(Closed) Do I have to?

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Do I have to?
    yes, it's about bringing family together so invite them : (15 votes)
    29 %
    No, just your friends/family! : (21 votes)
    40 %
    Compromise - just do girls mani/pedi then you don't have to deal with yet another family meal : (16 votes)
    31 %
  • Post # 3
    4137 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    i would invite fh’s sister and fmil…it’s just a nice gesture. maybe they’ll decline and opt to spend time with fh instead, but they should at least be invited.

    Post # 5
    1432 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    I would say that you should invite the Future Sister-In-Law and Future Mother-In-Law, but not the aunt, just because you want to stay on good terms with your in-laws, and they might decline to come, like @kitzy said, but it’s the gesture that counts.

     By the sound of it, your aunt couldn’t care less about this stuff, so I personally wouldn’t bother inviting her.  I’m sure she’d be surprised to even be invited.

    Post # 6
    111 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    Unless you really don’t like your Future Mother-In-Law, Future Sister-In-Law, or aunt, I would invite them. They may not even come, but they would probably be flattered to be invited at least.

    Post # 7
    569 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    I agree with the other Bees. I would invite Future Mother-In-Law and Future Sister-In-Law, but not the aunt. Your Future Mother-In-Law and Future Sister-In-Law will probably appreciate the invite (even if they don’t attend), but it doesn’t sound like your aunt would, given her comment about attending your wedding.

    Post # 10
    376 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I’m split on this. Traditionally, the Future Mother-In-Law would be invited to a lunch like this… but if you keep it casual and under the radar I think that you could do it without offending anyone. I voted for manis/pedis with the girls and then a larger lunch. 

    Perhaps make sure that your Fiance is doing lunch with Future Mother-In-Law and FSIL; that way they’ll have a wedding related activity and won’t feel left out. 

    I’m not sure why you need to invite your dad’s sister if you’re not close with her. Again, just don’t advertise your activities to her. 

    Post # 11
    459 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2010

    If it were me, I would just invite the friends and family I wanted to invite. It’s your chance to do something with women who are close to you! I also did not have a bridal party (other than a MOH), and I invited my mother and some close female friends to get ready with me before the wedding. It did not cross my mind to also invite my husband’s mother and two sisters.

    It seems like it is important to you to spend time with people that you are close with, so don’t feel pressured into bringing more people into it. You will have the rest of your life to be forced into doing things with the in-laws :).

    Post # 12
    2788 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: January 2011

    If you want to have something with just your friends, I would stick with mani/pedis only. If you want to have a lunch, then I think you do have to invite FMIL/FSIL.  You could do the mani/pedi first and then have a lunch with everyone afterward, like PP mentioned.

    The topic ‘Do I have to?’ is closed to new replies.

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