Post # 31
MsChica, I understand your point and I think it’s great that you are at peace with the way your proposal went. But I don’t think it’s constructive or accurate to suggest that having a dream for a romantic proposal makes anyone a bridezilla. That is a very negative and hurtful term and I think I was quite careful in explaining that I do love my fiance and can’t wait to marry him.
As a bride I’m very laid back. I’m much more focused on the marriage than the wedding, but that doesn’t mean I’m not allowed to care about the wedding and the proposal. I don’t feel that there is only one "perfect" way to propose and nothing less would be acceptable; I just wanted some thought towards what I would like. I think it’s a far leap from that wish to treating your wedding party like your personal slaves and screaming obscenities at perfectly reasonable vendors.
Post # 32
I’ve been there!My husband to-be did the same thing .The ring was all wrong ,it looked like a tween ring .It did’nt look grown up at all.I waited until it was time to pick the bands ,and when mine did not match his he came to the conclusion that the ring would not work.So we came to an agreement to trade it in for another one.
What I’m trying to say is men are sensitive when it comes to things like that,especially because he picked it out all by himself.In his mind he thinks he did great.
Just wait it out and see how it unfolds once you shop for the bands.
I don’t really have anything to say about the proposal .But in your sweetest voice ask what he went through to plan the event.
Post # 33
Okay – I had a similar experiance, I was disappointed in my fiances proposal, all I asked of him was not to do it in the house. We waited until we were at my cabin which would have been great, but he had my 3 year old ask, and 30 seconds after I was right back in reality with bath time, bed time and all the mom things. I didn’t even get to enjoy it. Not to mention I spent the whole week up there not being ablt to enjoy it, with my sister who was simply pissed my ring was bigger then hers and dumped on all the wedding ideas I had.
The ring I was thirlled with but the actual creation of it was something he took into his own hands and enlisted a friend….as for your ring….
You have to wear it your whole life, and he shoulnd’t have picked out what HE wanted you to wear he should have picked out what he knew you would love. What matters is that you are comfortable and you love the ring. It shoulnd’t be something you hide and if he really loved you he would understand this when you tell him. Yes, he’s going to be a bit hurt – but you know what my fiance was too when I told him that I was a bit put off by how he asked me….or had my kid ask me….but he got over it, we moved past it and he was glad I told him the truth even if it did hurt a bit. He knoew it would have killed me to carry that around with me forever.
Good luck. Keep us updated!
Post # 35
Ahhhh I am SO glad and relieved this post is on here… I literally am about to cry. I felt like I was THE only girl who was like “is this seriously how you’re PROPOSING to me????”? I was SOOOOO disappointed in the proposal. I still am, and it’s been really hard to get over. Every time we see a movie w/ a good proposal, he knows I’m about to turn angry towards him… Well you know what I’m so freakin sorry he couldnt take two seconds to plan a decent freaking proposal. I am still, clearly, pissed about it, but my ring, fortunately, makes up for it. He literally did it in our house, with me sitting on the couch, in my PJ’s… we were both drinking (yeah, i know.. I’m like…really?!!!??) He didn’t even get on one knee… nothing… I said “yeahhhh” when he asked me b/c I was confused if he was serious… ugh!! I love him, he’s def my best friend… But, I have done so many OVER the top things for him that I at leassssst thought he could do something nice for the proposal. Nope!! What-ever. It took me 2 full days to even tell anyone we were engaged bc I didnt want to mentally relive the proposal…. If we hadn’t been together so long and/or if he hadnt been so great, I probably wouldnt have said yes, gave him back the right… and told him to try again when he was serious, but hell it took so freaking long for him to get his ass in gear in the first place, that I was like… whaaaatever. Just b/c Im a perfectionists doesnt mean everyone else is I guess.
Post # 36
Um, so I finally found this post on weddingbee…because back in October when Fiance proposed, I did a google-search for “disappointing proposals” in the hopes that SOMEONE else could relate–and found THIS very post back then!
Yes, I too had a disappointing proposal…I do want to share it on this board, get it off my chest so I can just say “THERE! I’m DISAPPOINTED!” and then get over it. I plan to, but now isn’t a good time because I’ve already gotten irked with Fiance over something else today (and posted here) and don’t need to nurture any more negative feelings about him at the moment, so I’ll wait till I’m feeling more stable. But yes, I can relate, and yes, I am grateful to find that I’m not the only one!
Post # 37
I think a good way to aproach it would be to work with him to change the ring but not to mention the proposal. The proposal is over and done with so there’s nothing you can do about that. But the ring is here and now so why not change it to be something you love? I’m sure you can bring it up in a tactful way that respects that effort/money he put into the ring.
Post # 38
Holy cow this post is old!
Is Cathleya Pengy??? Hehe 🙂
Post # 40
I would try and start your own thread…I doubt the OP is even on this website anymore and you’ll probably get a lot more responses from current users.