(Closed) DO I HAVE TO REGISTER? What will happen

posted 12 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 3
44 posts
  • Wedding: April 2020

You don’t have to register, but it’s always nice to do a small registry (people like to give gifts).  My future sister in-law is getting married in Maui in 2 weeks and she did a small registry at Bed Bath & Beyond; most everyone brought her gifts to the Bridal Shower.  Typically if you’re having a destination wedding, guests would have your presents shipped to you or they get you gift cards.

Post # 4
350 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

I think it depends a lot on how established you and your Fiance are, home-wise.  If you’ve been living together, or you’ve both been out of college a while and your loved ones know you already have nice cookware/plates/small appliances, you will probably get cash. 

But if you’re young and just out of college, or you and your Fiance will be moving into your first home together, people may try to get you useful things for your new home.  If that’s the case, you could end up with great, useful stuff — but you could also end up with 3 Target bathmats plus two toaster ovens and a giant painting that isn’t your taste at all but can’t be returned.

If you and your Fiance are just starting out and need the traditional household stuff (toasters, towels, coffeepots, etc.), I would suggest you register for at least a few items and tell the store to ship them to your home address.  I don’t think you need to worry about people bringing gifts to a destination wedding — getting a gift on the plane is a major pain!  Your guests will probably just let the store ship you the gifts.

Post # 5
1245 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

Online registries allow gifts to send presents directly to your home instead of bringing them to the wedding. Try to get family/bridal party members to spread by word-of-mouth that you’d prefer this option if your wedding is a destination for you.

If you don’t need much, register at a place with a good return policy and lots of other things you’d want so you can just trade things in for gift cards. But you’ll end up with a lot of random things if you don’t give guests a guideline. Also, your guests will appreciate some sort of guidance. And hey, if they all end up giving you cards anyway, then no harm done. 

Post # 6
1061 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

I registered at a number of different stores and price points and I’m still getting off-registry stuff from people who clearly don’t know my Fiance or I (ie, [ugly] martini glasses when we don’t drink hard liquor). And yes, I’ve gotten the ubiquitous Target bath mats (in cream). So even if you tell them what you want, people will think they know better than you.

Also, you’d think that people would think to ship things to a destination wedding/shower, but I had one person bring an entire set of towels to my destination shower! I’d recommend getting a FedEx account and saving a bunch of boxes…

Post # 7
97 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2008

You don’t have to register at all!  We didn’t.  We just put a note on our website that we were lucky enough to have each other and our friends, and didn’t want any gifts.  we suggested that if people wanted to commemorate the wedding, they could give to a charity that is important to us. 

Post # 8
31 posts
  • Wedding: May 2008

We did the same as Livvie. Most people chose not to give gifts. Their prescence was gift enough!

Post # 9
2695 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2008

If you don’t register, and expect gifts, you will likely end up with a lot of stuff you don’t want and can’t return.  Registering allows people to get you want you want….

Post # 10
18 posts
  • Wedding: October 2008

I’m from the old school ladies.  Please provide a registery, even a charity registery is a terrific idea.


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