(Closed) do I have to invite them?

posted 5 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
1583 posts
Bumble bee

@AmyintheTARDIS:  You don’t have to invite anyone you do not want to share the day with. Don’t get bullied (may be a bit strong) into inviting people who might make you regret it later. Good luck!

Post # 5
Member
1710 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013 - Walt Disney World

@subtlebee:  +1

Post # 4
Member
1583 posts
Bumble bee

Also, SOOOO excited for my Christmas fix of the Doctor!

Post # 6
Member
772 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@AmyintheTARDIS:  Is your Mom paying or contributing financially in any way?  If so, then she does have a say in who’s invited.  Additionally…

If they aren’t coming anyway, why should I bother with an invitation?  I don’t want them there. 

Because why exacerbate an already tense family rift?  I’m sure you would hate for your wedding to cause further drama, right?  If you’re pretty sure they won’t attend anyway (which I imagine they won’t given it’s been years since you’ve had any communication) then send the invite.  If they do decide to attend, you can talk to your venue ahead of time to let them know who the bad seeds are OR hire security to keep everyone in line.

Post # 7
Member
1583 posts
Bumble bee

@JemmaWRX:  free food tends to make the rift raft show up! Why does she have to risk it? How about she negotiate with her mom and invite them to her birthday party =0p

Post # 8
Member
7758 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

No! Anyone who has physically threatened you or your mother doesn’t get an invite. Who cares if they get upset, they don’t like you anyway.

For the cousins it’s not quite so clear cut, because “rude” is not as bad as “threatening”. I’m tempted to invite them anyway but it’s a tough call.

Under normal circumstances I say invite all family equally. But when threats or violence is involved, that is not normal circumstances.

Post # 9
Member
275 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Unless you’re mom is paying for a significant part of the wedding, I would put your foot down and say no! Threatening family members and pervy family members have no place at your wedding.

 

Post # 10
Member
170 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Dont invite them it’s your wedding meant to be spent with your loved ones not people you feel uncomfortable around

Post # 11
Member
725 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

I say no you don’t.  One of my mom’s sister is estranged from the family.  She is not stable and has 2 children from 2 different men.  She has always been angry at my mom and causes drama and problems for my mom and her 4 other siblings.  She has NEVER attended any of my families weddings (including her closest sister and own sons.) of which she was invited.  Over the years she tries to regain contact with the famiily but it always ends the same with her having some problem and blaming everyone else.

Since I haven’t seen her or her daughter I never invited them.  We did however invite her son as we have been in contact over the last few years.  Chances are she wouldn’t have come to mine but I wasn’t willing to take that chance as IF she did come it would have ruined my wedding and I wasn’t going to risk it.  It was a great wedding and I am happy with all invite decisions we made.

Good luck.

Post # 12
Member
2448 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Heck no, it’s a wedding, crazies shouldn’t be allowed.

Post # 13
Member
772 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@subtlebee:  Really good point!

Post # 16
Member
450 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@AmyintheTARDIS:  #1- LOVE YOUR NAME, then looked up on NCIS to see River Song!

 

#2. I was always the family peace keeper. Don’t do it. It will kill your day and everything leading up to it. This is a day to begin the rest of your life, to begin your new family. You get to be an adult now… chose what YOU want. Do what will please YOU and YOUR Fiance… don’t let your family bully you….

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