(Closed) Did you will you use gifts before the wedding?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Did you use any gifts received before the wedding?
    Yes, any gifts that came in! : (40 votes)
    59 %
    Yes, but only shower gifts! : (6 votes)
    9 %
    No way! : (17 votes)
    25 %
    Other : (5 votes)
    7 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2849 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    I’m using every gift as soon as it comes in the mail. I don’t see the reason to wait until after the wedding, especially if it’s something I can really use like a new trash can, spice rack, etc. The person who sent the gift won’t have any idea if I waited or not, so I don’t see the point in waiting.

    Post # 4
    Member
    10288 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011

    I never understood why couples would wait to use their gifts. These people gave you things you asked for and they want you to use them. Why in the world would I have used my ratty old hand mixer to bake with when I had a brand spanking new Kitchenaid Pro sitting in my dining room? Doesn’t make any sense to me.  

    Post # 5
    Hostess
    16213 posts
    Honey Beekeeper

    We waited, only because we didn’t live together before the wedding, so it was pretty easy to wait to use them till after the wedding!

    Post # 6
    Member
    3261 posts
    Sugar bee

    We got soo many gifts at our shower and they’re all just sitting in my basement and I want to use them SO BAD. lol but Fiance and I don’t live together, and we’re going to wait until we move out of state (2 months after our wedding) to even use them. >:l

    Post # 7
    Member
    5977 posts
    Bee Keeper

    We didn’t live together before we were married, and my Darling Husband didn’t think it was fair for him to be able to enjoy the gifts without me, so we didn’t use them at all before the wedding. 

    Post # 8
    Member
    3220 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: February 2012

    We’ll be waiting for a majority of them because we don’t live together and it will be easier to move everything and set up everything at once! But I don’t think anything’s wrong with using them if you’ve got the place/space/need!

    Post # 9
    Member
    5762 posts
    Bee Keeper

    The reason you’re supposed to wait is really ‘just in case’, meaning, in case the wedding never takes place. Once you’ve unpacked them and started using them, if for some reason the wedding is cancelled or postponed, the guests really have no option for getting them back and returning them. Most would tell you to keep them anyway, but that’s the real reason you should wait.

    It actually just happened to my neice. The wedding was supposed to be in less than a month from now, and we just found out 2 days ago it’s being postponed,indefinitely, and may never happen….3 weeks post shower.

    Post # 10
    Member
    2416 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Of course. We live together already so we’re eager to upgrade some of our house items. I really don’t see the need to wait in our situation. Seems llike it would be the waste of a great gift.

    Post # 11
    Member
    964 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    We would have had to ship the gifts from the shower location (1200 miles) away and been VERY expensive. We have a friend that will transport them back after the wedding, so we must wait. Any gifts delivered to the door are fair game though!

    Post # 12
    Member
    2106 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    We’re going to use any small things but keep appliances boxed because we’ll be moving sometime between the shower and the wedding. 

    Post # 13
    Member
    1093 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I voted yes (any gift that comes in). But, we live in such a small apartment now that we’ll probably end up storing most of the stuff at my parent’s house until be move to some place bigger. 

    Post # 14
    Member
    925 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    We used some of them, but not all. We used a few appliances and put out some of the vases, etc that we got.

    Post # 15
    Member
    411 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    @ItWasntMe:  I’m with you — I’m not using mine for the same reason.

    This is oddly just about the only thing I’m superstitious about. We’re seeing each other before the ceremony, and probably will sleep in the same house (though not the same room) the night before … but I refuse to use the gifts. I keep joking with Future Mother-In-Law, who bought us a beautiful new set of pots and pans, that it’ll be just my luck that the wobbly handle falls off my crappy old pot and dumps boiling water all over me a week before the wedding. And hers are still sitting in the box they came in!

    Plus I like the idea of starting a new life together with a bunch of new stuff. We’ll get to come back from our honeymoon and immediately begin using all the sweet new “toys” that will have come our way 🙂

    Post # 16
    Member
    842 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    Our kitchen has been transformed by all our shower gifts, it’s awesome!  I couldn’t wait to use my new Calphalon pans to cook with.  And I gave my Fiance a baking lesson last weekend with our new bakeware and kitchenaid so that we could bring a cake to his family’s for easter. 

    If I ever get some free time, I really want to try out our new Cuisinart food processor and make some pizza dough in it, and shred cheese for a pizza, then bake it on our new pizza stone. 

    I guess I can understand the ettiquette of not using things before the wedding, in case it doesn’t happen.  But I would think most people aren’t thinking just weeks before the wedding that it might not happen.  Or that they should wait and see how it goes.  Of course if you do have doubts, then yes don’t use the stuff.  But at this point I’m 47 days away and as far as we’re both concerned we just can’t wait, this train has left the station and barring some super huge tradgedy, the wedding is on.

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