Post # 1
I feel awful saying this, but I don’t really recall my wedding day being the best day ever. We planned our own wedding, so the whole day we were tugged back and forth by vendors, family, and bridal party. I had too many things going on in my head that i couldn’t really enjoy it. Too many things went wrong. It was hectic, stressful, and harried. Honestly, I was just glad to be done with.
Few of my other married friends agreed… They were relieved when their weddings were over too. But I can’t help but feel guilty that I didn’t really enjoy my wedding day. Any other brides have similar experiences?
Post # 2
- Wedding: Malibou Lake Mountain Club
Im really sorry you didnt rnjoy your wedding. was there anything at all that you did enjoy? any feedback from your guests?
my hubby and I planned for our wedding. We did everything from venue hunting, tastings, setting the vendors, etc. I had gotten fallen ill 3 months prior to the wedding and had been on disability for those 3 months up to the wedding and we were stressed because we were concerned with the final installments and whatnot. Luckily, our famiy and friends continued to provide support, helped with DIY items, and many other means of support to make our wedding day happen.
i can honestly say despite feeling relief its over, I am very happy and grateful for the wedding we had and I was so damn happy that day.
Post # 3
The day before my wedding day was completely awful .. it was easily the most stressful day of my life. We planned our own wedding too so we had a lot of negotiations with a million different vendors the week of our wedding.
Luckily we had everything in place for our wedding so the actual day was surprisingly relaxed and enjoyable. I do remember having a definite “thank god that’s over” moment as we walked out of our wedding though.
Try to re-frame your wedding in your memory as being a great day. If you have photos that remind you of stressful moments, put them away. Try to focus on the happy moments and the things that you really enjoyed about your wedding. There’s so much pressure on us brides to have the best day when in reality, it is such a stressful event. Don’t forget that what you see on the Bee, on Facebook and on wedding blogs is the carefully edited version of the “best day ever” – try to do the same thing in your head 🙂
Post # 4
Parts of the day were nice, but the overriding emotion was anxiety. The further out I get, the more I enjoy the memories, but the day of the wedding I was very on edge because my dad was in a terrible mood. He was acting pissed off about everything, and I was afraid there was going to be a really unpleasant confrontation either that night or the next week. Definitely not in the “best day of my life” camp. That being said, I do have some great memories (which, with time, are getting further and further mentally removed from the bad parts), some lovely pictures, and my friends and family really enjoyed themselves.
It’s a lot more fun to be a guest!
Post # 5
I loved my wedding day. It was a blur and my only regret was that it didn’t go on longer for me to spend even more time with family and friends. We (mostly I) also planned our own wedding but I hired a day of coordinator and she was a god send.
Post # 6
totally ge what you mean! it was fairly hectic and while i cried during our vows, the rest of it was spent bustling about getting things done! but i’m so happy to be married.
Post # 7
I’m not married yet, but I was a bridesmaid at my best pal (now my MOH)’s wedding last year. She was SO INCREDIBLY STRESSED! I have never seen anything like it. The couple of days before were a nightmare – myself and the other bridesmaids all felt as though we were walking on eggshells. It was a very DIY wedding and so beautiful in the end, but even on the day she was so worried about getting everything right that she made each and every one of her bridesmaids cry at some point (she doesn’t know this, obviously! We all went away and had a wee teary moment, then just got on with it). I was meant to be helping her into her (preloved) dress, which I thought would be a lovely moment. Sadly, I was worried about the zip as it was a very form-fitting dress and being preloved, I was panicked about breaking the zip (imagine!)… So anyway, I was being a bit slow and careful, and she was so frustrated she just stormed away from me and got one of the other ‘maids to do it 🙁
Halfway through the day, she turned to me and said completely candidly, with a happy smile: “This is the best day of my life!”
You could have knocked me down with a feather. I just assumed she was so stressed that she wasn’t enjoying it! I know I wouldn’t have – still, it was a lesson to me in “what not to do” on my wedding day (no. 1 – don’t shout at my ‘maids), and I’ve chosen her as my Maid/Matron of Honor as I know that rigorous planning is her strong suit! She did say afterwards that she was worried she’d been a bit of a bridezilla, and I’m afraid I wasn’t even able to say “No, no! You weren’t!” All is forgiven now and I’m sure she didn’t realise how she came across to everyone else.
