Did you tell your SO how you'd like to be proposed to?

posted 2 years ago in Engagement
Post # 2
229 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2021

I just told him I didn’t want a public proposal. I’m introverted and hate being the center of attention. I also don’t think he’d enjoy proposing in public either lol. It’s such an intimate and emotional moment. The rest was all up to him though!

It was Friday, May 3rd. I took off work that day for a medical appointment and my car inspection. He left for work that day (or so I thought), and when I got back to our apartment I unlocked the front door and there was a trail of streamers that led upstairs, down the hall, to our closed bedroom door. Inside, FH was dressed up and down on one knee, holding the open ring box. He had decorated the room. It’s one of my favorite days that I’ll never forget. 

Post # 3
867 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2020

I told him I wanted it to be a surprise and I wanted him to definitely get down on one knee. I had a location in mind but I never said anything because I knew I would catch on since it’s somewhere we only went on our first date. 

Post # 4
2359 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

Not really, I had made comments about not wanting the proposal to happen in front of anyone else when we would comment on other peoples proposals, or one on TV. 

He waited to propose until we went on an overseas vacation, we were on this private island for a dinner and after we all sat down (20 other strangers were part of this thing) he took me outside to get a quick selfie and when I turned around after taking the pic he was on one knee. It was perfect, but nothing crazy and elaborate. Neither of us are into the sappy stuff so it would have been really weird for him to go all out with flowers, a speech, etc.

Post # 5
940 posts
Busy bee

Well——- I told him I wanted to be the one to propose, so in that sense I guess I told him quite precisely. He didn’t tell me what he wanted (I think he liked what I did though- a surprise brunch at our favorite event with his favorite  foods)

Post # 6
10451 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

I just asked him not to involve either of our families at all, I wanted it to be just the two of us. 

He proposed on a camping trip where we didn’t even have cell reception so he nailed it 🙂

Post # 7
167 posts
Blushing bee

I said no public and no food (like ring in food; ick). He didn’t do either so i was happy lol

Post # 8
10479 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

No. We went to the store and bought the ring together and he gave it to me in front of friends that night. 

Post # 9
320 posts
Helper bee

Yep. Told him no proposal at all please. 

Post # 10
190 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2019 - Green Bay, WI

I had no clue it was happening so I didn’t have a say, lol.

I knew we were getting engaged within the year becasue he told me early in the year it would “be within a year” but I didn’t expect it to be on our annual Fourth of July party. I didn’t even think he had a ring yet! Little did I know he had gone ring shopping with his sister-in-law (one of my good friends) and they planned this whole big proposal during our annual Fourth of July party in front of both of our parents and a bunch of our closest friends. It was pretty spectacular actually! I was surprised with the proposal and the ring (it’s beautiful though). There’s various videos and photos from the moment (cuz so many people witnessed it) and then we got to celebrate with our family and friends the rest of the day! I do think sis-in-law was a big part of the planning though 😉 

ETA: I mean I guess since I knew it would be within the year that I could’ve said something but I liked the idea of him surprising me and I wasn’t for or against anything in particular. 

Post # 11
726 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

Sort of? 

I told him I’d prefer if he did NOT propose on my birthday or during the holidays (Thanksgiving/Christmas)  because that is just beyond cliche to me. Don’t attack me on that.. just a personal preference. That was the only “guideline” I gave him and even then it was a loose one. 

Ultimately I didn’t care how or when he did it or who he was in front of. He knew me 6 years prior so I knew he would know how to do it and make it special and a surprise. 

Post # 12
132 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2019

This was about 2 months ago. I’d gone with him to the jewelers to pick out the ring, but I didnt know that he’d picked it up, and I didnt really know what the finished product was.

Of course I went on instagram, and in the people you may know section, there was my ring. *facepalm*

About 2 weeks later, at his show (FH is a rock singer and it was the venue in which we met), he stopped in the middle of a set, and proposed. It was definitely super public and the whole venue screamed, but lets be honest, we both somewhat like to be the center of attention haha!

I dont think i’d have ever asked him to do it so publicly, but there are a slew of snapchats & videos from all angles, so thats cool kiss

Post # 13
66 posts
Worker bee

I’m not sure if this will help you, but I did get what I wanted. 

When we first started dating I told him that a public proposal was my worst nightmare and ideally we would get engaged privately, just the two of us. When he started fishing around for information about what kind of ring I would like I told him that I would be open to shopping together and I didn’t care about the ring being a surprise. 

Eventually we just started talking about the wedding as if it was happening. We had planned out a lot of things already. During one of our conversations I asked him if a traditional proposal was important to him and he said no. I told him it wasn’t important to me either. I asked him if he was sure he wouldn’t be disappointed if we didn’t do that and he said absolutely not. I’ve always felt a little uncomfortable about the thought of being proposed to… to me it feels like being chosen rather than being an active participant in my own life. No judgement to those who want it, it’s just not me. 

So then when we were getting serious about buying a house together and moving forward with wedding planning we talked it over and decided to announce it to our families at the next family function. Poof we were engaged. 

The only real surprise I had was finding out he had talked to his Mother about getting his Great Grandmothers ring. He did keep that a secret from me. Once his family said they were happy to pass it onto me he showed me photos of it and asked if I wanted it changed at all. I love it so I didn’t change a thing. 

So yes… I got no proposal at all, which is what I wanted. 

Post # 14
2646 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

We never talked about how he would do it because I feel that’s entirely up to the guy to know you well enough to know what you want.

DH knew me well enough to know not to do it in front of people and to make it special but not instagram over the top special, and that’s exactly what he did. We hiked out to our favourite waterfall to get the third picture for a set of pictures we have there and then he did it. (though I will admit he remembered a random conversation I had with a friend about engagement rings and got it 100% right but I didn’t even know he was listening lmao).

Post # 15
884 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2019

View original reply
paigelove :  We just discussed it because we discuss everything. He mentioned being uncomfortable doing a big grand public proposal. I was also uncomfortable with that.

I told him I didnt want it to happen at home and I wanted it to be a little sentimental but that mostly it just needed to be him asking and I’d be happy.

He proposed in a quiet corner of a quiet restaurant and I dont think anyone there was even paying attention so it was “our” little moment. He looked super handsome and I thought it was perfect!

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