Did you write your own vows?

posted 5 months ago in Ceremony
Post # 2
1266 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

I kinda did both. I wrote the whole ceremony but I made the vows repeat after me style and I liked it that way.

Post # 3
247 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2019 - Sandpoint, ID

We wrote our own vows. My sil became ordained so she could marry us. She said some stuff and threw in some really funny quotes from movies we both love so it was fun. She loosely followed some things she found in regards of what to say and then she had us say our vows. My husband said his first and then I said my to hubby. Then sil said some more stuff and then it ended in us being pronounced husband and wife and the kiss. We were originally thinking of just repeating after the officiant, but decided it sounds too scripted and went for writing our own vows. It was so much more personal and meaningful to us. 

The reason hubby didn’t originally want to write his own vows is because he doesn’t say really love-y sappy things to me in front of his family and so he was a little shy to do it. He ultimately decided to go for it, but if we hadn’t, we had a back-up plan. If we had not read vows in front of everyone, we were still going to write our own vows and say them to each other in private before the ceremony and then just repeat after the officiant (sil) in front of everyone. You have lots of options though! Do whatever you and your fh feel comfortable with. 

Post # 4
6730 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

We wrote something short and sweet and read it from a scrap of paper like classy people. Our officiant was my Father-In-Law who did so in an unofficial capacity – we signed the paperwork elsewhere. So he just guided the process and gave a prayer.

It worked out fine except the guests thought I wasn’t answering my husband’s question as I stated something else first and tried to correct me, lol. I told them to be patient, we all laughed and moved on (small group). Later I put them into our wedding album, which I made on snapfish. I probably wouldn’t have bothered if it had just been generic vows. 

Post # 5
9870 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

We wrote our own. But not separately, we wrote them together and both recited (read off a piece of paper) the same vows. I love our vows, they were short and sweet and really fit us/our relationship.

Post # 6
962 posts
Busy bee

Darling Husband and I wrote our ceremony together and our vows separately. We read our vows off notecards. Our officiant was one of DH’s friends. 

Post # 7
1112 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

We wrote our own and it was so special.

Post # 8
1062 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2019

We sort of did…. being gushy in front of people isn’t our thing. So we each chose a reading for the other that one of our best friends read. Mine was the Irish blessing of the hands and his was from Spider-Man and they fit perfectly lol. For our actual vows we didn’t write our own but we didn’t do the traditional love honor and obey either, we found modern vows on the internet that we connected with. They were about growing together while supporting each other as individuals, being generous with time and love, having patience etc. ericaleesi :  

Post # 9
661 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2019

We wrote them but it was a repeat after me scenario as we were both too nervous to say them on our own type thing.. the entire ceremony was written by us and delivered impeccable by our humanist (a non religious Scottish ceremony) 

Post # 10
713 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2019

We just repeated after the officiant. We are not the kinda couple to get emotional/sentimental in front of everyone so this worked best for us.

Post # 11
20 posts
  • Wedding: May 2020

We are going to go with what the officiant has, I am such a huge sap that I know if we wrote our own vows I would be a crying mess the whole way through.  As it is I am not even sure if I will make it down the aisle without crying 🤣

Post # 12
449 posts
Helper bee

We just went with the script our officiant had (he let us review and modify in advance but we mostly left it the same).

Darling Husband and I are super emotional and sappy but that mainly stays between us. I knew if I wrote my own vows I would just cry and I did NOT want that. Im happy with what we did. The wedding is procedural, we both know how much we love eachother.

Post # 13
286 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

We wrote our own and I love that we did because we each made promises of different things to each other of what they value if that makes sense. Like no one stuck by my husband so it’s always been incredibly important to him, whereas I was never accepted for me so he promised me that 🙂

We wrote the whole ceremony together but did vows separately and read them to each other on the day. 

Post # 14
3531 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2017 - City, State

We wrote our vows together, and then had the officiant read them and we repeated after her. I knew I wouldn’t be able to memorize it, and I didn’t want to read them off of a piece of paper. We were very happy with them.

Post # 15
1334 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2019

We wrote our own and I’m sooo glad we did. We read them to each other.

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