(Closed) Director annoyed that I called out for a funeral?!

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

Honestly? don’t worry about it, and if she asks who specifically, tell her it was your aunt. Not really a lie, especially if you are close to FI’s family.  I called his aunts and uncles aunt and uncle well before we were married

Post # 4
3788 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

My Fiance almost wasn’t able to come to my mom’s funeral. We scheduled it later in the morning to coincide with his lunch/commute between schools/planning period. He is a long-term substitute teacher so he has that break because he is split between two schools. The problem is that he is not allowed to miss any days or he won’t get first year teacher pay at the end of the year; you have to be a sub for 127 consecutive days to get it. So missing one day in the middle will seriously cost you THOUSANDS of dollars (the difference between $75/day and a salary…). There was no way he could have taken even a half day to go to it. We’re lucky we were able to work it out. His administrators were understanding, but it’s how the rule is set up, too bad basically.

I’m sorry to hear about his aunt. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts.

Post # 6
1231 posts
Bumble bee

its really none of her business who passed away. Unfortunately some people aren’t as close to family and don’t see the whole point of taking time out of life to pay thier respects. That would piss me off to if someone gave me an attitude about going to a funeral.

I’m really sorry about your loss. I have an Uncle who disappears for long periods of time. He lives in the city so we drive by to make sure his truck moves so we know he’s ok. I’m afraid something may happen and know one will know. Take the time to remember your fiance’s aunt and your director will just have to realize your life doesn’t revolve around her.

Sorry you had to deal with that, some people just suck sometimes!

Post # 8
6830 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I am sorry to hear that.  I wouldn’t worry about it. Though I know for my company you can only take time off for immediate family. So parents and grandparents, and if you are not married you have to be living with your SO for a year and then you are considered domestic partners and they will give you funeral leave. I found this out last year when FI’s grandmother passed away. 

Post # 9
2512 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I am sorry for your loss.

Do you think maybe your director is just not the type of person that is good with words? I know that when it comes to death I always stay quiet because I have no idea how to comfort the person without making them feel emotional. Do you think that could be a possibility?

Post # 11
5977 posts
Bee Keeper

Don’t worry about it. Seriously – you’re allowed to call out for a death in the family. Do you know if you have an HR handbook or something that states the policy on berevement? Just something you might be able to back up your calling out so that she doesn’t try to pull one on you.

Sorry to hear about J’s aunt – my thoughts and prayers are with you all!

Post # 14
3866 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

@Sassygrn: sheesh.  can companies be MORE unemotional???  I mean, really?

Not that my company is any better.  You get ONE day off for extended family (grandparents, aunts/uncles) and three for immediate (parents, siblings).  They’ll let you take more time off, but it’s either unpaid or you use vacation time.  


@DesireeAnne: sorry you’ve gotta deal with being hassled (in a way) about taking time off for a death in the family.  ๐Ÿ™  It doesn’t matter who’s side she was on, it’s still sad and the family (regardless of who’s it is) needs support.  ๐Ÿ™  hopefully they’ll just ignore it and go on with the day’s business.  I don’t think they’ll fall apart without you for one day ๐Ÿ˜‰  If they do, well, at least you know how important you are!!!! ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 16
8738 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

I’m so sorry for your loss. Hopefully this is the last you have to hear about calling out, but people can be so insensitive sometimes.

The topic ‘Director annoyed that I called out for a funeral?!’ is closed to new replies.

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