(Closed) Did your current relationship start as an affair?

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Did your relationship start as an affair?
    Yes, on his part. : (31 votes)
    5 %
    Yes, on my part. : (70 votes)
    11 %
    Yes, we were both in a relationship. : (23 votes)
    4 %
    No. : (499 votes)
    77 %
    Not my current relationship, but a past one started as an affair. : (25 votes)
    4 %
  • Post # 94
    Member
    221 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    @Zhabeego:  LOL. Your reply was embarrasingly catty and very transparently defensive.You obviously have some issues with how your relationship started.  That’s no one else’s fault and doesn’t justify you lashing out. 

    You are completely entitled to your opinion. Apparently not all of the people that have sent me messages privately would agree with you though.

    Post # 96
    Member
    105 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    “How you get him….is how you lose him”

     

    I’ve always heard the women in my family say this time and time again, and I’ve seen it. Thankfully when I found my future husband we were both single. I know everybody’s situation is different, I just don’t think it’s a good way to start a relationship. Just my little ’ol opinion.Laughing

    Post # 97
    Member
    221 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    @Zhabeego:  Even if the marriage has broken down but not ended, you’re still shitty people. 

    This is a prime example of name calling, judementaland close minded.

    Post # 98
    Member
    1845 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    All of my relationships have started when both parties were fully single (to the best of my knowledge). 

    However, my ex started cheating on me for about the last 6 months of our relationship (we were together 2 years), and he ended up marrying her a couple years later. They now have two children together. He also happens to now be my brother-in-law, as my Fiancé is the “other woman’s” brother. ( we all worked together). 

    It took us all a few years for us to become ok with the situation, and truly become friends. My Fiance hated him for what he did to me (his friend at the time) and his sister (being a lying, cheating pig), and I didn’t want anything to do with either of them for obvious reasons. But eventually, we all moved on and we are good friends now. Our children play together all the time,  are family. 

    I’m not going to try and pretend that it doesn’t secretly bring me great happiness that they have what would be considered by most as a “loveless marriage” and yeah, i know that makes me a horrible person, but hey…karmas a bitch. My fi and I are blessed and so incredibly happy, and they well, aren’t. Living well really is sweet revenge. 

    Post # 99
    Member
    12246 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2013

    @lifesaride:  I think that’s TOTALLY different! They were already in the divorce process. It’s not like he met you THEN decided to divorce her!

    Post # 100
    Member
    12246 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2013

    @jellybeangreen246:  Woah. However you met your husband is up to you, no judgement,

    But unless your husband was repeatedly beaten and too terrified of her to leave, please don’t compare him to a battered woman.

    Post # 102
    Member
    2493 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I voted “yes, on my part“, but I don’t actually consider it a full-blown affair.

    I had been with my (high school) ex-boyfriend for 5 months when Darling Husband and I started talking (online). DH’s father worked at the college I was attending, in my area of study, and our conversing was strictly platonic. Over the course of the next 5 months, however, Darling Husband began to hint at wanting to meet… and after months of shrugging him off, I agreed to coffee. That coffee meeting turned into more that night, and we ended up kissing/making-out quite a lot…

    I broke up with my boyfriend the next day, and 6 hours later, Darling Husband and I went on an official date. That was 12 1/2 years ago, now!

    Post # 103
    Member
    4522 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    I am *very* careful to get all sides of these stories, as the “victim” isn’t always telling the truth.

    Over a month before we got involved as anything more than friends, he was very casually seeing someone. Casual by all accounts: his friends, his coworkers, his family, everyone. It was only a few months and they saw each other maybe once every couple of weeks. Again, he broke things off with her and she went off of the deep end about it. Because of her reaction, he waited a few weeks before asking me out, as he didn’t want her to find out and chalk their break up (if you could even call it that) up to *anything* other than “you just weren’t the one.” He was trying to be a nice guy and not make her feel bad.

    Well, we started seeing each other and one night about 2 months after he’d last seen her we went to a bar and bumped into a coworker of hers…who immediately texted her to let her know she’d seems him with a female.

    She lost it, started texting and facebooking him right then calling him a liar, and that he’d “left her for another woman.”

    *To this day* she is still trying to convince any mutual friend or acquaintances that they were “practically engaged” and “going to get married” and that he “left” her for someone else. She even tried harassing me and *his family* on Facebook. A year into our relationship, she even showed up at my job trying to start a confrontation with me…..and she was on a date when she did. 

    All of her infidelity accusations are purely fictional. I guess that’s my point: before believing someone is a vile cheater, make sure you aren’t getting a completely fabricated story from a scorned person.

    Post # 104
    Member
    251 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    Can’t we al just agree to disagree? Everyone’s story is different and no one here knows the full situation of anyone else on here. We can’t generalize about anyone else or whose husband is telling the truth and who isn’t. We should be trying to stick together and support each other instead of tearing each other down.

     

    If you are comfortable in your relationship and how it started then more power to you!!

     

    Post # 105
    Member
    230 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: February 2012

    @BrandNewBride:  It was mental and emotional abuse, not unlike what a woman goes through when she is physically abused.  Yes, that’s right, men can be abused too, but in different ways.

    Post # 106
    Member
    230 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: February 2012

    @Miss Mauverick:  Thank you!  Someone who finally gets it!  My husband’s family is over the moon happy that he met me and got out of his previous marriage. 

    The topic ‘Did your current relationship start as an affair?’ is closed to new replies.

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