Post # 1
I stumbled upon this website a couple of hours ago after I googled “disappointing proposals” to read other stories that might make me feel better about my own sadly enough. I just got engaged this past weekend and I was slightly disappointed by what went down. It ook me a while to muster a yes when he popped the question. Within the next 2 days I was questioning why I said yes and then I began to question why I was questioning at all. This is a guy who I am in love with and have been with for four years. We’ve had our emotional ups and downs but we’ve never broken up and we’ve always been each other’s steady rocks. Anyway to make a long story short, I was sad that the proposal wasn’t exactly my dream proposal and I felt a little gypped because the moment that a guy confesses how much he wants to spend the rest of his life with you on his knees, it’s a pretty big deal. Needless to say my guy didn’t do that. What he did instead in his own romantic way was make a video game for the both of us to play that quickly retold the story of us and our special moments all in the span of 10 minutes. It’s very personal to him and I appreciate that he made it so personal but for some reason, I never imagined I would be getting proposed to by a computer screen followed by him on one knee. Just an aside, he is a comp science major and currently is a software engineer so this is his passion and is what he’s good at but still…I was just expecting more of the traditional things that would sweep ME off my feet. I’m a huge romantic and I was hoping that he would want to make the proposal day a little more special from my perspective (fancy dinner, us in fancy clothes, somewhere private that is meaningful to the both of us etc). Is it so wrong to feel as if the day should be about him trying to court me?
Anyway so despite being engaged for the past 6 days, my excitement has been lackluster and I’ve been moping around all week. And then today I realized that maybe I wasn’t confused about him perse or my love for him but just that I was a little disappointed that one of the biggest moments of a girl’s life got a little anticlimatic. I don’t think I’ll ever tell him how I felt about his proposal but it’s just nice to read that others have been in my shoes before and have made it through.
That is all of my 2 cents for now.
Post # 3
@urbanpink: First off, welcome to the hive. I’m glad you joined us! It’s always nice to see how we can all relate to one another in different situations.
I wanted to congratulate you on your engagement. I’m sorry it wasn’t your dream proposal, but now you can have your dream wedding! Sometimes we have to remember that it takes guys a lot of time and thought going into the actual proposal. I’m sure it could’ve been a million times better, but it was from the heart and he loves you!! That’s definitely worth being happy and excited about. =)
Post # 4
okay…..has your now Fiance ever been that “prince charming type” that gets down on his knee?
My Fiance and I have been together almost 9 years before he asked…i knew, he tried to hide it but i knew…and we were at a fabulous steak house (I love steak) and he just plopped the ring box in front of me and asked me to marry him….i opened the box and the ring was HUGE….of course I said yes…we’ve shared our lives for 9 years, i love him and don’t wnat to live without him…BUT we are not PDA we want everyone to know people
people at work found out this week that I got engaged (we got engaged in december) because I brought in a cake that said it from a barbeque (i did not want to ea the whole thing so took it to work for people to eat…) …I’ve gotten a few congrats since then….
why are you not excited? was it not as exciting as you thought?
Post # 5
I think that’s kind of a cool proposal! It took thought and time, not like my Fiance and I who just so happened to see a ring that I had always liked on clearance, then we figured we might as well buy it and get married. THAT’S not romantic. lol
Post # 6
He MADE you a video game?! That is awesome. I think it’s so sweet he used your story and special moments in it too! Personally, I think your proposal story is so unique and will be more fun to tell down the road than him just asking you over a fancy dinner! Congratulations!
Post # 7
Dude, that’s crazy awesome. And a LOT of work. I get that you’re not into video games (and I’m not either), but it’s A LOT of work to pull off what he did.
My Fiance is an Electrical Engineer and he proposed in bed. I’m super happy about my proposal, but yours is AMAZING. And again, I HATE gaming. I just realize the effort that goes into it.
Also, I’m not trying to be bitchy at all! Just try and appreciate the effort 🙂
Post # 9
I actually think that is a ridiculously romantic and amazing proposal. He spent hours creating an entire video game recounting your history and making it perfect to propose to you. I understand proposal disappointment – I wasn’t surprised by mine and I know my sister basically showed my husband everything to do. I feel like if you are looking for something to be disappointed about it, it’s there. But I personally feel that this is an incredible proposal and you are lucky to have someone who would spend so much time and effort into making a personal and unique proposal.
Welcome to the hive and happy planning 🙂
Be happy mon!
Post # 10
My Fiance woke me up from working a 12-hour 3rd shift with enough time to pop the question and send me back off to work for another 3rd shift. lol. NOT romantic but because he even had the nerve to do it made it wonderful.
Post # 11
Wow-I think your proposal was very cool. For him it was personal, he obviously put thought and effort into it and to be honest, I don’t know what else you could want. I hope you never let him know you were disappointed. I guess I read about a lot of proposals and never have understood how women decide what should happen. If a man you love dearly asks you to marry him, does it really matter what the format of the question is? There will be so many more important times in your life that you can’t orchestrate but they will all have special meaning just the same. Congratulations to you both!
Post # 12
Personally, I think a video game is pretty cool. It takes alot of work to do a video game and its something you can actually keep and show your kids some day.
Post # 13
Thanks for all the feedback everyone! (And I’m glad you guys all seem to think a video game is pretty awesome) I think I will love exploring this website and conversing with all of you bride to be’s!
He’s a huge gamer so I definitely do appreciate all the effort that he took into making the game. I love him but I don’t love playing video games as much which is why I was a little surprised that he chose to propose in that way.
Anyway, he’s done really romantic things in the past. Perhaps I was expecting something on par with something like for example, he took me on top of a roof on one of our date nights, made dinner for me up there, with candle light and flowers. We spent the night under a blanket just watching the stars in the sky. (That was also the first time I told him I loved him.)
BUT, as I said before, this is a new perspective. No more dwelling on what my dream proposal would have been and just embracing that I have an amazing guy who loves me. 🙂
Post # 14
I think its awesome, like everyone else said it sounds like a lot of hard work, time, and effort, I would think that qualfies as a dream proposal. It’s unique and perfect because it represents you guys specficly.
While there is nothing wrong with the standard fancy dinner, drop to one kneee and ask prosposal, it’s can be a bit generic. I think perhaps sometimes an image can get into our heads about what the “perfect” and “dreamlike” events are supposed to be like. Appreciate what you have, and appreciate the fact that your Fi chose a personal meanfuling way to express his love and ask you to spend the rest of your lives together. Rather then comparing it to what the media/cultural norms have influence us to think should happen.
Post # 15
@urbanpink: I wouldn’t worry about it. My super romantic Fiance did not propose in an incredibly romantic way other although it was in a very romantic spot. (handed me a ring box over dinner). Some guys don’t like to go over the top with proposals, it feels weird.
Post # 16
@the_future_mrs: haha that was not bitchy at all! I appreciate your honesty. And he did tell me that he spent a year on the game as a side project which made me really glad that I said yes otherwise I would have been a real jerk to turn him down because it wasn’t my dream proposal. I guess every girl has her own fantasies of what that ring day would be like but in the end, all that matters is the guy giving her the ring.