(Closed) did you/would you tell family/friends when you were TTC?

posted 8 years ago in Babies
  • poll: Would you tell people when you start TTC?
    No one. I would keep this between the two of us. : (118 votes)
    55 %
    I would tell our parents. : (23 votes)
    11 %
    I would tell a close friend or two. : (63 votes)
    29 %
    I would be completely open about it with everyone. : (11 votes)
    5 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    7587 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2010

    Nope. If you can’t get pregnant imagine the heart ache every time someone brings it up.  I wouldn’t tell anyone. Just keep it private.

    Post # 4
    Member
    1940 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2010

    The only reason I’d consider telling a close friend or two is because it’s likely that we’ll TTC around the same time (shortly after we’re done with graduate school).  If it comes up in conversation, I’d consider letting our parents know.  Having said that, our parents understand that there are boundaries and our decisions are our’s alone. 

    Out of curiousity, are you planning on TTC when your husband is in med school/ residency?  I go to school with medicine/ pharmacy students (and know quite a few medical residents), and it seems extra stressful when the person has a spouse, let alone a child.  Of course there are couples/ families who do get through it unscathed though too 🙂

    Post # 6
    Member
    2867 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    I wouldn’t because then I feel like people would always be asking about it or hinting about babies. People do it even if the don’t know you’re TTC so why have all the added pressure of them asking you every month.

    However if it ends up taking a while and you NEED someone to talk to I’d tell a close friend or family member so you at least have someone else that could offer support.

    Post # 7
    Member
    5993 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2010

    i voted i wouldnt tell anyone, especially if i thought i would have problems conceiving. maybe after some time if you do have issues (which i dont hope you wont) you might share this with someone but i would give it some “just us” time for now

     

    Post # 9
    Member
    5921 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: December 2010

    I don’t think we will tell anyone either.  I think it will be a lot of pressure and nosy, uneccessary questions. I’ll probably tell my Mom though…LOL.  I tell her pretty much everything.

    Post # 10
    Member
    2154 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    I don’t think I’d tell anyone except maybe – MAYBE – my closest friends. But maybe not even that. It’s pretty personal. I feel like some people would be grossed out that I was telling them, and the other people would pester me with awkward, awkward questions.

    No, just no.

    Post # 11
    Member
    1940 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2010

    @bloodgo1:  I completely understand the whole timing thing.  If it were up to see, we’d start TTC now, but it’s just not feasible.  We’ll probably start TTC while I’m in residency (it’s a one additional year program for my field of study) with the goal of having the baby a few months after finishing.  One a side note, I know a guy in grad school who is married and had his third child recently.  All the kids are less than 4 years old.  I think it helps a lot that his wife stays home full-time though!

    Re: the poll.  I’m surprised so few people would tell anyone!

    Post # 12
    Member
    245 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2011

    We definitely won’t be telling anyone once that time comes.  We have several friends who are trying right now, and every time we see them, we’re watching to see if she’s drinking alcohol.  I would never ask, but I know that people often do, which is a lot of pressure. 

    Post # 13
    Member
    2821 posts
    Sugar bee

    We didn’t tell anyone specifically OK now we’re trying.  A couple of my friends around wedding time asked if we had a timeline for kids and I gave them a vague sort of when we were thinking about it answer.  We didn’t tell either of our parents anything though we did joke around about kids so they knew we were planning on having htem at some point.

    My husbands doing a dual degree so we also chose to have a baby before he finishes up med school.  Too long of a process to wait but we think it will work out just fine. 

    Post # 14
    Member
    287 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    umm my parents’ toast to us at the wedding mentioned “pitter patter of little feet” and then in our guest book, a parent wrote “grandchildren are a must!” subtle, right?

    even now, anytime i mention that i’m tired or hungry or anything that could even slightly be considered something to do with PG, my mom says “maybe you’re pregnant”

    i don’t think you need to tell anyone. when people ask, we say we’re just going to let things happen when they happen even though we are putting a little more thought, effort and planning into it right now. its kinda sorta true. the only reason i have said anything is because i have 6 weddings to go to next year, 3 of which i’m in and 1 that is my sister so i have mentioned that fact that its possible i may be PG and they’ll just have to deal. but other than that, really its no one’s business. i feel like it could create undue pressure, which is not good, especially since you already have some reproductive concerns anyway.

    Post # 15
    Member
    1030 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    Edit.

    Post # 16
    Member
    5148 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    Both our sets of parents know we want kids; and I told my mom a general time frame (we’ll probably start trying next year). But I don’t think we’ll be like “okay, we officially started trying!”, and I don’t even want to tell anyone for a few months after I get pregnant.

    The topic ‘did you/would you tell family/friends when you were TTC?’ is closed to new replies.

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