(Closed) Disappointing proposal, talked with him and he broke up with me!

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 91
Member
1141 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

If the ring and proposal were that important and weren’t done to your satisfaction, then why did you say yes? 

Post # 92
Member
3277 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

calendula:  

+10000 So true. The OP was wrong but so was her ex.

Working through difficult periods is a huge part of marriage. 

 

Post # 93
Member
3277 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Ellicott:  

I know I said yes to my bad proposal and disappointing ring because I loved my husband more than those things. The ring and proposal were important to me but not as much as marrying my husband. 

Maybe this is what the OP was thinking?

Post # 94
Member
998 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2015 - City Hall!

Glad HE dodged a bullet.

Post # 95
Member
7414 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

MrsMeowton:  the OP says that she and her ex talked and that he took a whole week of thinking and talking to her before he cut all contact. That’s not just skipping out on a relationship. That’s a carefully thought-out decision. Calling it “appaling” just reinforces the notion that women are entitled to some crazy extravagant ring or proposal. If your partner has a secret, or a side of their personality they’ve not yet showed you, and you don’t like it, youre not required to try counseling or whatever. You can walk away. It’s not appalling at all to think things over and decide you simply can’t live with that person for the rest of your life.

Post # 96
Member
1141 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

PositiveThinking:  Obviously not if she complained about the ring and proposal to him.

I was proposed to with a hot sauce packet that said “Will You Marry Me”.  FI passed the packet to me and said ‘How about it?”.  I said “Why not?” and that was my proposal.  Now, before you think t hat he had a hot sauce packet specially made, he didn’t.  The hot sauce bin was filled with packets that said “Will You Marry Me”.  I didn’t give a shit.  And, nobody in friggin Taco Bell even knew we just got engaged, didn’t applaud, or anything.  I didn’t give a shit about that, either.  And, proposal was sans ring.  I didn’t give a shit about that, either.  I was thrilled that the guy I was in love with wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. 

It never dawned on me to think that my proposal was shitty. Not once after the fact did I think “Where was the bended knee, where was the fancy diner with champagne, where was the hoopla.   And I DO NOT find my proposal shitty at all … although I’m sure the entire population here on the WB would be absolutely appalled if that was their proposal story.  And I would never want a “do over” proposal.  As for the ring … I got a family heirloom and I am delighted with it. 

 

Post # 97
Member
600 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

Ellicott:  I actually think your proposal was absolutely laid back and adorable! (Haha also, Taco Bell is myself and DH’s favorite fast food place!!)

Post # 98
Member
9042 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

Ellicott:  Your proposal sounds awesome sauce!

PositiveThinking:  I don’t even remember my proposal as I was so ill and I don’t wear a ring. It never even occurred to me to be upset or disappointed, the only thing I felt were joy, excitement and happiness. 

Post # 99
Member
600 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

j_jaye:  I seriously love all of your comments. You are so real and honest, it makes me smile!!

OP, the majority has said what I would’ve said so good luck in life! If he wants to come back, he’ll contact you. But I’m sorry, you really screwed this one up 🙁

Post # 101
Member
3277 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Ellicott:  

I’m glad that you were happy with your proposal. However, if a woman is not happy with her ring or proposal that doesn’t automatically make her a bad person. 

I agree about not wanting a “do over” proposal. I don’t want one but my husband would like to ask me again. I’m not about to stomp on his plans if another proposal will make him happy. Mu hubby just wants to add to the romance of our vow renewal. 

Post # 102
Member
209 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

It’s not about the ring…..it’s not about the proposal…..or dress…or the wedding. It’s about the marriage.  It’s about the next 50 years of your life with the man that you love.  Someone who will be with you through all the good and the bad.  

Post # 103
Member
310 posts
Helper bee

FutureAK:  Of course you do, you found a fellow troll!

Post # 104
Member
444 posts
Helper bee

So you’ve been together for 9 years and he is upset that people on Facebook know you got engaged? Seems legit.

Post # 105
Member
594 posts
Busy bee

Ellicott:  Fire Sauce packets! I actually considered proposing to my partner with one of those – your story made me grin from ear to ear! 

I don’t get the people calling the ex unstable or immature. What he did is called “having standards”. Reverse it: if a woman went through a lot of trouble to (for example) make a lovely birthday dinner for her partner, and they responded, “This sucks! I wanted something fancier and more expensive, and no one even saw it!” whose side would you be on?

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