(Closed) Did your SO/FI/DH ask permission for your hand?

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Did your SO/FI/DH ask permission for your hand in marraige?
    Yes : (189 votes)
    68 %
    No : (88 votes)
    32 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    971 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2008

    I was 19 and pregnant when we got engaged … a little too late to ask for permission, eh! 

    Post # 4
    Member
    586 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    @BanditGirl: Haha, my brother asked his 18 year-old girlfriend’s dad for permission, and I totally made fun of him for it. Like, “Really bro? You already took more than her hand!”

    Post # 5
    Member
    7693 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    I got married 28 years ago-nope!  No one did that back then-WAY before then, but not then.  I find it kind of odd that it’s being done again. lol.

    Post # 6
    Member
    463 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2010

    Both my BIL and hubby went to both my parents and didn’t really ask, but just said I plan on asking your daughter to marry me.  My parents thought it was kinda cool and nice that they were notified first.  They just all hugged it out and had a drink together to celebrate!

    Post # 7
    Member
    661 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2011

    He asked for both my parents permission.  We were together 6 yrs when he proposed and for my father; he thought my Fiance was pretty late!  lol

    So, he felt the need to ask both my parents (they’re both police officers and not emotional) until he asked and showed the ring.  Evidently, that’s all that took, both were in tears.

    And I’m glad he did it …. 🙂

    Post # 8
    Member
    4137 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    i do think it’s old-fashioned (maybe traditional is a better word?), but it’s a very sweet gesture!

    Post # 9
    Member
    1966 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Fiance didnt ask but he told him that he was going to propose & told him when & where. Maybe bc we have a daughter, he didnt feel he had to ask but wanted him to know. Apperantly my whole family knew lol, my little sister even hid the ring until the night he asked!

    Post # 10
    Member
    3012 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    J wanted to, but my situation is a little bit difficult.  My dad was never in my life.  My mom and I don’t really get along.  So, he’d have to ask my grandparents, but on Christmas Eve – he couldn’t find the right time to.  I do know that he was going to tell my grandmom he was planning to propose, but thought she would cry or something would happen and I’d be curious.  

    Post # 11
    Member
    7695 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2010

    Yes Darling Husband asked my dad about one week before he proposed!

    Post # 12
    Member
    1105 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2009

    Mine Darling Husband did and it made my dad feel really good and respected!

    Post # 13
    Member
    642 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    My Fi did and I think it’s really just a nice gesture these days.  He didn’t actually need permission of course.  We are a little older (FI-38 and me-30), but I think my father really respected his decision to ask.  I found out later from my step-mother that when my father tried to tell her what just happened he couldn’t get it out without tears.  Then they were both in tears!

    Post # 14
    Member
    206 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    My Fiance didn’t ask my dad, which surprised me because Fiance is pretty traditional.  I didn’t mind though, because I already knew how much my dad loves him.

    Post # 15
    Member
    1398 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    Yea he did, I thought it was so romantic and sweet. I had mentioned that I thought it would be nice maybe a year before he proposed, but I didn’t expect him to! It was so great because he asked right before we left on our engagement trip to NYC, which is where my parents live but it was supposed to be a “secret weekend”. After he proposed I called my dad to tell him the news and he said he knew it was coming, but when they found out we were in NY they were so excited they took us out to lunch 🙂 It was truly the best weekend ever.

    Post # 16
    Member
    401 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    My Fiance didn’t ask for permission per se, but he did call my parents to tell them that he was planning to propose and to ask for their blessing.

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