(Closed) disappointed in my BM and her hubby

posted 10 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
7884 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

Yeah- I can see why you’re annoyed.  You’d think she might have mentioned she was coming into town.  Its the kind of sneaking behind your back that makes it bad.

Post # 5
4479 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch

I’m sorry. 🙁 That kind of stuff is so frustrating. But she probably felt guilty and didn’t know how to tell you, so she just avoided. You’ll be happier if you can forgive her… will it help you to talk to her about it?

Post # 6
368 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I hate friends who cannot just say how they feel. It is very irritating and frustrating because it makes you loose trust in your friends. I understand why you are annoyed and I would be too. Maybe she didn’t want to tell you she was going to NY because she didn’t want you to be pissed that she is paying for a flight to Ny but you are still paying for her dress for the wedding. Maybe she thought you would question her on how she could afford the trip out?? Not saying you would, but could that be why she neglected to tell you?

Post # 7
1426 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

But what if the other couple specifically asked them not to mention it?  I mean, I’ve told friends of mine not to talk about my wedding around certian mutual friends who aren’t invited.  It may not be that your Bridesmaid or Best Man thought you couldn’t handle it, but that the other couple was feeling self conscious about how many people they had to leave off their invite list… I wouldn’t read too much into it.

Post # 9
655 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Totally feel you. I would be really pissed and hurt… feeling all sorts of emotions. Like why if we’re such good friend you don’t trust me to understand? Did she think you’d be mad? I mean, what would be the point of concealing it? Did she think you’d be hurt you weren’t invited to the wedding and they were? Either way, you’re right– you’re adults and I’m sure you could have handled the truth. If it were me, I’d have to talk to her about it but not until I wasn’t mad anymore and moved into the emotion of hurt. I would have to get off my chest that I was hurt she couldn’t tell me and what was the point? Did she think you’d be mad? Any rate– so sorry you have to deal with that.

Post # 10
831 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Ouch! Not cool at all. I would confront her about it, and see what her response is. I think you’ve been an awesome bride/friend since you bought her dress and what not for your wedding!

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