Post # 1
wondering if i have any say in my shower. my sister/moh took charge of the planning after she through a fit that my friends were planning it for me. she said that i was keeping her out of it…..but she never stated that she had any plans to throw one. so my friends backed up a bit and let her b in charge. she sends me a text asking me if feb 23rd is ok for the shower and if march 2nd is ok for the bach party. i tell her march 2 should b ok but that i thought that the 23rd was too close to the wedding for the shower. she says that her daughters birthday is jan 26 & the wknds before and after v-day isnt going to work for people. i just say that i still think its too close to have it anf her response is that people who come to the shower and bring a gift wont bring one to the wedding so what does it matter when we have it. my wedding is march 9th. its not really about the gifts. in the month before the wedding she expects people to speng 3 saturdays doing stuff for my wedding. i know that alot of my friends cant do that. so do i have any say in when the shower or celebrations are? my guess is no. i just feel like she is setting it up for people not to b able to come to the parties.
Post # 3
wait what? she said people who bring a shower gift won’t bring a wedding gift? i’ve never heard of that before. my shower was 3 months before my wedding (mainly because my sis wanted it to be during a good weather month and in the SF bay area, september is a good month) and people got some stuff off our registry that was geared for a shower (like small kitchen items). those same people also got a wedding gift. i’m not trying to say it’s all about the gifts. i’m just saying i think your sis is wrong about that.
to answer your question- you should get a say in the date of the shower & bachelorette party.
Post # 4
Can you have your shower before her daughter’s birthday? And everyone who came to my shower also brought a gift to the wedding..
Post # 5
I ALWAYS bring a gift to both the shower and the wedding, I don’t know what she’s talking about. Honestly, you’re running out of time to invite people – you should be giving them at least 3 weeks’ notice, IMO. What’s wrong with February 2 or 9? Be firm with her – tell her Feb 23 is too close to the wedding, and that the only date that works for you is Feb 2 (or 9 or whatever you want).
Post # 6
thanks for your replys. i have been so upset about all of this. i told her that the shower should b 6-8 before the wedding. her reply was that no one goes by those rules. i would be fine doing the shower before my nieces birthday but shes waited so long to do anything people wouldnt have alot of time to prepare. im afraid if i make too big of a fuss i wont get to have a shower. i dont really need the gifts but i would still like to have the party u know.
Post # 7
@cassy.thompson1: Honestly, calm down. I don’t know any rules or general practices, but my wedding shower will be 3 days before my wedding because all of my family will be travelling (over 1500 miles) to come out for the wedding.
I wouldn’t put too much stress on the date/how far before, but focus more on if the date works for you and other people.
Post # 8
you should definitely have a say
Post # 9
You should definitely have a say, especially if it’s about the date.