(Closed) Did you sleep apart from FI the night before your wedding?

posted 6 years ago in Traditions
  • poll: Did you spend the night with your FI before the wedding?

    We slept apart and I slept fine

    We slept apart and I slept terrbily and was exhausted the next day

    We slept in the same bed and I'm really glad we did

    We slept in the same bed and I still couldn't sleep/wish we had been apart

  • Post # 16
    Member
    4909 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I spent the night before in the hotel with my bridal party. I loved it because it was really fun and special to have my closest friends with me – we stayed up crazy late talking, but adrenaline kept me going during the wedding day, so it was fine. DH stayed in the hotel room next door with a good friend of his – he was adament that he wasn’t supposed to see me on our wedding day until I walked down the aisle.

    Post # 17
    Member
    3416 posts
    Sugar bee

    We were already living together but we slept apart, mainly for logistical reasons. We wanted to stay in the hotel with everyone else the wedding night, so I stayed there the night before so that the bridesmaids and I could start doing hair/makeup and hang out the morning of the wedding. He stayed at our house, so that all of the groomsmen could come over the day of the wedding for pre-game. I slept terribly the night before the wedding but it was because I did not follow through with my plan of not drinking and going to bed early:)

    Post # 18
    Member
    4088 posts
    Honey bee

    View original reply
    lkknight:  We slept apart, me staying at home in bed and him staying with his sister. Our wedding wasn’t until 5pm the next day so it was convenient for him to be where he was to go golfing, and for me to be at home where I started the whole getting ready process with my local nail salon, etc. Since your wedding on Saturday starts so much earlier, I don’t know that I would bother sleeping apart. It’s a tradition my husband liked, so that’s why we did it, but if it didn’t make sense logistically, I wouldn’t have bothered. I did sleep pretty well though!

    Post # 19
    Member
    619 posts
    Busy bee

    We slept together the night before, but we’re not traditional either. We actually got dressed together the day of for our civil ceremony. I was really nervous to be the center of attention so it was awesome that we were able to arrive together. He’s totally my rock, though:)

    Post # 20
    Member
    1606 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2014 - Cape May

    We spent the night together and the next morning we went to breakfast together with our best friends to celebrate our last single meal. We both slept great together and it was nice to have a calm relaxing morning together to get ready and help each other. So we broke every tradition there was but we preferred it that way. When our parents arrived later (destination wedding) all the craziness started so it was really nice to share some couple time together before all the hustle and bustle. I would have been an anxious mess otherwise. 

    Post # 21
    Member
    514 posts
    Busy bee

    We are planning on being together, we are booking 2 rooms in the same hotel (near to the church and reception venue) and staying together both nights, as the hair and make up lady are coming in the morning and that way the photog can get both mine and his getting ready pictures easily. 

    We are booking 2 as he needs a room to get ready in the morning of, so we are paying for both and letting the best man stay in that room the night before as he is travelling down from Scotland (London wedding) so we are paying for 1 night, he is paying for the night of the wedding ๐Ÿ™‚ 

    Post # 22
    Member
    318 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 2015

    I’m getting married this weekend and we’re going to sleep apart the night before the wedding. He’s going to stay at his groomsman’s house and probably have some whiskey, etc to wind down on Friday night. I am going to stay in our house with FI’s mom.

    I’m not too worried about sleeping poorly because he’s not there. I’m worried about sleeping poorly because my mind RACES and I’m going to be wayyyyy to excited to sleep well.

    I think it’ll be nice for us to be apart, eat breakfast separately, and both mentally prepare for the day! But that’s just me. ๐Ÿ˜€

    Post # 23
    Member
    2403 posts
    Buzzing bee

    We planned to spend the night apart (we’ve lived together for years), but when push came to shove and we were actually getting ready for bed, we decided at the last minute to just sleep together. It had been SUCH a stressful day (family stuff – not even wedding related) and we just needed something that felt routine and “safe.” We talked until we fell asleep, and I can’t tell you how wonderful it was waking up together on the morning of our wedding and having that quiet private time to just relax in bed together before we had to get up and start the day. It was fantastic, and I wouldn’t have it any other way now. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 24
    Member
    1293 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    We slept apart (we lived together beforehand). I had some of my BM’s in a hotel room with me and he was with some of his Groomsmen at a different hotel. We planned to use our house for one of us, but cat allergies messed that up. My DH was very adamant about not seeing me before our ceremony, so we did not actually see each other until I was walking down the aisle. 

    I slpet fine, probably not enough hours,  but I was with friends and family. Having the fun girls time the night before was really nice as well. 

    I would have been Ok sleeping with him as well, but since being apart was important to him, and I was neutral, it made sense to to what was important to him. 

    If you are really concerned that you won’t sleep well if you are apart, I would sleep with him so you can actually enjoy your day. Talk to Fiance and see what he thinks too, sometimes what we assume our man wants is not it al all. Don’t worry, you will have that “I’m married” realization no matter what the sleeping situation is. 

    Post # 25
    Member
    462 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2015

    We slept in the same bed the night before. It helped calm both of us down and we spent the morning together until we had to start getting ready. Wouldn’t have done it any other way.

    Post # 26
    Member
    2342 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    Although we aren’t traditional we slept apart the night before the wedding and my daughter slept with me. I really enjoyed that time with my daughter and it just felt a bit special.

    As we all staying at the club where the reception was taking place, we did all meet for breakfast the day of the wedding and exchanged gifts, before parting again until we met at Chelsea Old Town Hall. It was fun to be reunite on the wedding night!

    Post # 27
    Member
    986 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2016

    We already live together so I am trying to convince Fiance to buck tradition and stay in the same room. I have terrible anxiety issues and I know being with him will make me feel better ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 28
    Member
    2165 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    We slept apart and it was part of the whole experience that I wanted. I wanted the first moment we saw each other on our wedding day was when I was walking down the aisle. It was magical and everything I wanted it to be. I did have a girlfriend stay over at the hotel with me that night so I think that helped, having someone with me rather than nobody. 

    Post # 29
    Member
    685 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    We slept apart the night before. DH slept at our apartment and I was at the hotel suite we had at the venue. We needed the suite early the day of the wedding for the bridal party’s hair and makeup, so I just slept there the night before. 

    Post # 30
    Member
    4885 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    View original reply
    lkknight:  We stayed at our house the night before and slept in the same bed. I know neither of us slept well, regardless… just nerves about the next day. Plus, I was getting sick and could barely breathe – so it was awesome!

    We stayed at our house mainly because I was doing my own make-up in the morning and wanted my normal light to get ready in. I could have stayed at the hotel my sister was satying at, but I hate hotel bathroom lighting. Plus, it was easier to pack up my things as I got ready in the moring since we did stay over at the hotel tthat our reception was at, after our wedding.

    No regrets.

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