Post # 1
Just need to vent a little bit. Our photographer is great and I have no qualms about her at all. We just got our engagement photos back from her and I feel disappointed, mostly in my appearance. I feel like I look chunky even though I worked really hard to lose 20 lbs recently. I have a genuine smile in most of them, unfortunately this means my eyes are super squinty in pretty much all the photos. FI didn’t really want to do the photos and only did it in the end because it was included in our photography package, and to be honest you can tell in the pictures. There are only one or two photos where we both have genuine smiles. It was also 90+ degrees and humid so my hair poofed and curled (not in a flattering way) almost immediately.
I know its not a big deal and I know it’s not the photographer’s fault (the photos are actually gorgeous besides my appearance). I guess it’s just my insecurities but I honestly don’t want to share these these on Facebook, put them on our save the dates or anything. Is this normal? Should I just get over it?
Post # 2
I think the more you look at them you might come to like them, we are also our own worst critics!
when i first got my wedding pics back I felt like I looked like a whale in the pictures and was humiliated, but I looked at them more and more and realized I was being an idiot!
Post # 3
I’d suggest putting them away for a few weeks and then going back to look at them after you’ve had some time away. Often our first impressions of things like this aren’t great because we half expect them to turn out badly, so of course the first thing we see are flaws. Maybe some time and distance will do you some good!
Post # 4
- Wedding: September 2017 - Poppy Ridge Golf Course
I’m sure you’re being hard on yourself and look beautiful to everyone else. 🙂 I don’t like taking photos nor am I photogenic so I understand how it is to look at pics and pick apart every minor flaw. Depending on how hard I’m smiling my eyes may disappear altogether! Like your Fiance mine was only agreeing to engagement photos for me and I felt his attitude might show through in photos plus I didn’t think the extra expense was worth it so we’re excluding them from our package. There’s no law that says you have to use personal photos for STD’s if you honestly don’t care for them maybe find an alternative. We’re using a photo of penguins bowed into a heart shape for STD’s. But I think the more you look at them the better you’ll feel about them. And congrats on the 20lb loss! Thats major. 😀
Post # 5
- Wedding: April 2017 - Valleybrook Country Club
I thought I looked terrible in half of my photos and I was picking up on the smallest silliest details, but other people didn’t even notice and everyone said I was crazy, so the more I realized how much of a perfectionist I was being, I started to really enjoy them and used them on the save the dates and website.
Post # 6
I totally can understand where you are coming from…I think I will feel the same way when the time comes. I know I will think I look big in photos even if I lose 20lbs, I just see myself that way in photos!! Like I think I look bigger in photos than I do in the mirror and it makes me wonder what I really look like…kind of scary. As you said they were part of your package so if you don’t love them, you shouldn’t feel like you have to use them for anything if you don’t love them. I agree with concordbee
that some time could help though, it might just be your initial reaction based on whatever your expectation was.
Post # 7
Post the pictures?
I tend to hate the way I look in pictures too… I wouldn’t worry about it too much. Just remember not to go all squinty eyed for the wedding pictures! I have the same problem too, haha.
Post # 8
A genuine smile is always better than those “I’m dead inside” half smile things when someone is trying not to squint. If you look happy, I’m sure you look beautiful 🙂
Post # 9
good point! I guess this was a bit of a learning experience for us since we arent used to having our pictures taken so now I know what not to do at the wedding lol. And I’m sure professional hair and makeup will make a huge difference too. I will post a couple but I’ll probably take them down soon just for privacy purposes.
Post # 10
- Wedding: September 2017 - The Meadows
It’s hard to be okay with photos when you don’t like the way you look. But congrats on losing 20lbs! If nothing else, this is something where you now know how to be a bit more comfortable in front of the camera. I think that even genuine smiles, while they might not be perfectly photogenic, they’re still your real emotions and that’s important. A friend of mine’s laugh is loud, infectious, and she knows that it’s not the most becoming when she does it. But those are some of our favorite photos from the day; because the happiness is genuine and true.
You don’t have to share anything. If you’re going to feel self conscious about it, don’t put yourself through it. You’re not required to do anything that makes you feel bad or uncomfortable.
Post # 11
- Wedding: November 2019 - Canada
I agree with PP’s who said to give it a little time. I really didnt like mine when I first saw them. Thought i looked big and too posed… but the more I looked at them, I realized how beautiful they were. Now I love them…even though I’m not with H anymore! haha
Post # 12
Wow I feel like I could have written the original post… I feel the same way… I don’t know what I’m going to do about it… what are you going to do? I feel like my arms and legs look lumpy and weird and I think the style of my photographer is more raw and stylish rather than soft and airy so I might have picked the wrong person. I don’t want to post mine either. I’m sure you look beautiful but insecurities do exist and I’m not sure how I feel about paying a ton for photos I don’t want to show off… I’m eager to know what you might do.
Post # 13
Have you tried the mirror trick? The human face is not symmetrical, and we only see ourselves reversed (in the mirror) so when you see a photo and you think “what the hell, I don’t look like that” you’re right, you don’t, you’re seeing yourself in reverse. Sometimes if you hold the photo up to the mirror you’ll see the you you’re used to and like it better 🙂
Post # 14
Thanks everyone who commented so far! I went through a picked my favorites and it actually helped to just look through those alone instead of along with the ones I don’t like. Here are a few:
Post # 15
Those pictures are lovely!!! It’s definitely your insecurities speaking, and WHERE is the chunky? You look beautiful and the bth of you look happy, any of these photos would look great as a Save the Date 🙂