(Closed) Disinvited bridesmaid

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 33
1184 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@littleladyinlove:  In regards to the update, I echo the pp’s who say that with a new engagement, she gets to choose a whole new wedding party.  

However her way of telling you that was pretty harsh, IMO.

If you sing professionally, I would give her your rates.  You shouldn’t have to give up income for this girl’s wedding if she doesn’t consider you a good enough friend to have you in her wedding.  

Post # 34
1664 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2024

I would decline to sing and maybe not even attend. She told you on a street corner while going to meet up with other friends? RUDE. She doesn’t sound like a good friend. If she wants you to sing, she can pay you.

Post # 35
975 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

Perhaps familial pressures with regards to keeping her wedding plans more modest this time around has necessitated a reduction in the bridal party. I wouldn’t really be offended, especially if you hadn’t been as close as you used to be over the last two years. But she does seem to want you to participate in the wedding and has asked you to use the talent only you possess to sing.

If you wish to continue the friendship, I’d consider being asked to sing an honor. If you’re fed up with her crap, perhaps decline singing and just say you’d prefer to attend as a guest.

Post # 36
9971 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I wouldn’t go, and I would decline her offer to sing at the wedding. She was incredibly rude for what she did, and you don’t owe her any courtesy back.

Post # 37
7974 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

i wouldn’t want to.

Post # 38
2009 posts
Buzzing bee

@littleladyinlove:  She probably feels really bad about having to ask you to step down so she wanted to give you another role so you’d still know how important you are to her even if she can’t have you as a bridesmaid.

Even if she went about it the wrong way, I doubt it was malicious. You can decline to sing as it may have been a pitty offer anyway so don’t feel bad about that.

It does suck though to know that you were the one chosen to be “let go”. Maybe she just figured you’d be the most understanding about it where as the other BMs would’ve flipped shit.

The topic ‘Disinvited bridesmaid’ is closed to new replies.

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