(Closed) Disappointed in unsupportive bridesmaids. Am I being unreasonable?

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
637 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I don’t think you’re being unreasonable at all! You’ve already let them know that your finances are stretched so they should hear what you’re saying and understand. I would send them another email letting them know how much their friendship means to you but that between x date and x date, you simply do not have the funds or vacation time for anymore girls trips – as much as you appreciate they include you in them. Let them know that you are happy to spend time with them, at home or dinner (or other low cost gatherings). And assure them that they are free to plan their trip without including you in them, that you’re not going to feel left out! 

Weddings are tough, especially when you’re paying for all or a lot of the costs on your own! If your friends are already married, they may have forgotten how stressful a time it can be and how stretched your finances can get. If they’re not married, then the costs and time off required to plan are probably not the first thing on their mind! 

Good luck! It sounds like you’re friends really love you and jsut don’t want to leave you out of their plans!

Post # 4
995 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@blinx81:  You know, they’re supposed to pay for you at your bachelorette/hen party—if they’re not willing to do this then you are perfectly in the right saying no I can’t travel for it. I’m not saying that they should HAVE to pay but if they don’t want to there are plenty of cheap bachelorette party options

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