Post # 8
I hate to admit this, but as amazing and fun as the actual wedding was, I have some memories that I’d rather erase and some major regrets.
I didn’t hire a day of coordinator, a member of my DH’s family was going to do it (with pay) and wound up hospitalized the day of the wedding. I didn’t really have a backup plan, but got an adult nephew’s wife to help out at the ceremony and my older brother to help out at the reception. It was still not totally in lockstep, though. My brother disappeared when he was supposed to read a poem, so everyone was in a panic. I found this out later. I had a blast at the reception , but some people have expressed that they’d have liked more direction than they received. I thought it was clear, eat, drink, and be merry!
I have come to really regret my choice of photographer. Mother-In-Law “highly recommended him” ergo pushed him so hard that I felt like I’d be a witch to say no since I had turned down all of her suggestions to that point. His pictures (that I’ve seen so far) are not as good as some that I have seen from guests and even though he’s paid in full, I haven’t gotten all of my pictures. They were promised 2 weeks ago. Seeing some of the amazing pics on here makes me sad because I wish that I hadn’t compromised on something so important. Luckily I had a videographer of *my* choosing with a stellar reputation and will have the video soon.
I have some things that I wish had gone better, but my end result was just what I wanted, my DH and I have committed to each other for life. We both discussed that we are in for the long haul and forever sounds pretty good to me, so I try to forget about what went wrong that day and focus on what went right…and for the record I’m glad it’s over too!
Post # 9
I was VERY relieved when the wedding day was over but truly that day was amazing and so fun. Also, the whole weekend really- we got married on a Friday and had a intimate family wedding ( our families are spread out in the US so it was a fun reunion). I’ll be happy if I never have to plan another event though.
Post # 10
im so sorry! Thats s terrible way to feel!!
I truly enjoyed every minute of my wedding. It went by very fast as everyone said it would. DH was the designated person that vendors went to if there were issues bc he is so calm (unlike me), there were hiccups but i had no clue about them.
that is one piece of advice inwould give every bride to be, is designate a go to person to handle problems
i was however relieved when it was over. I realized that there is a reason why couples take a honeymoon, bc aftwr all that long planning, you need to relax
Post # 11
It wasn’t as great as I had planned. We did a 2 parter. Ceremony was one day with just our parents and the surprise attendance of a few close friends. I had a belly bug so I was in and out of the bathroom all day. A couple months later we had a formal reception with all our friends and family. DH started drinking with his boys pretty heavily before and during the party and I spent so much time worrying about my guests that I didn’t even get a chance to eat really. Oh well. We have the rest of our lives to share good times together.
Post # 12
Most of mine went well, so I was pretty happy overall. The one thing I remember being pissed off about was that after some of the boys were sent to pick up our UTVs (to get people to the ceremony site) they took off on them for awhile and I needed them back at our reception location to help out! I felt that was pretty thoughtless, but we got everything done anyway. I think my husband was more stressed than I was (he was cooking, I just did prep), but we still had plenty of relaxed, happy moments. Our mothers and my aunt were super helpful, as was my best friend and a guest’s girlfriend (that we’d just met).
Still I’m not surprised some people would be less happy looking back – the bigger the wedding the more stressful. That same best friend mentioned above didn’t seem particularly happy on her wedding day – her dress was heavy, she was very nervous, etc. She’s still happy about it in general, but it’s one of the reasons I planned mine to be so relaxed!
Post # 13
I can honestly say that I loved every second of our wedding day. We planned it ourselves with a ton of help from my mom, and she kept things together. I’m sure it was a pretty stressful day for her before the actual wedding started, but DH and I couldn’t have been happier with the day. We had a small wedding at my mom’s cabin with only 40 guests.
Post # 14
The day we had our private ceremony was so wonderful. We could just focus on getting married and starting our new life together.
We had a wedding celebration with family and friends a few months later. Honestly, it was way more stressful and not as blissful as the original day. There was more entertaining we had to do for our families beforehand, and several things did not go as planned. For example, I got in a little argument with my mom because she didn’t like how I looked. Then because I wasn’t able to do the setup as anticipated, I didn’t get to set out her centerpieces, which I still feel horrible about.
I was always in the camp of having a courthouse wedding, and I still stand by that.
Post # 15
You sound like such a sweet person and a great friend! She was lucky to have you as a ‘maid.