Post # 1
Title sums it up–did your FMIL go with you to your dress appt? My mom is FREAKING out cause I had invited my FMIL to go with us, we’re close and she doesn’t have any daughters so I thought she’d like to go but now my mom is all “it’s a mother daughter moment and she’s not taking that from me”. I’m on the fence here, I see my mom’s point but I don’t want to hurt my FMIL’s feelings!! Help!!
Post # 2
I invited mine and she came 🙂 I honestly always thought it would just be me and my mom and maybe my long time best friend/moh but in the end I had my mom, mil, moh, and two bm. I wouldn’t change it if I could. It was a really great afternoon and a nice moment having them all there to support me. My MIL flew from PA to FL so she could be there. DH is an only child and I thought it would be nice for her to be a part of it and I’m really glad she was able to be there.
Post # 3
RedheadMeggs: Oh man :/ What a situation. I think that’s very nice of you to invite your FMIL. Have you tried having a conversation with your mom, telling her your point of view and why you invited your FMIL. Maybe putting that into perspective for her will allow her to accept and welcome your FMIL to dress shopping.
I did invite my FMIL to my (future) dress shopping. I am very close with her, value her opinion, and she too has no daughters. My family was very happy I invited her, they even suggested it way earlier.
Post # 4
RedheadMeggs: no, but mainly because I took my mum and my grandma with me and most places asked that you didn’t bring more than 2 people on a Saturday. It was important to bring my grandma with us because my granddad had recently died and it was a good way to get her out and about doing something happy. Otherwise, I would likely have invitedy MIL to at least one shopping trip. I did invite her to my first fitting and it was lovely to have her there. If you are close with your FMIL and want her there then I think it is a lovely thing to invite her. Maybe plan one appoinment on a different day just with you and your mum to make your mum feel better?
Post # 5
RedheadMeggs: she didn’t come with me dress shopping because she couldn’t make the appointment but if she did come, my mother would not have cared. She did come with me to all my fittings because my mother couldn’t make it to those appointments lol
Post # 6
No. Didn’t want her there.
Post # 7
No, because both my mother and MIL live far away and would have to travel in for the appointment. I couldn’t deal with the idea of both of them staying in my tiny NYC apartment. I feel bad, because my husband is an only child. In the end, I didn’t up buying my dress with my mom either, but did go to a couple of salons with her.
Post # 8
I did, and she came. My MIL has a daughter, but I wanted her to feel involved, because I really love her, and she’s always been wonderful to me. She also came with us to the salon on the day of the wedding. My mom and her get along, and my mom had no problem with it.
I think your mom is being unfair in giving you a hard time. You have the right to invite whomever you choose.
Post # 9
I really just wanted it to be my mom and I. My mom would’ve been upset knowing her. Luckily, my MIL lives 5 hours away so I never even invited her. She has a daughter so she’s okay.
Post # 10
My FMIL is from out of town so it would be difficult. I invited just my mom and MOH to the first time, it will probably be my mom and I for he second time, but I would like my FMIL to come to one. I’ve shown her pictures so far.
Post # 11
I really didn’t think it was going to be a big deal and had even mentioned a month or two ago that we were all going to go and make a day of it, have lunch and whatnot but now that I just scheduled the appt for 9/6 my mom isn’t having it and she’s putting me in a shitty spot 🙁
Post # 12
I brought my Mom, Dad, and FMIL. My FMIL loved being a part of it. She has two sons so I thought it would be nice for her to get to be a part of the dress experience. I don’t know how your FMIL is but mine was very respectful during the appointment. She mostly just sat back and watched and when I found my dress, my mom and I had our moment and then I went over and hugged FMIL. Her being there did not take away from the moment with my mom at all!
Post # 13
I think your mom is acting immaturely. I think asking your MIL was a nice thing to do, she doesn’t have a daughter and you wanted to share the experience with her.
My MIL didn’t come with me because she has a daughter, but I’m also not a fan of being the center of attention so I kept it just me and my mom.
Post # 14
- Wedding: October 2014 - Church
RedheadMeggs: I hadn’t invited her because there were already so many people. I’m going to invite her to come to one of the fittings (not the first one), though. We get along but I am not that close and didn’t feel up to trying on dresses in front of her. You’ve already invited her, though, so you don’t really have an option. I think your mom is being a little silly. My FMIL is being respectful of the boundary that she isn’t my actual mother so it’s not a big deal.
Post # 15
I had intetions of bringing mine with me I just happen to find my dress much quicker than expected with just my mom there. My sister wasn’t even there. But I would have brought her with me and she wanted to go.