not including rings or honeymoon) and our parents generously paid $5000 each, so WE made a profit, but it definitely didn’t offset the costs of the entire wedding.
Post # 52
I have never heard of making money from your wedding. It makes me feel dirty just to think about it.
Post # 53
We are making a lot happen with not a lot of money, so I wouldn’t be surprised if we made a good percentage back. Not that we expect it at all, but the older members of our families are known for their very generous donations to new couples.
Post # 54
Wow. This topic is a little shocking for me. A wedding is an outgo, not an income.
Post # 55
We didn’t think we would get so much, but I am pretty sure we at least got $4000 worth of things. We added up $3600 in checks and gift cards (mostly checks though) and we had sooo many things from our registry given to us. I would say we did pretty good, considering our wedding budget was only $6000!
Post # 56
It surprises me that so many people think negatively of “profiting” from weddings. Where I’m from, most couples do profit and it’s totally normal. Most wedding guests give monetary gifts with the sole intention of helping the couple start their lives together.
I see nothing wrong with profiting from your wedding and I would be lying if I said I didn’t hope to. I’m certainly not getting married for the gifts they are an added perk.
Post # 57
We discouraged gifts because we were having a Destination Wedding and already asking guests to spend $$ on travel, plus we are older/established and didn’t need a lot of new “stuff.” However, we did receive about $4,000 in cash and honeymoon registry gifts. (We had 75 guests.) We were honored, but that didn’t even come close to covering the wedding costs, nor did I expect it to.
Post # 58
We’re not having a wedding for the sole purpose of making money, but I do think it’s totally acceptable to believe your loved ones will bless your union with gifts and monetary donations to help you get started in your new married life.
Post # 59
Like some of the PPs in my circle it’s very common to give money only, or very few boxed gifts. Just to give you perspective, my family is Eastern European and my birthday happens to fall on a big family celebration. Since we don’t have a lot of family here it’s mostly close friends who are invited it’s usually about 40 guests (mostly couples). I have received close to a $1000 for several recent birthdays and I turned 27 this year. I realize this is over the top to some people (and I never expect any of it) but it’s just the way we do things!
That all being said I know that most people have covered their wedding with their cash gifts.
I have to add though that the breaking even/making a profit for some people in my circle may have to do with the “money shower”. I think it’s just so wrong. Not everyone does them but in the past year I have received 2 invitations that in some way or another requested money only.
Post # 60
I never actually thought about this. I try not to think about money stuff because my side of the family is fairly poor and FI’s entire family is wealthy. We’ll probably get some cash gifts but I’m not expecting too much. We’ve never lived together and are fresh out of college so I’m sure we’ll get stuff for our home…which I prefer!
Post # 61
My Italian family is very much like PP’s stated above and does keep track of gifts given. For thank you’s, and for reference in future events. My mom and aunts all have lists from their children’s milestone events through the years, baptisms, communions, confirmations, 1st bdays, etc.., with the gifts logged. It’s very much a cultural thing, although I can see how it would seem tacky, lol! We are doing a lot of DIY and hoping to spend under 8k, which is about half of a typical wedding in my area (oh those innocent days of yore when I thought I would get away with spending under 5…), so I assumme I will break even including the honeymoon. My family and our circle usually give cash and tend to give what is assumed will cover our plates. My brother had a similar sized wedding, 225 people, that was more expensive a couple of years ago. They broke even including their honeymoon and we have an almost identicle guest list.