(Closed) DIY everything Wedding…Groomsmen leaving….Groom trouble….HELP

posted 7 years ago in Grooms/men
  • poll: Did you/Have you had a Bridal Party Member or Goomsman back out after saying yes?
    Yes : (2 votes)
    18 %
    No : (9 votes)
    82 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2891 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    I wish I had advice. Have you tried talking to him? Asked him what it will take to be excited?

    Maybe other bees will have more input BUMP

    Post # 4
    Member
    96 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    Who am I to say any of this, but I’d focus less on cheering him up or trying to get him excited. Try to acknowledge that he has legitimate concerns: you are over-budget, his friends are bailing on him, and he’s having close, personal family problems. I just think those are such legitimate excitement-killers that one can’t expect him to be all peppy and want to glue programs all day. How about attacking the budget? If you’re too far down the road on wedding deposits, etc., can you slash some of the rest of your household budget? Can you do anything to address his brother situation yourself? He may need some comfort around these issues, before his brain will allow him to care about the minutiae. I might add that you could communicate to Mr. Fiance that it’s completely fine that you have uneven (even if wildly uneven) bridal parties.  I’d have half a mind to tell this last fella to go take a hike if he can’t commit. Especially since he was picked to better even up the sides. Seriously, do you want to deal with making Johnny Maybe’s suit jacket?

    Being upset and disengaged from the wedding (or work, or whatever) seems like an appropriate response to what’s going on in his life. But don’t worry too much: just because he’s withdrawn from it now, doesn’t mean he’s not going to be engaged and loving it when you get to your wedding weekend. Then he could get that all-too familiar sense of, “Thank God all the little to-dos are over with and I can just have fun and relax with the folks who mean the most to me.”

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