Did you/would you ring shop together, or have it be a surprise?

posted 9 months ago in Rings
  • poll: Ring shop, or surprise?
    Shop rings together and purchase right then and there and then just wait for proposal. : (33 votes)
    40 %
    Shop to get sized & show him styles you like, let him choose the ring another time and surprise you : (30 votes)
    37 %
    Tell him what you do/don't like in a ring, have the rest be completely up to him : (17 votes)
    21 %
    Don't give hints, just let him surprise you one day. : (2 votes)
    2 %
  • Post # 2
    Member
    64 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: June 2019 - Huntsville, AL

    We shopped together and picked one out, but due to financial issues it ended up being a surprise, but it still had the features of rings I liked.

    Post # 3
    Member
    246 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2019

    We shopped together and I decided on an oval and we both decided on the setting together. He surprised me with the exact diamond that he bought to go in it.

    Post # 4
    Member
    375 posts
    Helper bee

    My fiance asked me how involved I wanted to be in picking a ring. I had stared at Costco rings, so we tried some on when shopping and got sized. He told me a budget and we looked at a lot of different settings, so he could understand my likes/dislikes. We looked at a lot of second hand rings, so I was pretty open minded and showed him a pretty wide variety. 

    He actually has bought a ring and kept up the charade of looking at rings right until the night before he proposed. 

    He also told me a smaller budget than he had set aside, so he could wow me. It worked. I was surprised and love the ring he chose.

    Post # 5
    Member
    6434 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: February 1997

    My Dh and I looked at rings together. He ended up buying the exact ring I wanted, but not while I was there, so I didn’t know he had purchased it. My father took my mum ring shopping and bought her ring (and proposed to her) right on the spot – and that was many years ago. It never occurred to me that some men just bought something without their future wife’s input, but to each their own.

    Post # 6
    Member
    43 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: July 2016

     For us, we went to look at rings together, mainly for me to try on styles. I am so thankful that we did because the styles I originally liked I realized I hated on my finger. There is no way my husband or I, would have realized that otherwise. I ended up finding my dream ring that my husband went and bought later that afternoon. He never told me he was buying it, but I had my suspicions. We were at the mall together and he left me to go take care of something. It didn’t take away from the proposal at all, and I am so happy to have the ring that suits me perfectly.

    Post # 7
    Member
    520 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2019

    I chose the setting and cut and he chose the stone. We did look in a local store but then I chose it from Blue Nile so it wasn’t a buying it right there situation exactly. Picking out a style of ring for me would be a nightmare for him and I knew what I wanted so it worked out perfectly. 

    Post # 8
    Member
    108 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2018

    We went together. I picked out a few choices and he picked one from there! He did not buy when I was there. So it was still a surprise.

    Post # 9
    Member
    1340 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2019

    I’m very picky. My Fiance knew better than to leave this up to chance. We went to a shop that specializes in vintage jewelry and I pretty much picked out my perfect setting. He tried to play it off when we got home that he needed to go to the grocery store, but I knew he was going back to buy it. ๐Ÿ˜

    He picked the stone out all by himself so it was still a wonderful surprise when he did propose. Also helps that the proposal was a complete knockout. It took him three days to plan.

    Post # 10
    Member
    652 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2018

    I never had an idea about what kind of engagement ring I’d like as I am northern European and engagement rings are not a big thing or no thing at all. I always thought a ring should be somewhat like the Tiffany Harmony: 4 prong basket setting.

    During our trip to Amsterdam I was as usual stylish underdressed and freezing my butt off so we went into the Department store across from our hotel to find me a shawl. And that store had a Tiffany’s inside. He made me try some rings on. I was so embarrassed. I tried on the harmony ring and I liked but he insisted on trying the classic Tiffany and I fell in love. Like I knew that was it. It had to be a Tiffany style 6 prong solitaire. I also immediately knew that under no circumstances I wanted a Tiffany’s ring. Way to much money (and carats) wasted just a name brand. He was very happy with my choice as a solitaire was a “real” engagment ring in his eyes. 

    After that I started looking into rings. I looked into different style and was surprised about the quantity offered on US website. I’ve never even heard of halos before. They are not my thing. It’s like less rock, more pebbles somehow. Cant explain it. Love it on gemstone rings though. So my husband and I were on the same page. 

    I was very specific about the setting and ended up with about +/- 6 settings I liked. I put the links in a file and sent it to my husband alongside information on online diamond shopping and educational websites about the 4Cs. Somewhere along the way he also learned my preferences in color and clarity. 

    He never said anything about it until the day he proposed. With my favorite setting and an extraordinary diamond. 

    Post # 11
    Member
    1081 posts
    Bumble bee

    At first I showed him pictures of what I liked to give him ideas and described specifically what it was that I liked about the pictures and then I left it at that. 

    But then he tried to trick me into looking at rings! Although it didn’t work because I’m clueless and oblivious sometimes ๐Ÿ™‚

    We were Christmas shopping for his mom and she gave him a list of things as ideas for Christmas gifts for her and he read through the list to me:

    ”Size 9 winter boots, pajamas, gloves, scarf, pandora bracelet” and he quickly decided on the bracelet and took me to a jeweler lol. They did not have pandora. So he was like “well just look around!” So I was looking for his mom and didn’t see anything similar to pandora and we left. As we were getting in the car, he said “I thought you’d look at the rings” and then I realized lol. Sneaky bae:)

    We actually went and looked at rings the next day and I’m really glad we did because I tried on a lot of styles and I didn’t realize how picky I am! He even said he was glad he didn’t just go out and pick something like he originally was going to. He was asking lots of questions and we made a wishlist of my favorites so it was a lot of fun! So I’m kind of torn between B and C because I think they’re both good options! 

    Post # 12
    Member
    724 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2019

    We looked together and I found a ring I was in love with ๐Ÿ™‚ He surprised me with the proposal though! <3

    Post # 13
    Member
    4 posts
    Wannabee

    We had talked a few times about how I would like us to choose the ring together. I’m sure he would have picked something beautiful, but I really wanted to be involved in choosing the ring. I guess I’m picky lol Anyway, he proposed with a stand in ring (a family ring) then we went to a few shops to get an idea of what I liked and to get sized. I then found a ring online that I really loved and showed it to him along with some diamonds that I had my eye on. I let him take over from there, now just waiting for my ring to arrive! ๐Ÿ˜€

    Post # 14
    Member
    1072 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2019

    citizenerased14 :  Same.

    Love Fiance to death. Do not love his taste. We picked the ring together, but he surprised me with a beautiful proposal. So still got the surprise.

    Besides, we have joint finances. Buying a ring would never have been a surprise for me, lol. At least this way I got to choose my ring.

    Post # 15
    Member
    252 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2020 - City, State

    I love my fiancé to death and would trust him with my life but I would not trust him to pick out a ring for me. Our aesthetics are mostly quite different, with some overlap. I knew what I wanted and it was important to him that I have what I really wanted (within reason) if I was gonna wear it for the rest of my life—which I plan to do.

    So I sent him a link to the band I liked with information about my preferences for customization (metal, stone, etc), and then we went together to go get sized. Then, unplanned, I found a stone that was perfect on a Black Friday sale and he bought it over breakfast then and there. So I picked it all out, but he really liked it, and he bought the stone online and the ring is being made across the country… so when the “official” proposal occurs (we consider ourselves already engaged at this point and have booked a venue) I won’t have actually seen the ring in person before (although I’ve seen the stone), and I do t know exactly when it will be ready. That’s enough surprise for me. I voted first option.

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