(Closed) Didn't think a long engagement would be stressful…

posted 5 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
3277 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@MelBan:  We got engaged last October as well and are planning a 2014 wedding. It took me 3 months to find out venue, and when I found it, it was already booked 2 years out:( so I had to push back the date we really wanted. I already bought my dress, picked colors, photographer, dj, etc. This book fast so I think you should at least pick a date and start searching for vendors.

Post # 4
23602 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

@MelBan:  You can do it in 9-12 months, no problem!  It’s okay to take your time!  DH and I were engaged in May 2010 (holy cow where has the time gone), and got married in Sept 2011, and I didn’t really start planning our wedding until about a year in advance.  Don’t worry! And hey, if you need any advice, that’s what we are all here for! 🙂

Post # 5
2295 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I had an eight month engagement. As long as you’re willing to be a little flexible on the date (or the venue) and the vendors you select, then you absolutely will be FINE with 9 – 12 months. Totally fine.

There were a handful of vendors at 7 – 8 months out that I couldn’t get because they were booked. But honestly, that didn’t bother me. It was the first question I asked when investigating vendors and if they weren’t available, I didn’t keep researching them.

Just don’t get attached to any vendors (especially photographers) until you have a date locked in and they are available. The big problem comes in when someone has been drooling over a vendor’s or venue’s site for months and then calls to book it and they aren’t available, then the person is crushed.

We ended up having to have a date 3 weeks earlier than we originally wanted – but guess what? The weather was PERFECT the new weekend but terrible on the preferred date; and one of my bridesmaids got pregnant and was due really close to the preferred date; and THEN I got my period on the day that was supposed to be our original preferred wedding date. Thank GOODNESS we got pushed 3 weeks earlier! Things work out.

Post # 6
2685 posts
Sugar bee

I can absolutely relate – engaged in November, not getting married until September 2014 due to house expenses.  In my case, we’re doing a backyard wedding and we need this year to pay for and work on the backyard (putting up a fence, reseeding the lawn, building a new patio).  But yeah, people do keep asking why I’m not booking things.  My mom told me the other week I need to send save-the-dates soon or else people will forget.  Seriously?


Anyway, 9-12 months is very normal for wedding planning.  I will suggest that you should take advantage of this extra time and use it to do research or some DIY projects.  These are things you can do right now without booking or putting down deposits.  I’ve already put together a shortlist of vendors and have contacted a handful for quotes, but the serious booking will start over the summer.  I’ve also been working on paper flower decorations because they take a long time to create and I’d rather not wait until the last minute to stress out about them.  

Post # 7
9142 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

I planned my first wedding in 5 months and had no problem finding a venue or photographer for my date.  12 months is standard for planning but many ladies do it in much less time.  A lot of vendors won’t even sign contracts more than a year in advance and some I can’t even book until 60-90 days before the wedding.

The only ones you might have a problem with are the ones that are super popular venues, photographers, and DJs.  They can and do book up more than a year in advance, especially for the popular wedding seasons.  If you have your heart set on a particular venue, photographer or DJ then I would go ahead and get in contact with them to find out the details on bookings and ask about dates.  Otherwise, 9-12 months is plenty of time to plan a nice wedding.

Post # 8
79 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

We had an (almost) 2 year engagement and I felt the same way! Looking back, all the “planning” I thought I was doing that first year was just stressing about stuff that I ended up actually planning this year. Don’t let them stress you out too much, but do be aware that some things (like dress alterations) that a crazy long period of time for no apparent (to me, anyway) reason. 

Post # 9
367 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

We’re getting married between November 2014 and February 2015, as it depends on which venue we choose. All of the Saturdays in November 2014 are booked already at my preferred venue! I was quite surprised to find this out, as I thought I was enquiring quite early when I contacted them last week.

If you are looking at getting married in 2014, I would consider setting a budget and reserving a venue now (if they are in demand in your area, as they appear to be in mine) and then leaving the finer details until closer to the time.

Post # 10
1670 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

We decided to get married during a phone call last October (what romance!) and started roughly thinking about when we wanted to get married. We picked my parent’s anniversary (aww yay right) and that is the ONLY reason we went ahead and booked things, because the day was super important to us.

My venue already had two bookings for September 2014 when I booked this week. I think if you are really into having it at a certain venue or on a certain day, you should start now. Otherwise, you probably have some time!

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